Murphy's Law of Combat (filched and stolen from everywhere)
Sorry this is so long but thought you would all enjoy.
Friendly fire, isn’t.
Recoilless Rifles, aren’t.
Suppressive fire, doesn’t.
You are not superman, (Marines take note).
A sucking chest wound is nature’s way of telling you to slow down.
If it’s stupid, but it works; it isn’t stupid.
Try to look unimportant, the enemy may be low on ammo.
If at first you don’t succeed, call in Ortillery.
If you are forward of your position, your artillery will fall short.
Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself.
Never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself.
Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.
If your attack is going really well, it’s an ambush.
The enemy diversion you are ignoring, is his main attack.
No plan ever survives contact with the enemy.
There is no such thing as a perfect plan.
There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole.
A retreating enemy is just falling back and regrouping.
The important things are always simple, the simple one’s always hard.
The easy way is always mined.
Teamwork is essential, it gives the enemy other people to shoot at.
Don’t look conspicuous, it draws fire.
Never draw fire it irritates your neighbors.
If you are short of everything except the enemy, you are in the combat zone.
When you have secured the area, make sure the enemy knows this too.
Incoming fire has right of way.
No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.
No inspection ready unit has ever passed combat.
If the enemy is in range so are you.
The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
Things which must be shipped as a set, aren’t.
Things that work together, can’t be carried that way.
Comms fail as soon as you need fire support.
Sensors only fail at night or in bad visibility.
Anything you do can get you killed including doing nothing.
Make it too tough for the enemy to get in, and you won’t be able to get out.
Tracer works both ways.
If you take more than your fair number of objectives, you will get more than your fair number of objectives.
The enemy inevitably attacks on 2 occasions: when he is ready, when you aren't.
5 second fuses burn for 3 seconds.
When both sides are convinced they are about to lose, they're both right.
Professional soldiers are predictable, the universe is full of dangerous amateurs.
Military intelligence is a contradiction.
Fortify your front and your rear will get shot up.
Weather isn't neutral.
If you can't remember the claymore is pointed towards you.
Air defence motto; shoot em down, sort them out on the ground.
The cavalry doesn't always come to the rescue.
Napalm is an area support weapon.
Mines are equal opportunity weapons.
Sniper's motto; reach out and touch someone.
Killing for peace is like screwing for virginity.
The one item you really need is always in short supply.
Interchangeable parts, aren't.
It's not the one with your name on it; it's the one addressed "to whom it may concern" you've got to worry about.
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peter@myhelliconia.freeserve.co.uk
http://www.myhelliconia.freeserve.co.uk