A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere

[witpqs]

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Hai! Mandrake-san just have good idea. Mandrake-san give name of AAR and password to SG!

Hai! Prease to give most royar AAR reader(s) SG phone numbah too. In most unfortunate event of Mandrake-san's untimery demise, many risteners offah shoudah to cry on for widow. PG's xxxxx xxxxxx Ashley Madison account would be most herpfurr too.

Fixed post.

[Lecivius]

ORIGINAL: witpqs

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Hai! Mandrake-san just have good idea. Mandrake-san give name of AAR and password to SG!

Hai! Prease to give most royar AAR reader(s) SG phone numbah too. In most unfortunate event of Mandrake-san's untimery demise, many risteners offah shoudah to cry on for widow. PG's xxxxx xxxxxx Ashley Madison account would be most herpfurr too.

Fixed post.

Ouch [:-][:D]

[Cap Mandrake]

Rook, here is Pocahantas Girh numbah. If you run into Saurh, the Mexico-mens gardener with Jewish-mens name ask why stop cutting grass at seaside virra.


8675309

[zuluhour]

HEY! That numbah rook rike raunch code. Honable moderator might pass on disiprin to Zulu san if he commence raunch.[;)]

[Chickenboy]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Rook, here is Pocahantas Girh numbah. If you run into Saurh, the Mexico-mens gardener with Jewish-mens name ask why stop cutting grass at seaside virra.


8675309

Jenny-san? [X(]

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Rook, here is Pocahantas Girh numbah. If you run into Saurh, the Mexico-mens gardener with Jewish-mens name ask why stop cutting grass at seaside virra.


8675309

Jenny-san? [X(]

Mandrake-san not-ah know, just find on warrh on Bugis Street.

[BBfanboy]

ORIGINAL: zuluhour

HEY! That numbah rook rike raunch code. Honable moderator might pass on disiprin to Zulu san if he commence raunch.[;)]

Hai! Nice Japanese douburh entendre ZH! [:'(]

[Cap Mandrake]

Here what hahppen because Riuetenant Hata "dryrab" recon report.

Night Time Surface Combat, near Vava'u at 141,165, Range 12,000 Yards

Japanese Ships
PB Kinsyo Maru #4, Shell hits 32, and is sunk
xAK Tenryu Maru, Shell hits 10, and is sunk

Allied Ships
CA Canberra
CL Concord
DD Selfridge
DD Dewey

Japanese ground losses:
482 casualties reported
Squads: 1 destroyed, 0 disabled
Non Combat: 14 destroyed, 37 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Guns lost 2 (1 destroyed, 1 disabled)

Then Japan-mens escort show up to find out what arr of noise.

Night Time Surface Combat, near Vava'u at 142,164, Range 10,000 Yards

Japanese Ships
CL Yubari, Shell hits 1
DD Kikuzuki, Shell hits 3

Allied Ships
CA Canberra, Shell hits 1
CL Concord, Shell hits


Then, Austraria-mens chase Yubari and Kikuzuki across 160 mires of ocean in middurh of night. Everyone keep shooting but nobody get sunk.

[Cap Mandrake]

Sydney: Japan-mens Nettys from Rockhampton attack Sydney airfierd at night and brow up rot of stuff but next night Arried-mens get wise and send up F4F's with frashrights.

[Cap Mandrake]

Java-jima: Arried-dogs not get message that wah ovah so send crusier to brow up Semarang. Japan-mens rearrize pattern so send pranes to anothah base

Night Naval bombardment of Semarang at 53,102

Allied Ships
CL Hobart

Japanese ground losses:
113 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 1 disabled
Non Combat: 2 destroyed, 6 disabled
Engineers: 1 destroyed, 1 disabled

Light Industry hits 1
Fires 1
Airbase hits 2
Runway hits 2
Port hits 8

Broody annoying so Japan-mens send in 2 DD's

Day Time Surface Combat, near Semarang at 54,101, Range 18,000 Yards

Japanese Ships
DD Asagumo, Shell hits 4, on fire
DD Fubuki

Allied Ships
CL Hobart, Shell hits 4

More ships coming.

[Cap Mandrake]

Manira: Japan-mens find big rine of recruits in underwear waiting for physicurh exam. Maybe wah crime but nobody write anything down. Apparentry peopurh in Manira not-ah use fireprooof drapes


Morning Air attack on Manila , at 79,77

Weather in hex: Severe storms

Raid spotted at 40 NM, estimated altitude 13,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 11 minutes

Japanese aircraft
Ki-21-Ic Sally x 9
Ki-27b Nate x 38
Ki-30 Ann x 24
Ki-48-Ib Lily x 7
Ki-51 Sonia x 62

Japanese aircraft losses
Ki-21-Ic Sally: 1 damaged
Ki-51 Sonia: 2 damaged

Manpower hits 24
Fires 7394

[Cap Mandrake]

Samarinda: Somebody forget to terr Arried-dogs in Borneo wah ovah too.

