The Good The Bad & The Indifferent

[Canoerebel]

Well it's nearly 5 a.m. and I'm still sitting here. I have 1,100 words down on "paper." In the grogginess of the long night, I'm not sure if they're good or awful. There's probably some of both. Hopefully it's good enough that some robust editing will allow it to see the light of day. My stories usually go through at least 50 edits that may take weeks or months. And they need it. And ever since Lokasenna got involved in my AAR, I've had this dreadful apprehension of Purple Prose.

[Canoerebel]

It's after 6 a.m. What a long, weird night. I made it through and got some words down on paper.

I pledged to post it, warts and all, so here it is.

If it's awful, don't fear that I've done something that can't be fixed or undone. It will be months before this is published. In the meantime, it'll go through about 30 drafts. My wife will proofread it. Others will proof it. So unless we're all asleep at the wheel, there will be rigorous quality-control check.

But I should know in about three hours if it has any potential whatsoever. I'm going to present it to my class at the local college. That's where the walks took place that led to this story. The students will have a particular interest for that reason, but they'll also let me know whether I'm on the right track or not.

P.S. I'm posting this via Paint. I think it'll work, but it may be overly small or large.

[MakeeLearn]

Good Morning Little Miss Sunshine

[Canoerebel]

[:'(]

[BBfanboy]

Two thoughts:

- the only thing I would have included in the impressions of the autumn leaves is the smell. Here where there are many Green Poplar trees (AKA Aspen) the fallen leaves yield a subtle odor reminiscent of the bark of the tree when cut. On those Indian Summer days of late October when the sky is clear of all cloud and the leafless trees allow the sun to shed some warmth on the path, it is the smell of autumn, or summer's work done and rest to prepare for spring.

- although we contemplate the end of our days and things undone, we can take satisfaction of sorts in having contributed our work, thought and (for most) offspring to the fabric of human history. As the fallen leaves and old trees fertilize the fresh growth of the forest, our departure makes space for new life but leaves the best part of us to help it flourish.

I like the way you link the threads of what you are experiencing and thinking with poets past. It reminds us that the cycle of life continues regardless of our daily concerns and much remains the same as it ever was. The poem you wrote reminded me when, as a Scout Leader, a forester was teaching us about the plants of the forest floor. Until I broke a sassafras stem and smelled the aroma, I never knew that the drink "sassafras" (referred to in old westerns) was "root beer"! Cheeers!

[Mike McCreery]

You disenfranchised me in the first paragraph when you assumed this only happens for poets.

[BBfanboy]

ORIGINAL: Wargmr

You disenfranchised me in the first paragraph when you assumed this only happens for poets.

Don't all of us have some poet in our soul - the ability to observe our surroundings and think simple but profound thoughts about them?

[dave sindel]

When I log onto the WITPAE forum, the first thing I look for are any new posts in this AAR. I thoroughly enjoy the discussions of the game itself, but it is also quite a treat to see what other topics are being discussed as well. Botany, fishing, poetry in just the last couple of days.

[Kitakami]

I wish my sleepless nights were as productive as yours... at the very least in the soul-searching. The Sassafras or anything like it would be the icing on the cake!

[Canoerebel]

Yeah, when I refer to "poets," I mean all of us - collectively. Like BBfanboy says, there's a bit of poet in every one of us.

I'm not much of a poet. Really, I'm not one at all. I've written about eight poems that I'm not ashamed of. I've written a bunch that I am ashamed of. Some of the words that ended up "on paper" were incredibly bad.

But avid readers and avid writers often have a love affair with words. Some writers can make words sing. Some make them squeak in protest.

Searching for just the right word is fun. When you find it, the satisfaction is amazing. As Mark Twain said, the difference between a good word and the perfect words is as the difference between the lightning bug and lightning.

I read the story to my class today. Their reaction was what I had hoped for. But they are prejudiced - I knew they would appreciate the topic, and they know and tolerate my writing and speaking. Still, they make a good sounding board. For now, I'll put it aside for a few days, then re-read it with a fresh eye.

[Canoerebel]

ORIGINAL: Kitakami
I wish my sleepless nights were as productive as yours... at the very least in the soul-searching. The Sassafras or anything like it would be the icing on the cake!

Well, most of mine aren't productive. Too many of them are spent obsessing over this game.

[Canoerebel]

2/5/45

Strategic Map: Paint isn't crisp, but the red dot that represents KB East stands out sharply inside the white circle.

[paullus99]

You know, even Jeb Stuart only rode around the Union Army twice.....

[Canoerebel]

2/5/45

KB East:

[Canoerebel]

ORIGINAL: paullus99

You know, even Jeb Stuart only rode around the Union Army twice.....

General Lee to General Stuart in Gettysburg: "Could it be that you were mistaken about my orders?"

[Canoerebel]

2/5/45

Fancy Pants: John lost a lot of units today: 65ht Div. near Chuhsien, the Gunzan garrison near Keijo, and a sizeable part of the Suchow defenders. Hong Kong held against a 2:1, but forts dropped to 1.

Funnel Cakes: Ikoma and Chikuma escaped further damage; the Allies eliminated the Gunzan stack; Allied units are advancing in good order to Keijo and the base east of Gunzan; and supply and reinforcements to commence landing tomorrow.

[JeffroK]

IMVHO

I think the para starting, "Georgia's mountain poet" is one too many paras quoting someone.

The others have enough "fill" around them, this seems to be 1 too many.

[Bullwinkle58]

"Garrison" VP losses are minor, but there are supply flow effects too, as well as potential destruction of base infrastructure. Randomized, and maybe also a functi0on of base size. I think there was a pretty significant change to the garrison penalty rules in a very early patch, but I don't recall the details.

[paullus99]

Ouch - that raid has got to hurt & I bet he lost a bunch of pilots too.....though, it seems like it was light on bombers.

He may be configured with more fighters than normal in the hopes that you'll try to attack his carriers with your own.....

[JohnDillworth]

Gaius Marius was a great Roman General who would only fight on his own terms and at a place of his choosing. Initially, his Legions thought him a poor general at best and more likely a coward. His opponents would taunt him and try to get him to attack saying, "if you are such a great general why not come here and fight us" to which he would respond "surely if you were a great opponent you could make me do such a thing". Gaius Marius stuck to his guns and eventually his opponents attached him at the place of his choosing. With the sun at his back (by design) Gaius Marius annihilated a larger force at the Battle of Vercellae, saving Rome from a barbarian invasion. He was celebrated as the third founder of Rome. I say all of this because it frustrates some of the peanut gallery (myself included) that you let ships escape without air attack and allow divisions to sail to battle unopposed. I also say this because I thought a Roman analogy would be a nice change from yet another Civil War analogy Your a good General Dan. Stick to your guns