Matrix Games Forums

Is hat envy a recognized medical condition?[:D]

I can see that WC is looking down at said transcriptionist [;)].
But WHAT is FDR looking UP at and WHY are his hands just so ???

ORIGINAL: rtrapasso

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Well, cooperating on the Manhattan Project is one thing, but sharing cloning technology? I think not. Look at Klaus Fuchs. The Brits have more closet Commies than a Global Cooling rally in Berkley. Imagine if the Russkis got ahold of cloning [X(]

Can you say Lenin 2?

Well, that COULD explain the Stalin quints...[;)]

"Stalin quints" [:D][:D][:D][:D]

ORIGINAL: Tallyho!

I can see that WC is looking down at said transcriptionist [;)].
But WHAT is FDR looking UP at and WHY are his hands just so ???

You mean Number 2? I think he is just trying to work on his haughty, patrician, chin-up posture.

His hands? I don't know. It's just too horrible to contemplate. You know what Sherman said (the General not the tank).

PS...we are waiting on a turn back from John. I think an alternate reality where Iwo Jima is under attack has moved to center stage on his agenda. [;)]

I did not know a tank could talk[:D]

**********Kiska Harobr, 12:20, January 14, 1943***********


On a miserably cold Aleutian day, Lt. Shimoda's dream of using the Empire's latest fighter as a mine-clearing sled comes to a tragic end, and with it, his career.



TF 28 encounters mine field at Kiska Island (92,35)

Japanese aircraft
no flights

Japanese aircraft losses
J2M Jack: 1 destroyed

Japanese Ships

MSW Wa 5
MSW Wa 4

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

**********Kiska Harobr, 12:20, January 14, 1943***********


On a miserably cold Aleutian day, Lt. Shimoda's dream of using the Empire's latest fighter as a mine-clearing sled comes to a tragic end, and with it, his career.



TF 28 encounters mine field at Kiska Island (92,35)

Japanese aircraft
no flights

Japanese aircraft losses
J2M Jack: 1 destroyed

Japanese Ships

MSW Wa 5
MSW Wa 4

[:D] [:D] [:D]

...

I got banned from the Islamic forum again and we can't seem to get any turns back from the bad guys so I had to entertain myself. Fortunately, I received a timely license renewal notice from the DMV.



So I drive down there on a Tuesday morning and there is no line outside. Woot! I go inside and it looks pretty civilized, sort of like a prison infirmary or something. Most of the clients dont speak English but this is Southern California so I am prepared for that. There is even a sign that says "RECEPTION". WOOT! Maybe they hired people let off from Nordstrom's. I walk up the RECEPTION lady. THERE IS NO LINE! WOOT!

"Hi, driver's, license renewal", I say and hand her my form.

"Wait for your number". she says without looking up and hands me a slip.

My joy is crushed by the harsh reality of the system. G 131! HOLY HELL! I do some quick calculations...10 to the 3rd..26 letters in the alphabet...HOLY HELL! That's 26,000! It couldn't be like at the donut shop with the "Please take a number" thing that goes up to 99 and starts over?

"Oh Dear God, please tell me the letter can only be in the first position", I say to myself. God doesn't answer. I am used to that too.

I sit down on a bank of steel framed chairs with enough welded struts to support the Saturn V. NASA surplus? As a state and federal taxpayer I am gratified to see this degree of cooperation. I try to read. It seems like it should be interesting, something on the unique physical and chemical properties of water, but I can't seem to concentrate. I glance around. The "clients" seem extraordinarily cooperative and pacific. Nobody complains. Even the toddlers sit contentedly on their mother's laps. I begin to feel an odd sense of euphoria myself.

"Phhht". My attention is drawn to a small device up at the ceiling. After a few seconds, there is another "Phhht" and faint mist emerges from the device. "Oh", I think to myself, "it's one of those automated room deodorizers". I look down the ceiling line and spot an identical device every 25 feet or so. "Phhht".

"Wow", I'm still thinking to myself, as I recall, "they must have a SERIOUS problem with rats in the roof or something". "WAIT A MINUTE!", I think I said this out loud as my neighbor looks my way slightly worried. "It's that aerosolized fentanyl the Russians invented! The BASTARDS! Dear God, please let them get the dose right."