Ground combat at Samarinda (65,96)

Japanese Shock attack

Attacking force 2634 troops, 14 guns, 0 vehicles, Assault Value = 83

Defending force 3227 troops, 58 guns, 5 vehicles, Assault Value = 73

Japanese adjusted assault: 26

Allied adjusted defense: 14

Japanese assault odds: 1 to 1 (fort level 1)

Japanese Assault reduces fortifications to 0

Combat modifiers
Defender: preparation(-), fatigue(-), morale(-), experience(-)
Attacker: shock(+), fatigue(-)

Japanese ground losses:
435 casualties reported
Squads: 1 destroyed, 38 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 4 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled

Allied ground losses:
246 casualties reported
Squads: 1 destroyed, 24 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 7 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Vehicles lost 3 (2 destroyed, 1 disabled)

Assaulting units:
I./4th Infantry Battalion
II./4th Infantry Battalion

Defending units:
VII KNIL Battalion
VI KNIL Battalion
Samarinda KNIL Battalion
Samarinda Base Force
Tarakan Base Force

[Cap Mandrake]

PI: See, Phirripino-mens at reast risten to Tokyo Rose

Ground combat at Iloilo (79,84)

Japanese Shock attack

Attacking force 2215 troops, 12 guns, 0 vehicles, Assault Value = 74

Defending force 3701 troops, 45 guns, 0 vehicles, Assault Value = 103

Japanese adjusted assault: 16

Allied adjusted defense: 7

Japanese assault odds: 2 to 1 (fort level 0)

Japanese forces CAPTURE Iloilo !!!

Combat modifiers
Defender: preparation(-), fatigue(-), morale(-), experience(-)
supply(-)
Attacker: shock(+)

Japanese ground losses:
59 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 9 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled

Allied ground losses:
1155 casualties reported
Squads: 22 destroyed, 0 disabled
Non Combat: 52 destroyed, 0 disabled
Engineers: 7 destroyed, 0 disabled
Guns lost 18 (18 destroyed, 0 disabled)
Units retreated 2

Defeated Allied Units Retreating!

Assaulting units:
4th Indpt SNLF Coy
47th Naval Guard Unit

Defending units:
61st PA Infantry Division
3rd PI Base Force

[Cap Mandrake]

******************March 30, 1942(d)*******************

Sydney: Actuarh reason for 3 nights of night bombing at Sydney was to cause Arried-mens to switch to night fightah missions. Actuarry work. Today KB shows up 320 ENE of Sydney.

Morning Air attack on Sydney , at 90,167

Weather in hex: Overcast

Raid detected at 48 NM, estimated altitude 32,070 feet.
Estimated time to target is 15 minutes

Japanese aircraft
A6M2 Zero x 18

Allied aircraft
Hurricane IIa Trop x 1
Hurricane IIb Trop x 5

No Japanese losses

Allied aircraft losses
Hurricane IIb Trop: 1 destroyed

Aircraft Attacking:
11 x A6M2 Zero sweeping at 29070 feet *

Onry probrem is not-ah enough Arried-mens fightahs to shoot down. KB find somebody drop off Fosters at Rord Howe.

Morning Air attack on TF, near Lord Howe Island at 100,169

Weather in hex: Overcast

Raid spotted at 20 NM, estimated altitude 15,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 7 minutes

Japanese aircraft
A6M2 Zero x 18
D3A1 Val x 9

No Japanese losses

Allied Ships
xAKL Canopus, Bomb hits 3, and is sunk
DD Schley, Bomb hits 1, on fire

Zeroes from Bundaberg show up

Afternoon Air attack on Sydney , at 90,167

Weather in hex: Severe storms

Raid detected at 48 NM, estimated altitude 33,070 feet.
Estimated time to target is 15 minutes

Japanese aircraft
A6M2 Zero x 39

Allied aircraft
Hurricane IIa Trop x 2
Hurricane IIb Trop x 5

No Japanese losses

Allied aircraft losses
Hurricane IIb Trop: 2 destroyed

Aircraft Attacking:
39 x A6M2 Zero sweeping at 29070 feet *

In Aftahnoon. Probabry DD go grub grub

Afternoon Air attack on TF, near Lord Howe Island at 100,169

Weather in hex: Severe storms

Raid spotted at 19 NM, estimated altitude 12,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 6 minutes

