U.S. Army believed they had too many officers and decided to offer an early retirement bonus.
They promised the officers who volunteered retirement a bonus of $ 1.000 for every inch measured in a straight line between two points on his body.
The officers were free to choose what those two points would be.
The first officer who accepted asked that he would be measured from the top of his head to the tip of his toes.
His measurement was 72 inches and he went out with a bonus of $ 72,000.
The second officer who accepted was a little smarter and asked to be measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes.
He walked out with $ 96,000.
The third was an old warrant officer, a real grizzly bear. When they asked how he would like to be measured, he replied
"From the tip of the penis to my testicles."
They wondered if maybe he would not reconsider its dimensions, and talks about the nice big bonuses the previous two officers had received.
But the old officer insisted, and they decided to let him have his measurements done as he wished. The measurement was performed by a medical officer.
The doctor came and gave the officer the order to "drop 'em", which he did.
The doctor puts out the measuring tape at the tip and begins to measure down when he suddenly exclaims ..
- "Oh my God! Where are your testicles?"
- "In Vietnam."
[:D] Grollub I am definitely going to use this joke.