"Phhht". It seems a bit more powerful this time. I sit down again. "What was I just thinking about?"

I try to read again, "The water molecule is composed of two atoms of Hydrogen and one of....". "Wait, two of what?", I start over. Time passes.

"BONG, G 131 to window 18, G 131 to window 18, K 242 to windown 43.....". "HEY, THAT"S ME!" I find window 18. "THIS IS IT! MY NEW LICENSE!". It's the guy who verifies your information. He looks like Toulouse-Lautrec.

"Is this your correct address, 20....".

"Yes, sir". I try to be really polite. I don't want to blow it now. He starts typing.

"Is there anything you want to change?"

"No, don't think so."

"Are you sure?", he asks and looks up,raising his little Toulouse-Lautrc eybrows.

"What the **** is that supposed to mean?", I think to myself. I feel like giving him a smart ass answer like, "oh yeah...change the eye color to red". I don't do that. I am lamb-like. I think it was the fentanyl.

He tilts his head as if to say, "well?"

"Oh, OK, put down 190".

He smiles in satisfaction and starts typing again. "Take this to window 37A".

I start off in the direction he indicates. "I let the little cretin win.....what window did he say"?....................



I got my new license in the mail. The picture makes it look like I rubbed Wesson oil on my face. I can't let Stalker Girl see it, not after I made so much fun of her picture.

Your driver license places in California sound like ours in Florida[:D]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

ORIGINAL: timtom

IIRC, Brookie didn't become a Peer until after the war (the beta version that is, preceeding v.1 and the current v.2)

Notice where the PM has his hat. Probably Number 2's transcriptionist is just off camera bending over to collect her papers. [:-]

Hmmmm. What was she wearing?

Bikini-clad women make men impatient

ORIGINAL: BrucePowers

Your driver license places in California sound like ours in Florida[:D]

There is a reason for that;

[:D][:D]

******************SEAC HQ, Ledo, January 16, 1943****************


Gen. Pownall: <at the head of a conference table> Gentleman, I am sure you were wondering why I called you all here today.

Staffer 1: <excitedly> YES! YES I WAS!

Gen. Pownall: Son, that was meant to be rhetorical.

Staffer 1: Oh, sorry sir. It's just that everyone is so excited about the operation.

Gen. Pownall: What operation is that, son?

Staffer 1: Why, Operation, well, you know, sir <winks>

Gen. Pownall: Is there something in your eye, son?

Staffer 1: Oh, no sir, it's just that I didn't know if we could say, well, you know.. <looks anxious>

Gen. Pownall: No I don't know. Perhaps you should tell me as I seem to be the last to know these things.

Staffer 1: <now more anxious, motions toward open door in the back of the room> Sir, I understood this was on a need to know basis.

Gen. Pownall: It is! I need to know what on the bloody Earth you are talking about.

Staffer 1: Sir, it's the door sir.

Gen. Pownall: Do you mean to tell me you interrupted my presentation over the door?

Staffer 1: Oh no sir. I was just wondering if we should close it for security.

Gen. Pownall: Very well. Master Sargeant...see to it. Now, are there any other questions before I resume?

Staffer 2: Sir? <raises hand>

Gen. Pownall: Yes, Colonel.

Staffer 2: Sir, do you recall when you said your comment was meant to "rhetorical"?

Gen. Pownall: Yes, yes I do. I meant no answer was expected to my question.

Staffer 2: Yes sir. That is my point. Your opening remark was more of a declarative statement than a question. It seems redundant to term it "rhetorical".

Staffer 3: I disagree. <stands> One can certainly use a rhetorical style in a declarative statement. Indeed, most rhetorical utterances are declarative.

Staffer 4: I am with the major on this one. The Colonel is using a very narrow definition of "rhetorical". In fact, if you ask me, the phrase "rhetorical question" is a bit hackneyed.

Staffer 2: <indignantly> HACKNEYED! Do you mean worn out by indulgent overuse? I beg to differ.

Staffer 4: Well, sir. I didn't really mean hackneyed in the NEGATIVE sense, only that its use had become a bit....common.

Staffer 2: COMMON? <begins to move toward staffer 4> I'll show you common.

