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ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Wight, Blowing a hoolie and heaving down. Harry roughers out there. Feet up with a glass of Pussers Rum, sleepy later.


[:)]

No Coke, pineapple juice or Crème de Menthe or something with the rum?

Just be honest and ask for something with one of those little umbrellas! [:D] [;)]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake


[:)]

No Coke, pineapple juice or Crème de Menthe or something with the rum?

Nope.

Did The Andrew really give out rum rations on subs with a couple of dozen thermonuclear warheads as well?

The tot ended in 1970. Resolution's first deterrent patrol was in 1968. So, yes.

ORIGINAL: sprior

The tot ended in 1970. Resolution's first deterrent patrol was in 1968. So, yes.

Well, that would have been the single warhead (200Kt) Polaris in '68, so I suppose that was safe, then.

[:)]

Good news! The USPS guy just brought the knives. They are so exquisite it brought tears to my eyes.

6 kinds of wood for the handles, beautiful inlays, awesome weight to the things.

Christmas is great. Just sit here with a martini and want for guys in short pants to bring cool stuff to the door.[:)]

Don't forget, you gotta wrap the $#@! things

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Christmas is great. Just sit here with a martini and want for guys in short pants

Perv

**************Pranning*************

Miyako-jima is at level 5, so some of the medium squadrons deploy there to help pound Okinawa.

Recon of Okinoerabushima and Kume-jima today. The former as a possible target for air assault, the later to make sure a single US Army RCT will be enough.
As I recall, there are some troops there but I think we interrupted their reinforcement of Kume-jima.

The notion on the two smaller isrands is to take them and build fighter strips in case Naha becomes a long siege.

Two regiments of Marines and some engineers left Sorong today. They are on slow-boats so I think they will miss the initial landings, but they might get there on time.

1st Marine is fully embarked at Batangas. 32nd ID almost fully embarked. No way to avoid traffic jams and troops loitering on the transports because we
don't have Manila and the other ports are crappy.

2 regiments embarking slowly at Iba. They might be ready to push off tomorrow but most likely 2 days. We are short on LST's and AKA's so AK's have been added.

8th Australian still loading at Batan Is. Most of the division is embarked and quite vulnerable. Sent a heavy and a light SCTF to cover.

2nd Amphibious Eng Regt pushing off from Naga today.

147th RCT (Kume-jima assault force) pushing off from Manado today with a lousy SC as an escort. I blame the staff.

The idea is to rendezvous near Batan Is in about 3d and then move on Okinawa.

ORIGINAL: sprior

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Christmas is great. Just sit here with a martini and want for guys in short pants

Perv

You are just jealous because it's 72 degrees here. [:)]

The UPS guy at work is apparently so hot the office staff sign up ahead of time to receive the shipping orders.

I might sign up one day just to see what the fuss is about.

Hmmmm? You don't suppose?

***********June 17, 1943(c)*************

Palau: Carrier raid was a dud. I think Yorktown sailed into Typhoon Haiyan. Not even recon flight. Also, a raid from Sorong over Palau did not fly.


Okinawa: JJ sends 4 DD's to Naha during daylight hours, sinking a PT boat but we fool them, we no show up. The three DD's we had there last turn returned to Miyako.
Curiosuly, none of the SBD's or TBF's at Miyako can be bothered to attack. Raids over Nago are grounded by bad weather.

Some Anns from ? Amamai Oshima attack our retreating PT boats.

Daito Shoto gets absolutely pulverized for a second day.


Port Blair: Colonel Frost lives!

Happy Christmas to all you poor sods who think this AAR is worth keeping up with.

For now I leave you with this:

My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have Sex?' 'No,' she answered. I then said, 'Is that your final answer?' ... She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying, 'Yes..' So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend." And that's when the fight started…
________________________________
I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first. "I'll have the rump steak, rare, please." He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?" "Nah, she can order for herself." And that's when the fight started.....
_____________________________
My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table. I asked her, "Do you know him?" "Yes", she sighed, "He's my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since." "My God!" I said, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?" And then the fight started...
________________________________
When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the shed, the boat, making beer.. Always something more important to me. Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. I said, "When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway." The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.
_____________________________
My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, "What's on TV?" I said, "Dust." And then the fight started...
________________________________
Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the van and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back; now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible." My loving wife of 5 years replied, "And, can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?" And that's how the fight started...
_______________________________
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds." I bought her a bathroom scale. And then the fight started...…
______________________________
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's License to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later. The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability too.' And then the fight started...
________________________________
My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She was not happy with what she saw and said to me, "I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.' I replied, "Your eyesight's damn near perfect." And then the fight started........
________________________________
I rear-ended a car this morning...the start of a REALLY bad day! The driver got out of the other car, and he was a DWARF!! He looked up at me and said 'I am NOT Happy!' So I said, 'Well, which one ARE you then?' That's how the fight started.
________________________________
One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift... The next year, I didn't buy her a gift. When she asked me why, I replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!" And that's how the fight started.

