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I can never remember the names of the damn things. It is bad enough with South Carolina and North Dakota in the same taffy....or is it......?

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

In a temporary (I hope) fit of insanity, I went to Disneyland yesterday. I had a $200 gift certificate. This proved not enough to get into the park but I was able to buy 2 churros, a diet coke and Mousketeer Hat with "Cap Mandrake" sewn onto it.

For the first time ever, I went on the canoe "ride". It was on my bucket list. We had the most inept group of paddlers that were ever assembled in one place. The poor guide had to pretty much power us around. I tried to help but the chick in front of me was either deaf and missed the cadence or had a severe apraxia. She must have smashed my knuckles 10 times. I finally gave up as did most of the passengers. I figure that guide will need to put in a transfer to the Jungle Cruise before he goes poastal and kills someone because he was really geting pissed. On balance, i would say the Canoe Ride is WAAAY overrated.

Cap Mandrake:

I obviously was not there to share your findings, but are you sure of your diagnosis of 784.69: "Inability to execute complex coordinated movements resulting from lesions in the motor area of the cortex but involving no sensory impairment or paralysis" vs. possibly Ataxia (438.84) "that consists of gross lack of coordination of muscle movements." Typically we associate Aprxia with things like unable to put on one's socks on first and then one's shoes as opposed to describing the fine motor movements of tying ones shoes.

One other possible diagnosis to think about was a panic attack. Panic Attacks can appear as dissassociated symptoms [meaning disassociation between the cortex and limbic system] as you describe. A Panic Attack might be from not being able to swim and you possibly threating to throw her off the boat for example ... or the panic those LYB's will feel when the Swordfish appear on the horizon ....[:'(]

ORIGINAL: Crackaces

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

In a temporary (I hope) fit of insanity, I went to Disneyland yesterday. I had a $200 gift certificate. This proved not enough to get into the park but I was able to buy 2 churros, a diet coke and Mousketeer Hat with "Cap Mandrake" sewn onto it.

For the first time ever, I went on the canoe "ride". It was on my bucket list. We had the most inept group of paddlers that were ever assembled in one place. The poor guide had to pretty much power us around. I tried to help but the chick in front of me was either deaf and missed the cadence or had a severe apraxia. She must have smashed my knuckles 10 times. I finally gave up as did most of the passengers. I figure that guide will need to put in a transfer to the Jungle Cruise before he goes poastal and kills someone because he was really geting pissed. On balance, i would say the Canoe Ride is WAAAY overrated.

Cap Mandrake:

I obviously was not there to share your findings, but are you sure of your diagnosis of 784.69: "Inability to execute complex coordinated movements resulting from lesions in the motor area of the cortex but involving no sensory impairment or paralysis" vs. possibly Ataxia (438.84) "that consists of gross lack of coordination of muscle movements." Typically we associate Aprxia with things like unable to put on one's socks on first and then one's shoes as opposed to describing the fine motor movements of tying ones shoes.

One other possible diagnosis to think about was a panic attack. Panic Attacks can appear as dissassociated symptoms [meaning disassociation between the cortex and limbic system] as you describe. A Panic Attack might be from not being able to swim and you possibly threating to throw her off the boat for example ... or the panic those LYB's will feel when the Swordfish appear on the horizon ....[:'(]

Zis ist true. It could be ze fear zat got her professor. Ze "code brown" situation as you say.

On ze ozer hand, ze patient vas quite skeellfull on ze dock..und...getting out of ze boat. Zees, more zan anyzink makes me zink ve may have a twue, und vewy rare, specific paddling apraxia, disorder, canoe (784.6973). On ze ozer, ozer hand, she may have had
(611.1) Big ****. I vas unable to verify zis ozer diagnois because I vas mit Stalker Frauline.

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

They must be sappers...no Zebra shields.

It really does look like Port Hedland...there is a eucalyptus tree.

I'm pretty sure that photo is set in Kenya - typical bush terrain and it looks like acacia trees in the background.

Port Hedland is very, very flat and featureless - very few trees, in fact. We are talking proper, flat arid desert. It if wasn't for the natural harbour (which still needed significant dredging to make it useful) - and the iron ore - and the salt - it would be insignificant.

