Bring me the head of Diego Garcia...and the Mayor of Addu Atoll too!

[Cap Mandrake]

***********Milo's Breastaurant, Batangas*********


Michael J. O'Doherty, Archbishop of Manila: Mr. Minderbinder, you do have a beautiful establishment here and I have to say the seared ahi is superb, but I am afraid I must return to the question of demure attire for the women. We are trying to return to some morality and decorum after you fellows rid of us the bloody Japs here in southern Luzon.

Man in fine linen slacks who has called upon every ounce of his closing skills: I completely understand, Your Excellency. Every once of us wants this terrible war to be finished. <turns to huirsute man> Captain Yossarian, do fetch His Excellency a bottle of the best Bushmills we have!

Michael J. O'Doherty, Archbishop of Manila: Oh, no. I really shouldn't. I've a mass to say in Lucena at 4.

Man in fine linen slacks who has called upon every ounce of his closing skills: Single malt. 20 years.

Michael J. O'Doherty, Archbishop of Manila: <his jaw quivers..2 years of privation and sacrifice...> Oh dear, well, perhaps a wee bit....

[witpqs]

How much cargo do those funicules carry? Do you have unicorns, too?

[Chickenboy]

Wrong whiskey, Milo! Wrong whiskey! The Archbishop should know a Protestant whiskey from a Catholic one! [:@]

[moore4807]

Great catch Chickenboy!

the good Cap IS having a bad week... Its got to be nearing vacation time in Sunny CA by now isn't it?

[Itdepends]

If the van is a rocking..........

[Cap Mandrake]

********Bubbas Do It Yourself Truck Wash And Breastaurant, Fresno*******

Slim: No, NO, don't wash the top of that storage thing in front!

Mabel: Why on Earth not?

Slim: Look......just don't, OK?

[Cap Mandrake]

[font="Courier New"]My Dearest Admiral Lord SPrior;

Kandy House, Ceylon


Operation Pick-Up Enemy Morale was quite successful today. I now advocate that we start fighting back again while we have ships left. Do you agree?


With the Warmest of Earnest Tepidity

Fleet Admiral Mandrake

FOB San Miguel[/font]

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

Wrong whiskey, Milo! Wrong whiskey! The Archbishop should know a Protestant whiskey from a Catholic one! [:@]

Wait a minute. The poor guy has been trapped in Manira under a brutal occupation for 15 months and you are going to fault him for overlooking the loyalties of the owners of Bushmills?

Besides, this is 1943(c), things might have been different.


**********April 28, 1530(c), Picardy, France***********


Street vendor: Fajitas taco, Monsieur?

John Calvin: <glances at vendor as he steps into street> No Monsier <SPLAAAAT, he is killed instantly by a wagon carrying new brand of Irish whiskey.>

[Cap Mandrake]

*********April 28, 413 years later********

JJ tries to copy us

Night Air attack on Batan Island , at 85,70

Weather in hex: Heavy rain

Raid detected at 35 NM, estimated altitude 11,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 11 minutes

Japanese aircraft
Ki-49-IIa Helen x 3

No Japanese losses

Aircraft Attacking:
3 x Ki-49-IIa Helen bombing from 8000 feet
Airfield Attack: 4 x 250 kg GP Bomb

This is unlikely to stop the Mongol Horde.

Night Naval bombardment of Lingayen at 79,75

Allied Ships
CA Wichita
DD Cony

Japanese ground losses:
19 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 3 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled

[Cap Mandrake]

The CVE's were tasked to escort 8th Aus up toward Iba. The good news...it was brilliant to provide an escort.....the bad news...without Wasp (now joined up with Yorktown) it wasn't enough.

The crevah rittah yerrow baahstards pull of a beautifully escorted raid..from Manira maybe..or even Leyte?

We have a good CAP, though perhaps fatigued....but....46 escorts...47 on CAP

Morning Air attack on TF, near Siargao at 83,88

Weather in hex: Severe storms

Raid detected at 65 NM, estimated altitude 6,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 27 minutes

Japanese aircraft
A6M2 Zero x 19
A6M3a Zero x 25
B5N2 Kate x 17
G4M1 Betty x 9
Ki-45 KAIa Nick x 2

Allied aircraft
Martlet II x 5
F4F-4 Wildcat x 42

Japanese aircraft losses
A6M2 Zero: 3 destroyed
A6M3a Zero: 4 destroyed
B5N2 Kate: 5 destroyed, 1 damaged
G4M1 Betty: 2 destroyed, 2 damaged
G4M1 Betty: 1 destroyed by flak
Ki-45 KAIa Nick: 1 destroyed

Allied aircraft losses
F4F-4 Wildcat: 1 destroyed

Allied Ships
CVE Sangamon, Torpedo hits 1
CVE Altamaha, Torpedo hits 1, on fire
CVE Nassau, Torpedo hits 1

[Cap Mandrake]

CVE="Carrier, Very Explosive"

[Cap Mandrake]

Then, in the afternoon. Altamaha, probably crippled gets creamed. CAP is burned out and the nearby bases have very few fighters because of the push over Lingayen.