Gen. Pownall: BOOM! <the room grows quiet save for the ringing sound that all in the room now experience. The General returns his pearl-handled 45, a gift from M&M Enterprises Language Services Division, to its holster> Could we all please return to the bloody topic? Where was I? Ah, yes, I was most keen to talk to you all as I have direct orders from the Prime Minister himself..................

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake


"Is there anything you want to change?"

"No, don't think so."

"Are you sure?", he asks and looks up,raising his little Toulouse-Lautrc eybrows.

"What the **** is that supposed to mean?", I think to myself. I feel like giving him a smart ass answer like, "oh yeah...change the eye color to red". I don't do that. I am lamb-like. I think it was the fentanyl.

He tilts his head as if to say, "well?"

"Oh, OK, put down 190".

He smiles in satisfaction and starts typing again. "Take this to window 37A".

Oh my God! I am sure to bust some of my stitches from having my tonsils out last Thursday! [&o]

Cap, I would hate to see what you would turn out if you were ever really bored! [:'(]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

******************SEAC HQ, Ledo, January 16, 1943****************


Gen. Pownall: <at the head of a conference table> Gentleman, I am sure you were wondering why I called you all here today.

Staffer 1: <excitedly> YES! YES I WAS!

Gen. Pownall: Son, that was meant to be rhetorical.

Staffer 1: Oh, sorry sir. It's just that everyone is so excited about the operation.

Gen. Pownall: What operation is that, son?

Staffer 1: Why, Operation, well, you know, sir <winks>

Gen. Pownall: Is there something in your eye, son?

Staffer 1: Oh, no sir, it's just that I didn't know if we could say, well, you know.. <looks anxious>

Gen. Pownall: No I don't know. Perhaps you should tell me as I seem to be the last to know these things.

Staffer 1: <now more anxious, motions toward open door in the back of the room> Sir, I understood this was on a need to know basis.

Gen. Pownall: It is! I need to know what on the bloody Earth you are talking about.

Staffer 1: Sir, it's the door sir.

Gen. Pownall: Do you mean to tell me you interrupted my presentation over the door?

Staffer 1: Oh no sir. I was just wondering if we should close it for security.

Gen. Pownall: Very well. Master Sargeant...see to it. Now, are there any other questions before I resume?

Staffer 2: Sir? <raises hand>

Gen. Pownall: Yes, Colonel.

Staffer 2: Sir, do you recall when you said your comment was meant to "rhetorical"?

Gen. Pownall: Yes, yes I do. I meant no answer was expected to my question.

Staffer 2: Yes sir. That is my point. Your opening remark was more of a declarative statement than a question. It seems redundant to term it "rhetorical".

Staffer 3: I disagree. <stands> One can certainly use a rhetorical style in a declarative statement. Indeed, most rhetorical utterances are declarative.


.....

I was unable to get past Staffer 3, as I had to run to the bathroom and find something to stem the flow of blood from the ruptured stitches on the left side of my throat. [:D]

Oh, good one, Mandrake... way to go... killing your readers off by making them laugh to death... [:'(] [8D]

**********Operation You Know What Steering Committe Mtg., SEAC HQ, Ledo, Jan. 17, 1943***********


Staffer 3: Right, shall we get started then?

Staffer 2: Yes, please let's.

Staffer 3: Splenid!....Oh dear. I am so sorry, please forgive me.

Staffer 1: May I suggest "superb" sir? It is quite natural.

Staffer 3: Superb suggestion, Major! May I have a motion to formally substitute "superb" for you know what as an offical policy of the steering committee?

Staffer 1: So moved.

Staffer 3: May I have a second?

Staffer 1: Seconded!

Staffer 2: One can't second one's own motion. May I suggest we instruct the secretary to substitute "superb" for "you know what" in the official transcripts.

Staffer 3: Superb idea! I'll second that!

Staffer 2: Generally the committe chairman doesn't second motions neither.

Staffer 3: Perhaps, as there are only 3 of us, we could make some allowance?

Staffer 1: Superb! Let's make that a rule!

Staffer 3: Would you care to make a motion to that effect?

Staffer 1: Yes! So moved.

Staffer 2: Colonel, I believe we haven't yet acted on the Major's original motion.

Staffer 3: Would the secretary please read back the minutes commencing from the start of the meeting.........

Okay, five-point harness buckled, crash helmet on, ready to go...[:D]