From here to...well...it SEEMS like an eternity

[tabpub]

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[Moondawggie]

Mandrake, I hope those Brits fight to the last man protecting that amazing paleontolgy find that has delayed their advance to support the Mandalay/Myitkyina railway operation. I'd hate to see those invaluable fossils fall into IJA/IJN control.

Say, just how many victory points does one get for each dinosaur fossil in one's possession? The manual seems to be a little vague on this point...

As for Chennault, forget the Ritalin. It's a kid's drug. Try adding some Bourbon and Branch instead, interspersed with lots of big cigars; the results can be amazing---just ask Adolph Galland who had to deal with it in another hemisphere.

(At least that way Chennault would morph into a Curtis Lemay clone who unleashes holy hell on that poor forgotten theater.)

Good luck with stalker girl...[:)]

[Cap Mandrake]

*****Sqdrn Ldr's Quaters, No. 155 Sdrn., Myitkyina, 05:30, October 30, 1942******

Sqdrn. Ldr. D. Astin: <enters tent and takes off cap and throws it to the other man in the tent> Harold, you'd best head down to the briefing room. We need to finalize the plans for the move to Yunan. The Yanks we are replacing are due here shortly.

Sqdrn. Ldr. H. Astin:You are right, David. I'll push off in a minute but I was just reading the kind letter from Brigadier Farley . He just recommended us for a 2nd bar. Listen to this: <begins reading> "Sqdrn Ldr Astin is without a doubt the most energetic man I have ever met. His ability to lead his men by example is without peer. His ability to appear fresh and optimitstic even after 24 hrs without sleep is truly astounding....."

Sqdrn. Ldr. D. Astin: Splendid! Say, don't forget to close the tent flap, the sun will be coming up soon and I am fagged out.






One more kill and they will be an ace!

[Moondawggie]

By the same logic, then wouldn't L. Swales and B. Swales (with 3 kills each) already&nbsp;be a "collective" ace as well?&nbsp;[:)]
&nbsp;
Of course, I realize that "A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds." (Winston Churchill)&nbsp;
&nbsp;
Who knows---maybe different rules apply to SLDRs&nbsp;and&nbsp;FLTs.&nbsp;
&nbsp;
I'd get those Yanks in there ASAP,&nbsp;freeing up&nbsp;those doughty to&nbsp;Brits argue over their relative positions in Blake's Peerage...

[HMS Resolution]

That's actually an Emerson quote, not a Churchill quote.

[Moondawggie]

I stand corrected!&nbsp;
&nbsp;

A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, adored by little statesmen and philosophers and divines.

[/align]Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 - 1882), Self-Reliance
But so what?&nbsp; The narrative was true; we just got the facts wrong.&nbsp; (Jonathan Alter, 2007)
&nbsp;
&nbsp;

[Cap Mandrake]

**********Galley, USS Boise, Perth Harbor, October 31, 1942************


<3 sailors stand in front of a giant pantry with clipbaords>

Seaman Able: How about Baker, he is pretty much wasted? <laughter from the other side of the pantry>

Seaman Baker: Screw you, Able.

Seaman Able: You wish, Baker. <more laughter from the pantry>

Seaman Baker: Chief, Able is making offensive sexual banter. I've already asked him to stop before.

Chief: If you two girls don't shut up, offensive sexual banter will be the least of your problems. Get to work! The Captain wants to get the spoilage report to the task force commander by 14:00. Ok, here is what I have: Potato 52 lbs, bread 11 loaves with mold, 3 with weevils, oranges 22....................

[timtom]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

**********Galley, USS Boise, Perth Harbor, October 31, 1942************

<3 sailors stand in front of a giant pantry with clipbaords>

Seaman Able: How about Baker, he is pretty much wasted? <laughter from the other side of the pantry>

Seaman Baker: Screw you, Able.

Seaman Able: You wish, Baker. <more laughter from the pantry>

Seaman Baker: Chief, Able is making offensive sexual banter. I've already asked him to stop before.

Chief: If you two girls don't shut up, offensive sexual banter will be the least of your problems. Get to work! The Captain wants to get the spoilage report to the task force commander by 14:00. Ok, here is what I have: Potato 52 lbs, bread 11 loaves with mold, 3 with weevils, oranges 22....................

And there's me thinking that there's no spoilage in the USN, just "Ration, USMC, Reserved for the Consumption by, Only".

[BrucePowers]

Me thinks I task force may be getting ready to sail[:)]

[Cap Mandrake]

***********10th US Army Air Force HQ, Dacca, November 1, 1942************



Gen. Chennault: Colonel, when I walked across the parade ground this morn, I saw a patch of blue in the sky. Please explain to me why my planes aren't up in the air killing Japs.


Deputy CO: Sir, we lost quite a few birds and had just as many damaged. We have just finished repainting and calibrating the replacement aircraft and are about 60% there on repairs to the damaged birds. There is something else. It's morale, sir.