Afternoon Air attack on TF, near Siargao at 83,88

Weather in hex: Light cloud

Raid detected at 73 NM, estimated altitude 9,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 31 minutes

Japanese aircraft
A6M2 Zero x 10
A6M3a Zero x 2
B5N2 Kate x 4

Allied aircraft
F4F-4 Wildcat x 7

Japanese aircraft losses
A6M2 Zero: 2 destroyed
B5N2 Kate: 3 damaged

Allied aircraft losses
F4F-4 Wildcat: 1 destroyed

Allied Ships
CVE Altamaha, Torpedo hits 3, and is sunk

[Cap Mandrake]

Oh, did I mention the big air push over Lingayen, you know, the one I spent at least 45 minutes meticulously planning...grouping squadrons by Air HQ, matching groups to aviation support, providing escorts, coordinating altitudes, providing LRCAP and sweep missions...and recon..and even a photographer from Life? Yeah, that one.

Apparently Superstorm Sandino decided to hit Lingayen and ZERO missions flew. [:@]

[Cap Mandrake]

We finally killed the last WJD's in Southern Luzon. Vermin.

Ground combat at Atimonan (80,79)

Allied Deliberate attack

Attacking force 1482 troops, 3 guns, 203 vehicles, Assault Value = 131

Defending force 827 troops, 10 guns, 0 vehicles, Assault Value = 10

Allied adjusted assault: 76

Japanese adjusted defense: 1

Allied assault odds: 76 to 1

Combat modifiers
Defender: leaders(+), leaders(-), disruption(-), preparation(-)
supply(-)
Attacker:

Japanese ground losses:
639 casualties reported
Squads: 12 destroyed, 0 disabled
Non Combat: 10 destroyed, 52 disabled
Engineers: 4 destroyed, 0 disabled
Guns lost 12 (12 destroyed, 0 disabled)

Assaulting units:
34th Infantry Regiment
767th Tank Battalion
1st USMC Tank Battalion
37th Aviation Base Force
44th USN Naval Construction Battalion
64th Cst AA Rgt /5
9 Group RAAF
822/828 Engineer Aviation Battalion
503rd Parachute Rgt /12

Defending units:
30th JNAF AF Unit

[Cap Mandrake]

The Spetsnaz attack at Kagi fails. JJ deduced the intent and flew in some troops (probably from Takao next door)

Ground combat at Kagi (85,64)

Allied Shock attack

Attacking force 40 troops, 2 guns, 0 vehicles, Assault Value = 3

Defending force 392 troops, 12 guns, 0 vehicles, Assault Value = 21

Allied adjusted assault: 0

Japanese adjusted defense: 10

Allied assault odds: 1 to 99 (fort level 3)

Combat modifiers
Defender: preparation(-)
Attacker: shock(+), leaders(-)

Allied ground losses:
12 casualties reported
Squads: 1 destroyed, 1 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled

Assaulting units:
503rd Parachute Regiment

Defending units:
12th Garrison Unit /1

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Oh, did I mention the big air push over Lingayen, you know, the one I spent at least 45 minutes meticulously planning...grouping squadrons by Air HQ, matching groups to aviation support, providing escorts, coordinating altitudes, providing LRCAP and sweep missions...and recon..and even a photographer from Life? Yeah, that one.

Apparently Superstorm Sandino decided to hit Lingayen and ZERO missions flew. [:@]

Did this sound kind of petulant? If so, I blame the staff.

[Rio Bravo]

I just finished reading all of Bullwinkle's AAR.

I have a long ways to get current with your AAR, Cap.

I'm working on getting current.

Thank you for keeping us posted on your brawl and for giving all of us so much fun reading.

[Cap Mandrake]

So, SG and I decided to go to San Diego Saturday for the night. The weather was fantastic so we started trying to find a room. EVERYTHING under $500 is booked and there is a $100 premium on everything. Comicon convention? No, I think that's over? We finally find a place in Encinitas about 25 miles up the coast. When we get there we discover it's the Gay Pride festival. Even worse, we were too late for the parade.

So we find this place in Encinitas, Vigilucci's...seriously good...wine, carpaccio, cioppino. SG gets so swept up in the atmosphere she has to go kiss the owner on the cheek when we are leaving. $200 and we have to thank HIM? [:D] The guy was just an operator. Any women without escorts he is there with free appetizers and booze. There were three women at the bar together. One looked like she just got out of a POW camp in Khota Baru, one was a bit chunky and the third was just right. Guess which one he is giving a backrub to? [:)]

[poodlebrain]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

So, SG and I decided to go to San Diego Saturday for the night. The weather was fantastic so we started trying to find a room. EVERYTHING under $500 is booked and there is a $100 premium on everything. Comicon convention? No, I think that's over? We finally find a place in Encinitas about 25 miles up the coast. When we get there we discover it's the Gay Pride festival. Even worse, we were too late for the parade.

So we find this place in Encinitas, Vigilucci's...seriously good...wine, carpaccio, cioppino. SG gets so swept up in the atmosphere she has to go kiss the owner on the cheek when we are leaving. $200 and we have to thank HIM? [:D] The guy was just an operator. Any women without escorts he is there with free appetizers and booze. There were three women at the bar together. One looked like she just got out of a POW camp in Khota Baru, one was a bit chunky and the third was just right. Guess which one he is giving a backrub to? [:)]

I hope you didn't pass up the opportunity to ask him if he had an ancestor named Milo while you were thanking him.

[dcpollay]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

CVE="Carrier, Very Explosive"

"Combustible, Vulnerable, Expendable."