Matrix Games Forums

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
Now, I can't say for sure I would let the orthopedists off the hook

That's a good point. They do have some excellent titanium screws and pins that would do a magnificent job at cutting / etching other metals. Plus they're the cavemen of the physician world. HIT LEG WITH HAMMER! URGH!

Jelous (tm) much? [8|]

ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
Now, I can't say for sure I would let the orthopedists off the hook

That's a good point. They do have some excellent titanium screws and pins that would do a magnificent job at cutting / etching other metals. Plus they're the cavemen of the physician world. HIT LEG WITH HAMMER! URGH!

Jelous (tm) much? [8|]

The ones I've known are nice enough guys, but they're definitely the mechanical engineers of medicine. You've got to have a certain upper body strength (honest!) to do some of the things they do with big, important parts of people (arms, legs, backs, etc.). I am Jelous (tm) of some of their toys though-sweet stuff.

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy



That's a good point. They do have some excellent titanium screws and pins that would do a magnificent job at cutting / etching other metals. Plus they're the cavemen of the physician world. HIT LEG WITH HAMMER! URGH!

Jelous (tm) much? [8|]

The ones I've known are nice enough guys, but they're definitely the mechanical engineers of medicine. You've got to have a certain upper body strength (honest!) to do some of the things they do with big, important parts of people (arms, legs, backs, etc.). I am Jelous (tm) of some of their toys though-sweet stuff.

From what I've we all have most of their toys in our garage or tool box.

I don't know if I told this yoke. I might reveal my senility but, mercifully, I will sooon forget that I have done so.





An internist, a psychiatrist and an orthopedic surgeon are out duck hunting.

First duck flies over. The internest stands up.

"Probable duck, rule out goose, rule out chicken. I'd like to order some labs, an MRI, a Holter, an EEG, a pH study and some stool tests." BOOM...duck falls from sky

Second duck flies over. The psychiatrist stands up.

"Avian Seasonal Affective Disorder. I'm afraid our time is up. Please check with the receptionist for a 4 1/2 minute follow-up next week and try some of these" BOOM

Third duck flies over. The orthopedist stands up.

BOOM. "What was that?"

Air losses...most of the Emperor's toys were lost over China or Lautem

***********Hill 104, overlooking Changsha, China, Jan 30, 1943(c)**********

Lt. Gen Hop Sing: Hory Ponderosa. Mistah Cahtlight going to be vely, vely angly.

Morning Air attack on Changsha , at 82,52

Weather in hex: Moderate rain

Raid spotted at 16 NM, estimated altitude 7,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 4 minutes

Japanese aircraft
Ki-21-IIa Sally x 13



No Japanese losses



Manpower hits 29
Fires 16243

Aircraft Attacking:
13 x Ki-21-IIa Sally bombing from 5000 feet
City Attack: 4 x 250 kg GP Bomb



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Morning Air attack on Changsha , at 82,52

Weather in hex: Moderate rain

Raid spotted at 40 NM, estimated altitude 8,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 11 minutes

Japanese aircraft
Ki-48-IIa Lily x 15



No Japanese losses



Manpower hits 48
Fires 26856

Aircraft Attacking:
15 x Ki-48-IIa Lily bombing from 4000 feet
City Attack: 4 x 100 kg GP Bomb

***************Pranning*************

Manado: Naval bombardment of Manado tonight. 4 understrength squadrons of B-17's move to Saumlaki in order to attack Manado. Weather permitting, P-38's will sweep over Manado from Kai-Elanden. The most forward airfields (Ternate, Boela and Namlea) are lacking support and supplies for the P-38's. There are 170+ assault points at Manado. I think we will have to land at the little dot hex to the SW and march in with two regiments. They are on their way.

Ternate: RCT landing today with cover from the carriers. Aviation support flying in from Namlea. PT boats moving to Ternate. P-39's and P-40 fly in to Ternate to provide CAP. Fast tranpsort APD's landing supplies at Ternate.