Gen. Chennault: MORALE!? That is bull shit, Colonel. The best remedy for poor morale is a boot up their ass. <seems to reconsider> Ah, Hell. I promised the Doc. What about a morale officer? Don't we have a Goddamned morale officer?


Deputy CO: Yes sir. That would be Major Domo, sir. <points in the direction of an implausibly young-looking officer, who quickly develops a remarkable pallor..no it's more than pallor, he is positivley post-mortem in appearance>


Gen. Chennault: <after a 1 1/2 second pause he can no longer contain himself> Well, stand up son! We have a Goddamned war to fight. Are you pulling my leg, son? Is that really your Goddamned name?


Major Domo: <Now standing ramrod straight> No sir.


Gen. Chennault: Well, what the Hell IS your name?


Major Domo: Oh, no sir, I mean, yes sir. That is my name and no, I wasn't pulling your leg sir.


Gen. Chennault: Well, it's a stupid name. I hate stupid names.


Major Domo: Well, sir, it's short for Dombrowski, sir. My grandfather shortened it to Domo when he landed on Ellis Ilsnad because it sounded Polish.


Gen. Chennault: What do you mean it SOUNDED Polish. It IS Polish.


Major Domo: Yes sir.


Gen. Chennault: Well change it! I am not having an officer in my command by the name of Major Domo. It's stupid. I don't like stupid names.


Major Domo: Yes sir!


Gen. Chennault: Good. now please tell me you plans for improving morale at 10th Air Force.


Major Domo: <now becomes more animated, the blood returning to his young Polish face> Yes sir! We've had a bit of spectacular luck. I've just received a large USO shipment. We have 10 brand new Parchisi boards and.....

[DuckofTindalos]

Wonder how many of his brand new Parchisi boards can be rammed up Major Domo's backside by the good General...[:D]

[BrucePowers]

What about a good John Wayne movie...Flying Tigers maybe [:D]

[Onime No Kyo]

What would that do for&nbsp;morale? [&:]

[Cap Mandrake]

*********Aboard HMS Formidable, flaghsip of TF 1065, Perth Harbour, 15:30, October 31, 1942***********

Lt. Botulinum: <enters and salutes his superior, then hands over a document> Sir, spoilage figures for the entire task force.

Capt. La T. Bisset, RN: Thank you, Lt. <looks over the list..."bread 413 loaves, tubers (all types) 212, rum 493 bottles.."> Hmmmm? The rum figure looks high. I thought I ordered the replenishment contract with M & M Sea Catering cancelled? I cannot bring myself to trust that man. Make sure that has been taken care of then get this to Eastern Fleet ASAP by shortwave.....

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: Moondawggie

By the same logic, then wouldn't L. Swales and B. Swales (with 3 kills each) already be a "collective" ace as well? [:)]

They are not identical twins. Do I have to explain everything around here? [:'(][;)]

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: Moondawggie

Good luck with stalker girl...[:)]

I invited her to the company "Holiday" party tonight. We'll see if she can get to the bathroom and back without getting stabbed.

[BrucePowers]

What, she's back in town[X(][8D]

I thought she was in Idaho.

And while I'm asking, what of the homeowners association?

[bobogoboom]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

ORIGINAL: Moondawggie

Good luck with stalker girl...[:)]

I invited her to the company "Holiday" party tonight. We'll see if she can get to the bathroom and back without getting stabbed.

[&:] why would someone want to stab her?

[Moondawggie]

[blockquote]quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake


[blockquote]quote:

ORIGINAL: Moondawggie

Good luck with stalker girl...[:)]

[/blockquote]

I invited her to the company "Holiday" party tonight. We'll see if she can get to the bathroom and back without getting stabbed.
[/blockquote]

[&:] why would someone want to stab her?

Bobo, for the simple reason that Mandrake&nbsp;must be&nbsp;an incredibly attractive, desirable &nbsp;"hunk o' sizzlin' junk!"&nbsp;
&nbsp;
After all, he plays WITP, doesn't he?&nbsp;
&nbsp;
Obviously, all of the single, Southern California blonde MAs and RNs and NPs that Mandrake works with are gonna be after him at the company party, and they don't want any unlocal Bosie Babe moving into their turf.&nbsp; Stabbing is a realistic concern once the champagne flow for an hour or two...
&nbsp;
BTW, what is happening in Burma, Mandrake?&nbsp;

[Cap Mandrake]

*************Eastern Fleet HQ, Trincomalee, Ceylon, 18:20, October 31, 1942*********

Admiral Somerville picks up a form from his inbox. It reads "Eastern Fleet Spoilage Report, October 31, 1942". He scans down the list until one item catches his trained eye.

"What on Earth?! 2,489 cans of salted sea urchin roe! The Royal Navy could replace a whole squadron of Stringbags for the cost of that. Bloody war profiteers! <calls out to his secretary> Drummond, get this to SEAC ASAP and prepare to take a memo regarding inventory control of salted sea urchin roe...no wait...I've just thought of something. Get me Phillips on the phone. See if he isn't too busy with his restaurant in Bombay to come down and help with this.