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Well, it was nice Knowing me.........

Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2001 9:23 am
by Hetz(er)
In a fit of Hubris approaching the level of madness the aged and doddering Adolf Hetz(er)today invaded Czerkastalinist Russia. Blindly ordering his troops about in seemingly random and arbitrary patterns the soon to be Ex-Fascist Leader of Germany was able to so confuse the Totalitarian Horde as to inflict the following casualities: 378/4317
140/2254
8/2881
208/5990
Comrade Czerkastalin when asked about this seemingly lop-sided opening to what appears to be an ugly and brutish war replied that the "Forces of Communisum had united and were only playing POSSUM to lure the Facists to their doom".

Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2001 2:54 pm
by czerpak
Originally posted by Hetz:
In a fit of Hubris approaching the level of madness the aged and doddering Adolf Hetz(er)today invaded Czerkastalinist Russia. Blindly ordering his troops about in seemingly random and arbitrary patterns the soon to be Ex-Fascist Leader of Germany was able to so confuse the Totalitarian Horde as to inflict the following casualities: 378/4317
140/2254
8/2881
208/5990
Comrade Czerkastalin when asked about this seemingly lop-sided opening to what appears to be an ugly and brutish war replied that the "Forces of Communisum had united and were only playing POSSUM to lure the Facists to their doom".

welcome to Russia, Adolf Hetz. You gonna love our winter, if you survive that long (remember Poles, Napoleon, Wehrmacht and many others).
Maciej

Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2001 7:59 am
by Hetz(er)
The 2nd week of the annual summer Blitzkrieg has seen huge gains by the Axis. Soviet casualties are estimated at:
9167
5303
4652
5990
On a more somber note our Fuherererer Adolph
Hetz(ler) is undergoing treatment for a sprained ankle suffered during an effort to beat his previous record for the victory jig.

Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2001 8:59 am
by Lokioftheaesir
Originally posted by Hetz:
In a fit of Hubris approaching the level of madness the aged and doddering Adolf Hetz(er)today invaded Czerkastalinist Russia. Blindly ordering his troops about in seemingly random and arbitrary patterns the soon to be Ex-Fascist Leader of Germany was able to so confuse the Totalitarian Horde as to inflict the following casualities: 378/4317
140/2254
8/2881
208/5990
Comrade Czerkastalin when asked about this seemingly lop-sided opening to what appears to be an ugly and brutish war replied that the "Forces of Communisum had united and were only playing POSSUM to lure the Facists to their doom".

A.Het(zer)

I warned you not to but you just would'nt listen.
Now that you've got us stuck in this mud pie at least believe me when i say to 'crush as much soviet armour as possible!!

Heinrich Himmloki

Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2001 9:10 am
by Lokioftheaesir
Originally posted by czerpak:


welcome to Russia, Adolf Hetz. You gonna love our winter, if you survive that long (remember Poles, Napoleon, Wehrmacht and many others).
Maciej

Iosif Vissarionovich

May the righteous forces of marxism prevail!!
(while singing lustily and drinking vodka)

Nick aka Loki Beira

Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2001 9:51 am
by Hetz(er)
LOL <img src="smile.gif" border="0">

Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2001 5:01 pm
by loveman
stalin await the foolhardy who venture into this collossal land.

Posted: Wed Dec 26, 2001 11:21 am
by Hetz(er)
Due to circumstances beyond my current level of competence ze var againzt ze dreadful forzez of Comunizumum haz been restarted with ze followink rezultzzzz:
4455
2285
2859
5689
Death to ze Red Tyrant und all of ze mizguided foolz zat zerve him.

A. Hetz(ler)

Albert Speer today announced that a treaty has been signed between the 3rd Reich and the Innuit.
The terms of the treaty seem to involve the loan to the Innuit of a number of U-Boats to aid in whale hunting with the Innuit agreeing to send an equal number of Shamans to Germany to provide weather control magics to aid in the upcoming winter campaign. When asked for his opinion of this Winston Churchill was for once, speechless.
London Times 30

Posted: Thu Dec 27, 2001 2:38 pm
by czerpak
Due to some unforeseen reasons ( technical problems with misswaping maps) german forces withdrew. But then they come again next day...

