Matrix Games Forums

Spouse attack on Computer Room at 11:56 pm

Wife's Force
Wagging Fingers x 1
Stamping Feet x 2
Angry Looks x 15
House Chores x 34
Ultimatums x 1

Scouter's Force
Eye Rolls x 5
Sheepish Grins x 3
Lame Excuses x 11


Wife's Force Losses
Wagging Finger x 1 ignored
Stamping Feet x 2 ignored
House Chores x 17 put off
Angry Looks x 3 avoided

Scouter's Force Losses
Eye Rolls x 3 spotted
Sheepish Grins x 1 ignored
Lame Excuses x 11 shot down


RADM Scouters of SWPAC bails out and is IN THE DOGHOUSE


Scouters Forces
Excessive Computer Time, torpedoed, on fire, going down, no survivors

What's that I hear in the background? A lone trumpeter playing taps?

excellent.. my excuses got slaughtered right on the flight deck. tried to send the kids out on a "wife search", but they were unable to locate the target because they were set to--Retirement Allowed--and found the jungljim are more interesting target.

Hi, Scouters I think you might have the difficulty factor set too high.

Hi

Best AAR so far

Not a bad AAR...happens to all of us at one time or another. Fortunately for me my kids are grown and gone now and gamers themselves...and my ex...well...she's an ex:) So for the last decade I have been abe to play to my hearts content. As for my current gf...I think my 2 german shephards are more computer literate than she is. At least they know when the UV music comes on they go lay down and leave me alone unles it's an extreme emergency...and when I log off...well...they both jump up. My gf has no clue though...and I hope to keep it that way...hehe.

Andy

Love it, very funny!

Scouters, I'd send an SAR your way, but they refuse due to the x10 Angry Looks and multiple chores unaccounted for.

Sorry, you're on your own. Look at it this way: they'll name a ship after you...

I think the lame excuses should be beefed up in the patch. They NEVER get through!

... and don't tell me this is historically correct!

Hartmann

The Lame Excuse From Jane's Book of Household weapons

"The Lame Excuse invented by Bork circa 45000BC and now produced without license world wide has been employed in countless conflicts. The male Version has proven to be easily shot down, turned aside or ignored. The female version has enjoyed a near perfect record for avoiding rebuttals, obvious truths and possessiing a much higher evasion rating then the male model."

Far too close to home at times.

Regards,

- Erik

I think the Ultimatum is overrated. Well into the scenario, you get to use the Call Bluff, which has better firepower and a terrific bomb load. You can't use them very much as there are no replacements. But, if you do shoot down the Ultimatums with one, you aren't likely to see another Ultimatum again for several months.

bribed wife, dog asleep, kids grown, games running fine, Life is Great

Hmmm...

Maybe I should be happy that I'm a single...

Roland

I think the Ultimatum is overrated. Well into the scenario, you get to use the Call Bluff, which has better firepower and a terrific bomb load. You can't use them very much as there are no replacements. But, if you do shoot down the Ultimatums with one, you aren't likely to see another Ultimatum again for several months.

Unfortunately if your call bluff fails to penetrate it results in immediate Auto Victory (although I guess it's arguable which side gets the win )

Personally, I think the house chores are a real drag. Why can't they be left to the AI? I'm supposed to be the theater commander after all, dammit!

Hartmann

AI = spouse:)

Originally posted by Sabre21
AI = spouse:)

Award that man a medal!

Hartmann

Originally posted by Sabre21
AI = spouse:)

Yes, but the UV AI does what you expect within its limits. The spouse has a much better fuzzy logic and 'on the fly' prioritisation routine. I find mine works on a complex system of non-linear goal based scoring, known as Brownie Points.
- bunch of flowers = 1 pt
- 2 or more bunches = 1 pt
- doing housework = 1 pt
- forgetting anniversary etc = -1000pts

A score of at least +1 is required at all times, otherwise deployment of the Heavy Sarcasm will ensue on hearing the computer fire up. (You know the Heavy Sarcasm Mk1 - thats the one with the firing signature that goes "you care more about that computer than you do about me...")

Still, the Spouse AI is MUCH more versatile when I want to stop playing UV!;)

"you care more about that computer than you do about me...")

Hi The man who invents the defense against this weapon will go down in history. There will be an annual prize (like the Nobel) given in his honor. Statues will be erected. Web pages (shrines) will multiply. He will be the hero of generations..............