Matrix Games Forums

ORIGINAL: Lecivius

ORIGINAL: fodder

ORIGINAL: Lecivius

And on another note, 1000 posts!!

Hey, you do know that you got your fourth star for post 1001.

What, no cookie?

ORIGINAL: Symon

Hi Mike.
So there you are, in the Christmas season, with that big tub of Quaker oatmeal, that makes your kids barf unless you load it up with sugar, cinnamon, fruit, etc.. .Prolly makes you barf, too, yeah? So what to do, what to do? Uncle John’s kitchen is here to hep ya.

Uncle John’s Utter Oatmeal Cookies.
1 cup butter (softened)
2 eggs
2 cups flour
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
2 tsp cinnamon
3 cups raw oatmeal
2 tsp “Badia” brand Mexican vanilla**
1 cup “Morena” brand Mexican sugar**
½ cup raisins
4 oz good rum, or brandy, or whiskey

** certain Mexican things are so much better and tastier than our’s. Mexico “owns” sugar refining and vanilla production. You can find them in the Mexican isle of your local supermarket.
Soak (marinate) raisins in booze for 1 hour, or more. They should end up looking a bit plump.
In a medium bowl, cream together butter, and sugar. Beat in eggs one at a time, then stir in vanilla. Combine flour, baking soda, salt, and cinnamon; stir into the creamed mixture. Mix in oats. Add the marinated raisins. Cover, and chill dough for at least one hour.
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F (180 degrees C). Grease cookie sheets. Roll the dough into walnut sized balls, and place 2 inches apart on cookie sheets. Flatten each cookie with a large fork dipped in sugar.
Bake for 8 to 10 minutes in preheated oven. Allow cookies to cool on baking sheet for 5 minutes before transferring to a wire rack to cool completely.

Zut alors, elle est si belle, non, est si savoureuse !!! Ciao. J

ORIGINAL: witpqs

http://distractify.com/fun/fails/test-answers-that-are-totally-wrong-but-still-genius/

My wife translated #19. [:D]

ORIGINAL: USS America

ORIGINAL: witpqs
http://distractify.com/fun/fails/test-answers-that-are-totally-wrong-but-still-genius/

My wife translated #19. [:D]

Some of those are awesome! [:D]

ORIGINAL: Dixie
Kids. Who'd have them?

ORIGINAL: Dixie

Meh tithe. Another week and another reason for Mrs Dixie to be stressed about Baby MkII.

A month ago her bump was too small and the baby could have stopped growing. An 'emergency' trip to the (Not so) local hospital the next day showed that the baby was fine but was sat breach. So two weeks later Mrs D had to go back for another scan to see if Baby MkII had turned, which it hadn't. So they managed to turn the baby around, which gave Mrs D a sore belly for several days. Then she had to go back yesterday to check the baby hadn't turned around again. It's sitting properly still, but they're back to telling us it's stopped growing again, or they buggered up the measurement but they aren't sure which. So now we get to travel back to the hospital on Christmas Eve for yet another scan. If Baby MkII has stopped growing then Mrs D gets cut open for a C-section the day before Christmas [8|] Kids. Who'd have them?

ORIGINAL: Symon

Hi Mike.
So there you are, in the Christmas season, with that big tub of Quaker oatmeal, that makes your kids barf unless you load it up with sugar, cinnamon, fruit, etc.. .Prolly makes you barf, too, yeah? So what to do, what to do? Uncle John’s kitchen is here to hep ya.

Uncle John’s Utter Oatmeal Cookies.
1 cup butter (softened)
2 eggs
2 cups flour
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
2 tsp cinnamon
3 cups raw oatmeal
2 tsp “Badia” brand Mexican vanilla**
1 cup “Morena” brand Mexican sugar**
½ cup raisins
4 oz good rum, or brandy, or whiskey

** certain Mexican things are so much better and tastier than our’s. Mexico “owns” sugar refining and vanilla production. You can find them in the Mexican isle of your local supermarket.
Soak (marinate) raisins in booze for 1 hour, or more. They should end up looking a bit plump.
In a medium bowl, cream together butter, and sugar. Beat in eggs one at a time, then stir in vanilla. Combine flour, baking soda, salt, and cinnamon; stir into the creamed mixture. Mix in oats. Add the marinated raisins. Cover, and chill dough for at least one hour.
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F (180 degrees C). Grease cookie sheets. Roll the dough into walnut sized balls, and place 2 inches apart on cookie sheets. Flatten each cookie with a large fork dipped in sugar.
Bake for 8 to 10 minutes in preheated oven. Allow cookies to cool on baking sheet for 5 minutes before transferring to a wire rack to cool completely.

Zut alors, elle est si belle, non, est si savoureuse !!! Ciao. J

ORIGINAL: Dixie

Meh tithe. Another week and another reason for Mrs Dixie to be stressed about Baby MkII.

A month ago her bump was too small and the baby could have stopped growing. An 'emergency' trip to the (Not so) local hospital the next day showed that the baby was fine but was sat breach. So two weeks later Mrs D had to go back for another scan to see if Baby MkII had turned, which it hadn't. So they managed to turn the baby around, which gave Mrs D a sore belly for several days. Then she had to go back yesterday to check the baby hadn't turned around again. It's sitting properly still, but they're back to telling us it's stopped growing again, or they buggered up the measurement but they aren't sure which. So now we get to travel back to the hospital on Christmas Eve for yet another scan. If Baby MkII has stopped growing then Mrs D gets cut open for a C-section the day before Christmas [8|] Kids. Who'd have them?