This is the MO. Suppress large JJ airfields with heavies. Capture ungarrisoned airfield via paradrop. Land a regiment of Marines or GI's. Fly in fighters. PT boats for security. Build. Lather, rinse, repeat.

If there are no surprises, the two USN CV's will return tomorrow to Sydney for upgrades before the Sumatra landings.

Lather, rinse, repeat

Frawress pranning.[:D]

The United States Poastal Service delivered my neighbor's Cialis prescription yesterday....to my house. I opened the opaque plastic bag thinking it was one of SG's psych medicines. [:D][:D]

Poor bastard probably had a big weekend planned. As I, of course, had no need for it, I was keen to get it to him, but this presents a problem. I taped up the bag but he is bound to spot the tape. Should I tell him or just let him wonder who opened it? I don't know which is worse.


10:1 he doesn't show up at the next neighborhood BBQ when somebody shows off their new 20,000 BTU grill (about two years before the divorce that he doesn't even know he is having yet).

OK...the die is cast. I put it in his mailbox with no note. Hope he isnt the paranoid type.

Hands up who had to look up Cialis on the net to get the joke <Holds hand up>

He said up and Cialis in the same sentence. Hurr, hurr

remember 4 hour rule!

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

The United States Poastal Service delivered my neighbor's Cialis prescription yesterday....to my house. I opened the opaque plastic bag thinking it was one of SG's psych medicines. [:D][:D]

Poor bastard probably had a big weekend planned. As I, of course, had no need for it, I was keen to get it to him, but this presents a problem. I taped up the bag but he is bound to spot the tape. Should I tell him or just let him wonder who opened it? I don't know which is worse.


10:1 he doesn't show up at the next neighborhood BBQ when somebody shows off their new 20,000 BTU grill (about two years before the divorce that he doesn't even know he is having yet).

Should have given it to Pinhead. [:D]

Priapism.

ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo

Should have given it to Pinhead. [:D]

Pinhead is a bitch..quite literally. Plus, she is jumpy about medicines after that bad experience she had with that bottle of Mylanta.

ORIGINAL: sprior

He said up and Cialis in the same sentence. Hurr, hurr

[:D]

ORIGINAL: Itdepends

Hands up who had to look up Cialis on the net to get the joke <Holds hand up>

It may be called different brand names in different places. The same drug reps (salespeole) that market Cialis here market an androgen(testosterone-like) skin patch. 15 years ago, 85% of the drug reps were really good looking young women. Now the FDA and the AMA (and that bastard Micahel Moore) have ruined the fun and the rules for marketing have been tightened up. They can't even bring pens now. It is really pitiful. Now it is a tray of Rubios fish tacos and a liter bottle of Diet Coke. The drug companies have tightened their belts with the recession so they fired the junior people (the good loking ones) and kept on the older gals and the guys.

The Cialis girls, on the other hand, retain their youthful vigor. Random luck, eh? I went up(stairs) to get some fish tacos on my 15 minute lunch and it struck me as funny that they were selling an androgen patch and Cialis. I suggested a combined product. I even suggested a brand name "Readyandable". They smiled politely.

Here is the important safety tip. Never, ever try to make a sexual joke or even an oblique innuendo to a Cialis girl. They will have heard it and you will appear the doddering old fool. Just take the free fish tacos and say thank you ma'am.

***********August 20, 2012(a {I think})***********


Trauma in the Mandrake household.

1) They stopped serving Sunday brunch with the 21 ingredient Bloody Marys with a prawn the size of a lobster and a balcony so you could people and car and dog watch at Rokin' Fish in Laguna [:@]*

2) They stopped serving the cheese and pea ravioli dish with the roasted prosciuto and mushroom sauce at the bistro we go. [:@]

I blame George Bush.


* The balcony is not part of the Bloody Mary but I didn't want to start a whole new sentence.