Jokes about weapons

[HansBolter]

Advertisement for a French rifle for sale:


"French rifle, never fired, dropped once"

[cdbeck]

This one is in really bad taste...

Q: What is the best way to break up an Iraqi Bingo game?

A: Yell, "B-52!"

Please forgive me in advance.

SoM

[sprior]

ORIGINAL: gunny

Sterling Submachine Gun

We were told the best way to clear a room of enemy during close quarter fighting with this weapon was to cock it, throw it in the room and run away. 

True story, I was on the range , got the order to fire single shot with the sterling, 5 round per exposure. I squeezed the trigger and released, Braaap! All 30 rounds gone. Ofcourse the range control officer was freakin hehe

On the firing range with Sterling SMGs GI (Gunnery Instructor) sees baby artificer holding said gun with left gun on magazine instead of on the barrel guard and says (very loudly), "W ho do you think you are, Captain f@*&%^$% Hurricane?"

[cdbeck]

Q: Why do some men (especially here on this forum) prefer GUNS over WOMEN?

A: You can trade an old 44 for a 22.

[;)]

Also here is a funny site about the rules for Gun fighting comparing the USMC and the US-Navy.

Navy and Marine Rules for Gun Fighting

Please note: The views expressed here are not those of the poster in regards to the Navy. I believe there are lots of uses for Seamen. [:'(]

SoM

[Hard Sarge]

SoM

I like it, I like

[105mm Howitzer]

I believe it was named for the defense minister who authorized it's construction. Wasn't greeted with enthusiasm by all staff officers in the French Army. ( among them was DeGaule)

[cdbeck]

ORIGINAL: 105mm Howitzer

I believe it was named for the defense minister who authorized it's construction. Wasn't greeted with enthusiasm by all staff officers in the French Army. ( among them was DeGaule)

LOL... that is almost as funny as the Joke. 105mm, this is a joke thread. The "Question" was, "What does Maginot Line mean in French?" and the "answer" was "Speed Bump Ahead."

Admittedly, not a GOOD joke... but looks like you need to comb your hair a little higher to catch it from flying over! [:'(]

SoM

[SMK-at-work]

ORIGINAL: Son_of_Montfort

What does "Maginot Line" mean in French?

"Speed bump ahead."

The funniest ones have a ring of truth....which this one doesn't!! [:'(]

Of course eth line did exactly what it was intended to do....the Germans did not attack across eth frontier!!

Maginot was the guy in chage when it was built - it was designed befoer he held office.

And of course as with many such massive investments, it's purpose by the time it was "in use" was quite different to that intended. It was intended to delay a German invasion while armies of manouvre mobilised behind it and moved up to fill it out.

By the late 1930's it was seen as an invulnerable whiled....which is was never intended to be and probably would not have been had hte Germans attacked - without mobile formations to counterattack and penetrations it would possibly have been over-run quite easily!

But that theory was never tested.....the Americans still found it a problem attacking it from the rear in 1944 at Metz tho!!

[Kuokkanen]

And more fun about BattleMechs. What do we get when we replace an destroyed nuclear fusion engine of an assault 'Mech (80-100 tons) with an internal combustion engine? Answers behind following links:
Mediocre
Mudzilla
Indeed! [X(]

This is fun too:
http://www.heavymetalpro.com/forums/vie ... hp?t=16212

[morvwilson]

What about the French kingdom that drown becaus the king wanted to be burried at sea?

[06 Maestro]

ORIGINAL: Son_of_Montfort

What does "Maginot Line" mean in French?

"Speed bump ahead."

SoM

Low blow, but funny.

[105mm Howitzer]

No no, it's backwards-subtle, you see....The seriousness of the answer concerning French a useless French fortification, compounded by the fact tha tI used ridiculous words such as " Staff officers and French Army all in one"...You do see it, yes no? [&:]

ORIGINAL: Son_of_Montfort

ORIGINAL: 105mm Howitzer

I believe it was named for the defense minister who authorized it's construction. Wasn't greeted with enthusiasm by all staff officers in the French Army. ( among them was DeGaule)

LOL... that is almost as funny as the Joke. 105mm, this is a joke thread. The "Question" was, "What does Maginot Line mean in French?" and the "answer" was "Speed Bump Ahead."

Admittedly, not a GOOD joke... but looks like you need to comb your hair a little higher to catch it from flying over! [:'(]

SoM

[Kuokkanen]

I just found this:

LYRAN PROBLEM SOLVING: Sending a Hauptmann to jump on the problem repeatedly.

Hauptmann is 95 ton OmniMech made by Lyran Alliance, and it's jump capable [X(]

[String]

We have several in the estonian defence forces about the soviet 9mm PM (Makarov) pistol.

It's often called nine shots and an accurate/precise throw. They also say that when you're being shot at with a PM run away in a straight line. If you zig-zag you might end up in front of some of the bullets.. [:-]