Official Dare!!!!

[Goblin]

Since Bernie and Mogami enjoy beating the tar out of me, and since they are, in fact, two of the funniest people here, I DARE them to have a go at it! PBEM game, results posted here, under 'Official Dare!!!!'. Well guys?

Goblin- A Goblin instigates:p

[mogami]

OK if he wants to send me a PBEM game. I'll take the Ruuussouns
After 1943

[Bernie]

Originally posted by Mogami
OK if he wants to send me a PBEM game. I'll take the Ruuussouns
After 1943

You got it...

Meeting engagement Jan of '44

Same rules I use with Goblin, C&C off, true troop on/rarity off, no strike elements, limited ammo on, historic on, nat. char. on, weapon & vehicle breakdowns on.

Day, dawn, dusk or night? Moon?

Terrain preference?

[mogami]

Hi, you pick em, ask Goblin I always let him do whatever he wants on setup. I adapt to whatever.

[Bernie]

Originally posted by Mogami
Hi, you pick em, ask Goblin I always let him do whatever he wants on setup. I adapt to whatever.

Okay, all set. Just send me your email and I'll ship 'em over to you.

[Goblin]

Originally posted by Mogami
Hi, you pick em, ask Goblin I always let him do whatever he wants on setup. I adapt to whatever.

Don't ask me, I am still sorting thru the four page list of rules he sent me for our game!:D

Goblin- A Goblin hates red tape

[M4Jess]

Official Dare!!!! ????

I seen that somewhere before.....................................

M4= a M4 can jidder-bug

[Bernie]

Okay, Mogami chose the Soviets post 1943.

I've setup the battle as follows:

Turns 35
Visibility 18
Date Jan 1944


We'll be using Wild Bills "Pacific - Villages" map.

Why the Pacific when Mogami is fighting as the Soviets you ask?

Because, in honor of the Goblin vs Mogami Japanese Sci-Fi Movie battle I've chosen to take on the role of one of the Soviets historic enemies...the Japanese.

BANZAI!

[mogami]

The Soviet Union declared war on Japan today the official news release. Foreign minister Molotov:

"Comrades as the glorious Red Army advances toward Berlin and the defeat of the fascist invaders. Comrade Stalin has decided the time has come to lend assistance to our American allies bogged down in their war against Japan. To aid in this war against millions of Japanese soldiers I have dispatched Comrade Colonel Mogami with his elite 5079th Guards Infantry Bn.
We hope to rid the world of the horrible future of Japanese motorcycles, washing machines and bad movies. We wish instead a bright future of Russian motorcycles, washing machines and bad movies. Russia will regain her lead as the worlds great whaling nation. Russia will avenge her defeat of 1902 and add the Korean peninsula and the nation of Japan to our Soviet family of nations. (And get the illustrious 5079th Guards Infantry Bn out of Russia) This unit is hand picked from throughout the entire mighty Red Army. Colonel Mogami has a combat record without parallel among Soviet officers. We excpect an immediate drop in drunkness and desertion thourghout the front, wait I mean we expect this glourius unit to record new deeds in the growing legend of the victouries Red Army, Good Luck Colonel Mogami and good riddance."

[Bernie]

Originally posted by Mogami
The Soviet Union declared war on Japan today the official news release. Foreign minister Molotov:

"Comrades as the glorious Red Army advances toward Berlin and the defeat of the fascist invaders. Comrade Stalin has decided the time has come to lend assistance to our American allies bogged down in their war against Japan. To aid in this war against millions of Japanese soldiers I have dispatched Comrade Colonel Mogami with his elite 5079th Guards Infantry Bn.
We hope to rid the world of the horrible future of Japanese motorcycles, washing machines and bad movies. We wish instead a bright future of Russian motorcycles, washing machines and bad movies. Russia will regain her lead as the worlds great whaling nation. Russia will avenge her defeat of 1902 and add the Korean peninsula and the nation of Japan to our Soviet family of nations. (And get the illustrious 5079th Guards Infantry Bn out of Russia) This unit is hand picked from throughout the entire mighty Red Army. Colonel Mogami has a combat record without parallel among Soviet officers. We excpect an immediate drop in drunkness and desertion thourghout the front, wait I mean we expect this glourius unit to record new deeds in the growing legend of the victouries Red Army, Good Luck Colonel Mogami and good riddance."