I rear-ended a car this morning...the start of a REALLY bad day! The driver got out of the other car, and he was a DWARF!! He looked up at me and said 'I am NOT Happy!' So I said, 'Well, which one ARE you then?' That's how the fight started.

Grumpy?[:)]

Happy Christmas to you and yourn(Sic), Lords and Ladies (or just crossdressers(Sic)),
Generals, Admirals, Gerneralissimos, major domos(Sic), entrepeneurs, HOA architectural compliance officers, breastaurant workers of the PTO and the entire staff at D,C & H.

A special shoutout(Sic) to our friends the Cargo Cultists, the Shinto Boys(Sic), the Mohammedans, the Global Cooling Believers, Father Emmanoulides (Greek Orthodox Christmas is in January..beats me), the You Know Whos(sic) and to Those Who Can't Decide.








*Editrix Note: I don't know where to start.

So I am checking out at Pavillions yesterday with the obvious stuff for a Christmas dinner and the cashier asks rotely;

Forty something cashier girl: "Did you find everything you needed?"

FAM: "Well, I forgot to get the sardines for the Caesar dressing. Do you know what I need?"
<I have severely faulty empathy antennae but I could tell she was down in the dumps so I tried to get her involved instead
of just rubbing it in by saying "Merry Christmas">

Forty something cashier girl: "I don't know how to cook. I just work here all the time. That's why nobody wants to marry me." <no hint of mirth>

FAM: <I say to myself> "Hory crap! Nice going Mandrake! You should have just said "Merry Christmas" like every other schlub. Now what?"
<lamely, painfully so, I try to recover> "Well, you can get discounts on food, right?" [:(][:(][:-]



Here is the deal. If you are going to do something to comfort someone during the holidays you need a plan or at least some track record of success and a toolbox of proven things to sayotherwise you are just taking a Brewster up against a Zero while the Zero-bonus is still on. I thought about inviting her to dinner but I decided I had already done enough damage.

I find it hilarious that IE version 17-A/438i/22q corrects "major domos" but not "breastaurant" [:D]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake


Editrix

Is this the lady of the house?

ORIGINAL: sprior

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake


Editrix

Is this the lady of the house?

If it were I would likely already by chopped up into little bits and cooling down in a meat freezer.

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

So I am checking out at Pavillions yesterday with the obvious stuff for a Christmas dinner and the cashier asks rotely;

Forty something cashier girl: "Did you find everything you needed?"

FAM: "Well, I forgot to get the sardines for the Caesar dressing. Do you know what I need?"
<I have severely faulty empathy antennae but I could tell she was down in the dumps so I tried to get her involved instead
of just rubbing it in by saying "Merry Christmas">

Forty something cashier girl: "I don't know how to cook. I just work here all the time. That's why nobody wants to marry me." <no hint of mirth>

FAM: <I say to myself> "Hory crap! Nice going Mandrake! You should have just said "Merry Christmas" like every other schlub. Now what?"
<lamely, painfully so, I try to recover> "Well, you can get discounts on food, right?" [:(][:(][:-]



Here is the deal. If you are going to do something to comfort someone during the holidays you need a plan or at least some track record of success and a toolbox of proven things to sayotherwise you are just taking a Brewster up against a Zero while the Zero-bonus is still on. I thought about inviting her to dinner but I decided I had already done enough damage.

It could have been worse. At one place I was shopping a female cashier had a Chemo therapy bald head and was talking to a customer. I am not sure what the rest of conversation was but the customer as she walked off said, " As long as you have your health".[&:]

Here's hoping something cheers up your Cashier.

Merry Christmas to all. I got my relatives tickets to Trans Siberian Orchestra. http://www.trans-siberian.com

ORIGINAL: Disco Duck

Merry Christmas to all. I got my relatives tickets to Trans Siberian Orchestra. http://www.trans-siberian.com

If these are your in-laws I know someone who could cause the train to derail in Krasnoyarsk.