And very hot, too - end of October to early November temperatures are well up in the high 30s (Centigrade) and have gone well above 45 degrees Centigrade (record temperature in Dec/Jan was 49 degrees Centigrade (or 120 degrees Fahrenheit)).

Let's just say your pongoes will definitely be working on their tans (even the members of the King's African Rifles!).

I wonder what the market for sunscreen is like in Port Hedland right now?

************Port Hedland, Oct. 28, 1942****************

Pasty-looking British subaltern: (To some local Australians, busy digging a latrine pit) I say, carry on, men.

(Few hours passes)

Pasty-looking British subaltern: Oh, jolly good, I see you're almost finished... [spots the Australian group alternating at urinating into the pit and then appearing to dance in it, barefoot]...By Jove, what the bloody hell are you lot playing at?

Rugged and very tanned man wearing a slouch hat: It's the urine, mate - hardens the feet up a treat!

ORIGINAL: CT Grognard

************Port Hedland, Oct. 28, 1942****************

Pasty-looking British subaltern: (To some local Australians, busy digging a latrine pit) I say, carry on, men.

(Few hours passes)

Pasty-looking British subaltern: Oh, jolly good, I see you're almost finished... [spots the Australian group alternating at urinating into the pit and then appearing to dance in it, barefoot]...By Jove, what the bloody hell are you lot playing at?

Rugged and very tanned man wearing a slouch hat: It's the urine, mate - hardens the feet up a treat!

Ah, splendid! That should solve the problem of 102nd Eng. Bn. hoarding all the boots! Let's hope the level 6 latrine doesn't get confused with the fortifications.

It also provides a convenient scapegoat for your cowardly troops, Allied dogs! They're not wetting themselves in fear of the enemy, they're 'hardening up' their legs and feet for rapid movement. Brilliant marketing coup! [&o]

What will you think up for when they lose voluntary control of their bowels in panic? Providing fertilizer for sustainable local agriculture? [:'(]

Organic rearguard action.

ORIGINAL: Mynok

Organic rearguard action.

[&o][:D]

today's login letters (no Vanna please!) N A Z A L U... my guess? a southern belle born to a German P.O.W. I'm sure you folks can do better! 

ORIGINAL: moore4807

today's login letters (no Vanna please!) N A Z A L U... my guess? a southern belle born to a German P.O.W. I'm sure you folks can do better! 

I think you mean NAZASUE. NAZALU is the imam-approved method for removing unwanted body hair among muslim women. Apparently it involves a loop of string and a well insulated room to muffle the screams....well, that's what I heard.


Heap big surface fight off Port Hedland....more to come.

***************14th Naval Battle of Port Hedland October 28/29*****************


The US fast BB's are virtually unscratched after the air attcks of the 28th. Somerville orders them in to go after the transports.


21:20.............First action is about 40 mi NE of PH at night. Sommerville's force (North Carolina and South Dakota) encounter and promptly sink 2 CM's

21:45.............Dutch sub KX sinks another CM in the same area

22:55.............Somerville, moving SSW, encounters Mutusu and Furataka. Allied radar picks up JJ at 14,000 yds. Somerville manuevers under radar guidance and crosses the enemy "T" at 8,000.


Japanese Ships
BB Mutsu, Shell hits 9, on fire, heavy damage
CA Furutaka, Shell hits 3, on fire
CL Kiso, Shell hits 3
DD Amatsukaze
DD Yamakaze
DD Oboro
DD Yamanagiri

Allied Ships
BB North Carolina, Shell hits 4, Torpedo hits 1
BB South Dakota, Shell hits 3
CA Pensacola, Shell hits 1
CA San Francisco
CL Perth
DD Sims
DD Drayton, Shell hits 24, Torpedo hits 1, and is sunk
DD Smith, Shell hits 1
DD MacDonough, Shell hits 1
DE Pillsbury, Shell hits 2, on fire


Mutsu takes 9 hits, mostly 16 in, but you can hardly call this an Allied victory owing to the loss of one DD and the torpdeo hit to North Carolina

More to come

14th Naval Battle of Port Hedland

at least you dont have to waste time scrolling.[:D]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

***************14th Naval Battle of Port Hedland October 28/29*****************


The US fast BB's are virtually unscratched after the air attcks of the 28th. Somerville orders them in to go after the transports.