Ah, wre groing to makee origami out of Col Mogami. Wre fold hirm, wre straple hrim, wre mutrirate him!

[Goblin]

Originally posted by Bernie
Ah, wre groing to makee origami out of Col Mogami. Wre fold hirm, wre straple hrim, wre mutrirate him!

Since there are no subtitles available, I will translate for Bernie-san.

"We plan to engage our honorable foe (Comrade Colonel Mogami) in an honorable fashion. His troops are brave, but our Imperial troops are touched by the devine grace of the Emperor! It will be a shame to see such valiant foes find death at our hands, but death is as light as a feather, and duty heavier than a mountain."

Goblin- A Goblin is still studying Japanese

[Bernie]

Originally posted by Goblin


Since there are no subtitles available, I will translate for Bernie-san.

"We plan to engage our honorable foe (Comrade Colonel Mogami) in an honorable fashion. His troops are brave, but our Imperial troops are touched by the devine grace of the Emperor! It will be a shame to see such valiant foes find death at our hands, but death is as light as a feather, and duty heavier than a mountain."

Goblin- A Goblin is still studying Japanese

Nro, nro, Grobrin-san! Death rike mrountan, druty rike feddar! We dlopee mrountan rike Mt. Fuji ona Mogami hred! It hlurt many time, mluch pain!

(If my Japanese half-sister ever sees this thread I'm a dead man. )

[Goblin]

Originally posted by Bernie
Nro, nro, Grobrin-san! Death rike mrountan, druty rike feddar! We dlopee mrountan rike Mt. Fuji ona Mogami hred! It hlurt many time, mluch pain!

Bernie-san says he appreciates my assistance in translations, and while he regrets hostilities with Comrade Colonel Mogami, political avenues towards peace have been exhausted. It will therefore be necessary to use force, as per Colonel Bernie-san's orders from his Emperor. He says prayers to the war spirits, and to the spirits of his ancestors, for those on both sides that will fall bravely in glorious battle.

Goblin- A Goblin fascilitates communication

[mogami]

IIpmBet, R *Ay c Hetepnehnem 6opotbcA . RnoHeu Bce ymnpanot ckopo. ToBapmiii CranmH B MockBe HanpaBneHHbm Ry6mBatb Bce M3 Hmx.

Grüße Japaner sterben alle. Kamerad Stalin in Moskau hat mich geleitet, um sie ganz zu töten.

Des salutations, le japonais tous meurent. Le camarade Staline à Moscou m'a ordonné de les tuer tous

Saludos, el japonés todos mueren. El camarada Stalin en Moscú ha ordenado que yo los mate todos

I saluti, giapponesi tutti muoiono. Il camerata Stalin a Mosca lo ha diretto ucciderlo tutti.

[Bernie]

Originally posted by Mogami
IIpmBet, R *Ay c Hetepnehnem 6opotbcA . RnoHeu Bce ymnpanot ckopo. ToBapmiii CranmH B MockBe HanpaBneHHbm Ry6mBatb Bce M3 Hmx.

Grüße Japaner sterben alle. Kamerad Stalin in Moskau hat mich geleitet, um sie ganz zu töten.

Des salutations, le japonais tous meurent. Le camarade Staline à Moscou m'a ordonné de les tuer tous

Saludos, el japonés todos mueren. El camarada Stalin en Moscú ha ordenado que yo los mate todos

I saluti, giapponesi tutti muoiono. Il camerata Stalin a Mosca lo ha diretto ucciderlo tutti.

私が彼をあなたの頭部分娩するように私の皇帝は, ロシア犬命じ
る! それはされる!

[mogami]

Boobieska don't be upset, I must make the appearence for the party. Those NKVD boys got no good sense of the humour. Really come on over and we drink vodka and chase my mortar crew girls.
I like the sunny Pacific, after that train ride across the Motherland I need to strech my legs. I have been made Regi-mental commander instead of Battilion. I go for a walk in the jungle today and bring my lads with me. Cook something good to eat we are tired of cabbage. There is no need for you to fight we come in peace and with nothing but good feelings for our little friends. You want to see your homeland again no? Come quietly and you will be well treated. We put you in the same comfort camp your German allies from Staligrad now relax in. The Red Army is your friend. Come on leave your dirty little rat holes and come out for party.