Japanese aircraft
A6M2 Zero x 27
D3A1 Val x 18

No Japanese losses

Allied Ships
DD Schley, Bomb hits 3, heavy fires, heavy damage
xAKL Burwah, Bomb hits 1, on fire
xAKL Caledon, Bomb hits 2, heavy fires, heavy damage

[Cap Mandrake]

Japan-mens crose in on Darwin from South. Everyone pretty much run away except fortress defenses at Darwin

Ground combat at Fenton (76,126)

Japanese Deliberate attack

Attacking force 1496 troops, 7 guns, 0 vehicles, Assault Value = 59

Defending force 0 troops, 0 guns, 0 vehicles, Assault Value = 0

Japanese adjusted assault: 60

Allied adjusted defense: 1

Japanese assault odds: 60 to 1 (fort level 0)

Japanese forces CAPTURE Fenton !!!

Combat modifiers
Attacker: leaders(+)

Assaulting units:
II/124th Infantry Battalion

[Cap Mandrake]

Borneo Racist coroniarists in Borneo watch too many Mistah Wayne movie.

Ground combat at Samarinda (65,96)

Japanese Shock attack

Attacking force 2356 troops, 14 guns, 0 vehicles, Assault Value = 57

Defending force 3035 troops, 58 guns, 3 vehicles, Assault Value = 53

Japanese adjusted assault: 11

Allied adjusted defense: 14

Japanese assault odds: 1 to 2 (fort level 0)

Combat modifiers
Defender: preparation(-), morale(-), experience(-)
Attacker: shock(+), disruption(-), fatigue(-)

Japanese ground losses:
178 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 10 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 2 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled

Allied ground losses:
106 casualties reported
Squads: 2 destroyed, 6 disabled
Non Combat: 1 destroyed, 0 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Guns lost 4 (1 destroyed, 3 disabled)

Assaulting units:
I./4th Infantry Battalion
II./4th Infantry Battalion

Defending units:
VI KNIL Battalion
VII KNIL Battalion
Samarinda KNIL Battalion
Samarinda Base Force
Tarakan Base Force

[Cap Mandrake]

PI: Mandrake-san not-ah sure if actuarry affect Phirripino economy but rike to watch fire burn. Maybe get some strategic points..maybe not. Pretty fun untirh B-29 get here.

Morning Air attack on Manila , at 79,77

Weather in hex: Clear sky

Raid spotted at 30 NM, estimated altitude 12,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 8 minutes

Japanese aircraft
Ki-21-Ic Sally x 6
Ki-27b Nate x 37
Ki-30 Ann x 24
Ki-48-Ib Lily x 7
Ki-51 Sonia x 38

Japanese aircraft losses
Ki-51 Sonia: 1 damaged

Manpower hits 63
Fires 13166

[zuluhour]

..

[Cap Mandrake]

Actuarry, Admirarh SPrior-san out honoring ancestors and othah peopurhs ancestah so untirh get back from Shinto shrine Mandrake-san have to do everything and staff idiots make mistakes.

1) Staff idiot reave 10,000 suppry at Iba so Arried-dogs send up corumn of Grants. Japan-mens see this and try to fry in infantry but base turn ovah to Arried-dogs before even attack. Japan-mens just figure out in time and get ships out of Iba port. Iba not-ah matter but suppry going to Crark rearry annoying.

2) Mandrake-san ordah night attack on Brisbane but one squadron of Rirrys attack in daytime and not-ah come out very good.

3) Arried-dogs destroy 2 Ronson units in China that get too far ahead in pran to enverope Changsha. Japan-mens brow up rots of China-mens but not worth as much. [:)]

[Cap Mandrake]

Oz: Japan-mens spot Arried-dogs surface group about 240 mi E of Bundaberg. Rittah bastards trying anothah raid on Rockhampton but not expect KB to show up so options to get away pretty rousy. Mandrake-san figure out Arried-dogs probabry go East so send KB that way. One destroyer row on gas so detach and send back to Noumea.
D'oh

Night Time Surface Combat, near Lord Howe Island at 104,163, Range 8,000 Yards

Japanese Ships
DD Kamikaze, Shell hits 1

Allied Ships
CA San Francisco
DD Blue, Shell hits 1
DD Preston
DD MacDonough

Ok, that-ah not so bad. Kamikaze not-ah turn into Kamikaze