Posted: Fri Dec 28, 2001 8:40 am
by Hetz(er)
Hey, they restart races all the time <img src="smile.gif" border="0">

Herr Goebels today announced that the 3rd Reichs research into alternate history travel to be a complete success. As proof of this he unveiled the casuality lists for week 2/3 of the annual German summer rape/pillage and blitzkrieg to be:
10162
4405
4816
6001

(are you sure that you call this scenario giving the russians a break?)

Posted: Sat Dec 29, 2001 9:38 am
by Hetz(er)
In breaking news A. Hetz(ler) was reportedly seen wandering around the general staff War Room muttering "which way did he go, which way did he go?" to himself. Herr Goebels dismissed this as being caused by the Fuhrererers having watched too many bugs bunny cartoons the night before.
11026
05113
05140
06001

Posted: Sun Dec 30, 2001 12:15 am
by Hetz(er)
A. Hetz(ler) today announced that two panzer corps commanders had been shot for cowardice after failing to capture their respective cities.
He did however, promise that their speedy and fair trials would be held no later than next tuesday.
12425
05284
05618
06001

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2002 10:04 pm
by Hetz(er)
A. Hetz(ler) today set a new personal best in the rant, gibber and froth today. The souless totalitarian beast Czerkastalin has apparently decided to defend himself by forming a line running from Kiev to Leningrad which Hetz(ler)'s panzers are finding to be tougher than anticipated.

We would like to post this weeks scores in the hotly contested competition but unfortunately Mr. Himmler has just had our on scene correspondent shot.

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2002 11:09 pm
by Hetz(er)
Hey, Oh dear and esteemed opponent, are you gonna make me do ALL the work?

Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2002 8:39 pm
by loveman
it is nearly time for herr hetz destruction.

Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2002 11:17 pm
by Hetz(er)
Yeah, but you're just saying that because it's true <img src="smile.gif" border="0">

Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2002 2:07 pm
by Hetz(er)
Apparently on Berlin reporter was able to get his latest column off before running afoul of Mr. Himmler. The current standings as of this week in the Blitz, Bomb and Bully are as follows:
1236
0490
0106
0368

14003
05727
06544
06001

Mr. Hetz(ler)'s reply to Czerkastalinist threats of a counterattack is as follows: "Yo Moma was a Capitalist" <img src="smile.gif" border="0">

Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2002 11:58 am
by Hetz(er)
A. Hetz(ler) was unavailable for comment today after the results of this weeks summer slash, burn and pillage were released. Reports of screams of rage comming from the ReichsMinisty were dissmissed as cries of jubilation by Mr. Goebbels.
1985
0766
0242
0405

15609
06060
07407
06001

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2002 2:35 pm
by czerpak
Kremlin, Moscow
we have read all the Nazi lies so far and finally decided to tell the whole civilized world the true and only true :
1. It is true that despite pacts we had sign with Adolf Hetzer he (because of some mental defect, we suppose) invaded our peaceloving nation.
2. All other facts he wrote on this forum are false.
Red Army is well prepared for war and much bigger then opponent.
In fact I ordered my troops to withdraw and avoid fighting, but thats only because we love peace, so here is proposal for Adolf Hetzer :
we wont crush Germany and sign peace treaty if Germany withdraws now and for compensation Soviet Union will get : former Poland, Hungary, Romania, former Czech, Norway, free hand to seize Finland and Italy. Germans can do whatever they want with France, England, USA and Bangladesh.
3. Soviet losses showed by Hetzer are just product of his imagination.
We didnt loose any tanks or planes. The numbers showed by Germans are just obsolete tanks and planes which were used for training purposes only, so they were left when we were withdrawing.
4. Our new defense line is strong and stable.
5. German blitzkrieg ( thats how they call it) is very slow indeed, because we are able to withdraw faster then they are advancing.

Maciej Czerpak Stalin

Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2002 3:11 am
by Hetz(er)
Adolph Hetzer was released from the hospital today after intestinal surgery to repair damage caused by a fit of laughter brought on by reading Mr. Czerkastalin's peace treaty. The damage is not thought to be serious and Mr. Hetzer is expected regain his usual calm and thoughful self
control in no more than 8-10 years.
The ReichsMinistry today published a counter-proposal saying that the Germans are a piece loving people and would be quite willing to settle for their current territorial gains with a "little something for their effort" saying that they would gladly allow Mr. Czerkastalin to retain Sakalin Island.

Results for this summer's Snatch, Grab and Plunder are as follows:
2836
1084
0449
0457

18633
06435
08620
06001