21:20.............First action is about 40 mi NE of PH at night. Sommerville's force (North Carolina and South Dakota) encounter and promptly sink 2 CM's

21:45.............Dutch sub KX sinks another CM in the same area

22:55.............Somerville, moving SSW, encounters Mutusu and Furataka. Allied radar picks up JJ at 14,000 yds. Somerville manuevers under radar guidance and crosses the enemy "T" at 8,000.


Japanese Ships
BB Mutsu, Shell hits 9, on fire, heavy damage
CA Furutaka, Shell hits 3, on fire
CL Kiso, Shell hits 3
DD Amatsukaze
DD Yamakaze
DD Oboro
DD Yamanagiri

Allied Ships
BB North Carolina, Shell hits 4, Torpedo hits 1
BB South Dakota, Shell hits 3
CA Pensacola, Shell hits 1
CA San Francisco
CL Perth
DD Sims
DD Drayton, Shell hits 24, Torpedo hits 1, and is sunk
DD Smith, Shell hits 1
DD MacDonough, Shell hits 1
DE Pillsbury, Shell hits 2, on fire


Mutsu takes 9 hits, mostly 16 in, but you can hardly call this an Allied victory owing to the loss of one DD and the torpdeo hit to North Carolina

More to come

How badly damaged is North Carolina? Mutsu's hurt pretty bad. Your guys gave worse than you received...

00:15 (29th).............Somerville steers SE and surprises some Jap transports


Japanese Ships
xAP Hakozaki Maru, Shell hits 4
xAP Kasado Maru, Shell hits 6, heavy fires, heavy damage
xAP Kowa Maru
xAP Palau Maru, Shell hits 3
PB Aso Maru #7, Shell hits 5, and is sunk

Allied Ships
BB North Carolina, Shell hits 1
BB South Dakota, Shell hits 1
CA Pensacola
CA San Francisco, Shell hits 1
CL Perth


DD Sims
DD Smith, heavy damage
DD MacDonough
DE Pillsbury, on fire

Japanese ground losses:
24 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Non Combat: 2 destroyed, 1 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled

00:55.....................Somerville's force (minus the now detached North Carolina) bump into the remants of the main Jap surfce group (minus Mutsu) No radar spotting this time. Maybe somebody broke it. It's Rong Rance range again.

Night Time Surface Combat, near Port Hedland at 57,128, Range 8,000 Yards

Japanese Ships
CA Furutaka, Shell hits 5, on fire
CL Kiso, Shell hits 2, on fire
DD Amatsukaze, Shell hits 9, and is sunk
DD Yamakaze
DD Oboro

Allied Ships
BB South Dakota, Shell hits 2, Torpedo hits 1, on fire
CA Pensacola, Shell hits 1, Torpedo hits 1, on fire
CA San Francisco, Shell hits 1
CL Perth, Shell hits 1
DD Sims, Shell hits 1

Time to go home. It's not fun anymore.

08:20...............The smaller surface group from Exmouth arrives after daybreak and finds easier pickings.

Day Time Surface Combat, near Port Hedland at 57,128, Range 24,000 Yards

Japanese Ships
xAP Hakozaki Maru, Shell hits 33, and is sunk
xAP Kowa Maru, Shell hits 7, Torpedo hits 1, and is sunk
xAP Palau Maru, Shell hits 12, and is sunk

Allied Ships
CA Vincennes
CL Birmingham
DD Laffey
DD Lang
DD Stack


Japanese ground losses:
961 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Non Combat: 39 destroyed, 129 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled


08:55..............The high-piched screams attract predators

Day Time Surface Combat, near Port Hedland at 57,128, Range 26,000 Yards

Japanese Ships
BB Hyuga, Shell hits 9
DD Suzukaze, Shell hits 4, heavy fires
DD Oite
DD Shiokaze, Shell hits 3, and is sunk
DD Yukaze, Shell hits 2, heavy fires
DD Sanae, Shell hits 2, heavy fires, heavy damage

Allied Ships
CA Vincennes, Shell hits 7, heavy fires, heavy damage
CL Birmingham, Shell hits 1
DD Laffey, Shell hits 1
DD Lang, Shell hits 4
DD Stack, Shell hits 3, on fire

Could have been worse. I would say Vincennes acquitted herself well.

Damage to North Carolina

Damage to South Carolina

Post combat intelligence loss estimates: