Page 40 of 178
Disclaimer
Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2007 11:51 pm
by Cap Mandrake
Editor's Note: We are unable to confirm that a B-25C bomb bay is sufficiently capacious to allow a non-Hobbit-sized individual to physically sit on a bomb. For this reason, the true fate of Professor Tolkien remains in doubt. We have requested his records from USDF&W under a FOIA request but are advised there is a six month delay. It seems to have something to do with Federal Employees Union rules re. LGBT sensitivty training.
RE: Disclaimer
Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2007 11:58 pm
by AU Tiger_MatrixForum
ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
Editor's Note: We are unable to confirm that a B-25C bomb bay is sufficiently capacious to allow a non-Hobbit-sized individual to physically sit on a bomb. For this reason, the true fate of Professor Tolkien remains in doubt. We have requested his records from USDF&W under a FOIA request but are advised there is a six month delay. It seems to have something to do with Federal Employees Union rules re. LGBT sensitivty training.
A simple matter of transposition to change a B-25 into a B-52.
RE: Snail Darter Clusters
Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2007 11:59 pm
by qgaliana
ORIGINAL: AU Tiger
Why do I find myself thinking of Slim Pickens all of a sudden?
I've learned to stop worrying and love WITP [:D]
RE: Snail Darter Clusters
Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2007 12:00 am
by Cap Mandrake
ORIGINAL: AU Tiger
Why do I find myself thinking of Slim Pickens all of a sudden?
You mean like this?
RE: Many birds headed Auckland
Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2007 12:02 am
by qgaliana
ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
Speaker: ...Hey, these fish eggs are pretty good but I cant get the smell off my fingers. ...
Someone's been watching a Peter Sellers marathon, or maybe that was me and I just see him everywhere[:D]
RE: Snail Darter Clusters
Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2007 12:04 am
by Cap Mandrake
This ONE is absolutely hilarious:
"NUCLEAR WARHEAD HANDLE WITH CARE" [:D][:D]
Note that a B-25 is just like a B-52 with the numbers switched. [X(]
RE: Snail Darter Clusters
Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2007 12:05 am
by AU Tiger_MatrixForum
[:D][:D][:D]
'Tis a STRANGE LOVE I have for this thread.
RE: Snail Darter Clusters
Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2007 2:27 am
by rtrapasso
Hey, this IS being written by (Group) Captain Mandrake, after all... [8D]
Intel
Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2007 3:39 pm
by Cap Mandrake
***********A Command Vehicle of Australia Command, pulled over to the side of the highway as the rest of the column passes, June 5, 1942**********
OOD: <speaking to courier with sidecar motorcycle> You had best get this to General Blamey staright away. They can pass along to SWPac, SOUTHPac and Eastern Fleet. Hudsons from Derby report 4 escort carriers and 130+ ships at Koepeang. At least 2 squadrons Zeroes as well. Right, on your way them.
Who's on first?
Posted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 10:51 am
by tabpub
And yet another vignette from the team of Mandrake and Tabpub; looking more like Abbot and Costello everyday....
Just as a note, S-23 reported torpedoing the TK Kamasomthing Maru that day......so even blind squirrels find a TK once in a while.....
On the lighter side of the news, the first returnees from Pago Pago arrived at SF; the 2nd Marine Division arrived at Camp Fuggetaboutit today by truck.....and when I say truck, I mean singular truck. Watch here for about a year to hear of their triumphant return to the ranks of the fighting forces.....
RE: Who's on first?
Posted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 3:59 pm
by Cap Mandrake
[:D]
Such are the problems of command and control at command boundaries. I really don't know how that lonely S-boat got sent to Rabaul..or how an Army Lt. was given command, but Lt. Kiser did pretty well for himself. What are the odds a TK would show up at Rabaul just then? He could have a good career ahead of him if he isn't prone to seasickness.
Funny how the Japs never seem to have any problems like this, eh?
2nd Marine
Posted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 4:08 pm
by Cap Mandrake
**********Mess Hall, Camp Fuggetaboutit, June 8, 1942*************
The mess sargeant beams proudly as 15 huge kettles of creamed, chipped beef are wheeled into the service area. Behind them are arrayed at least a dozen steam cabinets filled with thousands of pieces of toast (or at least they used to be toast). The effort has taken 6 hrs of preparation for a crew of 20, but no effort should be spared for the heroic defenders of Pago Pago. 12 Marines enter the mess hall.
First Marine: Sargeant, I think you may have too much food.
Mess Sargeant: But we were told to expect the 2nd Marine Division!
First Marine: You got it.
RE: 2nd Marine
Posted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 5:12 pm
by USSAmerica
Can we get a screen shot of the 2nd with one squad? [:D]
RE: 2nd Marine
Posted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 7:54 pm
by AU Tiger_MatrixForum
SOS for the SOL division.
RE: 2nd Marine
Posted: Tue Apr 03, 2007 2:22 am
by Cap Mandrake
ORIGINAL: USS America
Can we get a screen shot of the 2nd with one squad? [:D]
Good news! USS Cachalot just pulled in with another 20 and a couple of 81 mm mortars! Woohoo!
They are in remarkable spirits cosidering theri ordeal and the stuff they are feeding them at
Camp Fuggetaboutit. Looks like Vandergrif didn't get out. [:(]
RE: 2nd Marine
Posted: Tue Apr 03, 2007 2:41 am
by bradfordkay
I thought that Vandegrift was CO 1st Marine Div.
RE: 2nd Marine
Posted: Tue Apr 03, 2007 3:22 am
by USSAmerica
Wow, 97 experience! [X(]
Extreme example of Darwinism? [:D]
Temporary Insanity
Posted: Tue Apr 03, 2007 6:20 pm
by Cap Mandrake
ORIGINAL: USS America
Wow, 97 experience! [X(]
Extreme example of Darwinism? [:D]
[:D]
Slightly off topic, but I have a legal question. Let's say, for the sake of discussion, you are inadvisably in a charity golf tournament even though you play golf once or twice a year. Now, further imagine, you arrive late and don't get a chance to hit any practice shots and, indeed have to put your golf shoes on while the cart is moving. Now, further, imagine, you are on the second hole and a guy with a big belly with stretch marks you can see when he raises his arms shows up with a professional digital camera and announces he is making a video of the tournament to be distributed to the players on DVD. Now, further imagine, in some kind of sadistic macho purgatory you are playing from the pro tees and, on the second hole you have to fly the ball about 220-230 yds in the air to clear a massive bunker and rattlesnake nursery. Now, imagine, as I, I mean you, tee up the ball, the fat videographer is 6 feet away taping everything and your heart is going at about 180 beats per minute because you know you are going to have to hit this flush and give it a full backswing or you are going to be rattlesnake bait. "OK..take a couple of cleansing breaths", you say. Adjust your feet a couple of milimeters and wiggle your clubhead. Take a practice swing. "Hey, that felt pretty good!" "OK, this it it!" A breeze comes up. A tailwind, no less. "Cool...a good omen". Time slows. The clubhead starts up. Good shoulder rotation. "That'll look cool on the video!" "Whoa, is that the clubhead in your left peripheral vision?" "I (you) am a freaking John Daly!". Down comes the club. "Keep your head down". "Whooosh".
The ball trickles off the tee and stops about 6 inches away.
"I GOT IT! I CAUGHT EVERYTHING IN FRAME", cries the videographer!
OK. Here is the legal question. Has the temporary insanity defence ever been used successfully for an assault with a deadly weapon case during a gold touma,emt?
RE: Temporary Insanity
Posted: Tue Apr 03, 2007 6:43 pm
by rockmedic109
As long as the Judge and prosecutor are golfers, you are ok.
You might try claiming that you cannot be charged with ADW because the guy was dead before you hit him: Anybody that stupid doesn't have the brainpower to take a breath. Might get the charges dropped to Misdemeanor Corpse Defilement.
RE: Temporary Insanity
Posted: Tue Apr 03, 2007 6:45 pm
by AU Tiger_MatrixForum
I don't know if it has been used in the past, but as to your chances:
If you live in Orange County, it will be an obvious case of justifiable assault, but you may get some time for not actually killing the guy.
If you live in L.A. county, I am afraid you are destined for Pelican Bay because you are obviously the ring-leader for an elitist country club gang who reacted with violence when a blue-collar card-carrying union member trespassed on your turf.
If it is the latter case, I hope you petition for internet privileges during your incarceration, I don't want this AAR to end.
ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
ORIGINAL: USS America
Wow, 97 experience! [X(]
Extreme example of Darwinism? [:D]
[:D]
Slightly off topic, but I have a legal question. Let's say, for the sake of discussion, you are inadvisably in a charity golf tournament even though you play golf once or twice a year. Now, further imagine, you arrive late and don't get a chance to hit any practice shots and, indeed have to put your golf shoes on while the cart is moving. Now, further, imagine, you are on the second hole and a guy with a big belly with stretch marks you can see when he raises his arms shows up with a professional digital camera and announces he is making a video of the tournament to be distributed to the players on DVD. Now, further imagine, in some kind of sadistic macho purgatory you are playing from the pro tees and, on the second hole you have to fly the ball about 220-230 yds in the air to clear a massive bunker and rattlesnake nursery. Now, imagine, as I, I mean you, tee up the ball, the fat videographer is 6 feet away taping everything and your heart is going at about 180 beats per minute because you know you are going to have to hit this flush and give it a full backswing or you are going to be rattlesnake bait. "OK..take a couple of cleansing breaths", you say. Adjust your feet a couple of milimeters and wiggle your clubhead. Take a practice swing. "Hey, that felt pretty good!" "OK, this it it!" A breeze comes up. A tailwind, no less. "Cool...a good omen". Time slows. The clubhead starts up. Good shoulder rotation. "That'll look cool on the video!" "Whoa, is that the clubhead in your left peripheral vision?" "I (you) am a freaking John Daly!". Down comes the club. "Keep your head down". "Whooosh".
The ball trickles off the tee and stops about 6 inches away.
"I GOT IT! I CAUGHT EVERYTHING IN FRAME", cries the videographer!
OK. Here is the legal question. Has the temporary insanity defence ever been used successfully for an assault with a deadly weapon case during a gold touma,emt?