[Bernie]

Originally posted by Mogami
Boobieska don't be upset, I must make the appearence for the party. Those NKVD boys got no good sense of the humour. Really come on over and we drink vodka and chase my mortar crew girls.
I like the sunny Pacific, after that train ride across the Motherland I need to strech my legs. I have been made Regi-mental commander instead of Battilion. I go for a walk in the jungle today and bring my lads with me. Cook something good to eat we are tired of cabbage. There is no need for you to fight we come in peace and with nothing but good feelings for our little friends. You want to see your homeland again no? Come quietly and you will be well treated. We put you in the same comfort camp your German allies from Staligrad now relax in. The Red Army is your friend. Come on leave your dirty little rat holes and come out for party.

(Through interpreter)

Mogami-san, I regret that this I cannot do. Over the centuries your people have invaded our homeland and taken it from us. My Emporer has demanded your head, and I will give it to him. Better yours, than mine.

However, we are a gentle, merciful people. If you choose to lay down your weapons, sit and enjoy a meal with us (I regret we have only rice and fish, but much saki) I can promise that, like the Americans on Battan, we will simply take you for a short stroll, show you some of the native flora and fauna, then inter you until the end of the war in a peaceful, restful camp. You will live in a simple bamboo hut, enjoy fresh fish, get a little tan, and not have the war to worry about any longer. The climate here is nice, is it not? The native girls are very tempting also. You are in paradise, enjoy it. Surrender.

[mogami]

No No little Boo-boo san the Great Russian people are known for their peacefull gentle nature. We have tried on various occasions to bring enlightment and culture to your knife happy Island. All that head chopping and gut splitting it's so messy. If you will not come peacfully then I regret I must, for your own good convince you the error of your ways. The glourious Russian people disposed of our autocrats some time ago. We will be happy to free you from that little top hat wearing gnome you worship and bring you the most englighted form of goverment on the planet. Uncle Joes nothing for everyone 5 year plan will do for Japan what it has done for Russia. (personally after the war I plan on moving to Montana and raising rabbits but first I must get my hands on a submarine)

[Bernie]

Originally posted by Mogami
No No little Boo-boo san the Great Russian people are known for their peacefull gentle nature. We have tried on various occasions to bring enlightment and culture to your knife happy Island. All that head chopping and gut splitting it's so messy. If you will not come peacfully then I regret I must, for your own good convince you the error of your ways. The glourious Russian people disposed of our autocrats some time ago. We will be happy to free you from that little top hat wearing gnome you worship and bring you the most englighted form of goverment on the planet. Uncle Joes nothing for everyone 5 year plan will do for Japan what it has done for Russia. (personally after the war I plan on moving to Montana and raising rabbits but first I must get my hands on a submarine)

Bah! Enough of this chit-chat like old women on wash day! I am a samurai, to surrender would bring disgrace and dishonor on me, my family and my Emperor! Prepare to taste my steel.

[mogami]

Oh Sam-I-Am Boobyska bringing a knife to a gun fight is not wise. The 5079th Penal....err Guards infantry Bn will collect your little swords and pistols and helmets and have a big sale after victory parade in MockBe. You must have be in jungle too long and the sun has baked your head. We are not the little wooden shoe wearing Dutch boys you beat up on Java. Nor or we the little naked China soldiers who give you such nightmares. We are Red Army we eat little monkey boys like you for breakfast.

What is all that smoke wwaaayyyyyy back from front line for? It will blow away hours before I can get that far. Trying to cover your reteat? Discrace? Dishoner? silly words how about Dead and dismembered? After we capture Tokyo we are going to stuff the emperour down the barrell of one of our mighty battleship guns and fire him off toward moon, so don't worry about what he thinks. But time for talk is over my women mortar crews are upset with you making fun of them doing laundry. Hurry up and advance I'll meet you halfway and we can get this over with.
You will recognize me easy I am big Russian Bear riding on T-34