Bring me the head of Diego Garcia...and the Mayor of Addu Atoll too!

[stuman]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

weegie

Weegie - A slighty derogatory term applied to people from Glasgow by the occupants of the other, more insignificant area's of Scotland. Apply tired, dated, stereotypes abouts slums to the general indifference to Glaswegians themselves who feel superior in the knowledge that anything decent/interesting culturally evolves from Glasgow and the Greater Glasgow district. Often around ten years in front of the rest of Scotand in this respect. Music, humour, restaurants superior to any of the other smaller cities; people are also friendlier and blessed with a personality, distinguishing them further from other Scots. Problems quite divided in terms of Religion, Protestant bigotry. Also Class: middle class and conforming youths Vs working class or any one who hasn't adopted the bizarre new 'posh' accent.


Teutcher: Ken, Ya weegie soap dodger eh?
Glaswegian: Away ye go out ma face Hamish and come into the 21t century if you could ya sheepshaggin' loser.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Weegie

EDITOR'S NOTE: Apparently, they also do not use pronouns or complete sentences when attempting to speak the King's English

I tried Google Translate on that passage. It didn't help me.

[perkinh]

Help! I am home for the holidays this week and have finally caught up. Now i am jonesing for another fix...where is the next turn.

[sprior]

The world wonders.

[Cap Mandrake]

One of the Wee Jap Dobber Admirals was away for R&R.[:)] AE is not as much fun when one is dealt a defeat. I know this from personal experience. I nearly had to check myself into a inpatient psych facility when Saratoga was sunk just trying to deliver a couple of useless Brewster squadrons to Oz....and Sydney Harbour got nuked with a bunch of nice ships in it.

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: sprior

The world wonders.

I don't think there are any Egyptians or Bhutanese on the forum.

[Cap Mandrake]

...

[Cap Mandrake]

Actually, I realize we had no results posted from the 28th of June. A sub gauntlet was set up to catch a wounded WJD carrier trying to make Noumea. Several WJD intact DD's were attacked unsuccessfully. These may have been escorts but no carriers were spotted. Against the transports, the subs had better luck, sinking or damaging three AK's with WJD troops aboard. These may have been evacuees or or a second wave intended for Nadi or Suva. Most of the WJD transports moved NW, correctly anticipating the gauntlet.

The SBD's sunk a laden AK but the B-26's just roughed up a school of Bottlenose Dolphin and there is going to be Hell to pay. No Jap air attacks over Suva or Nadi today, it is too costly in Netties.

A big Jap attack at Nadi fails. They gave it a shot before things get worse, which they will. The WJD Naval Guard unit pinned down on the North Fiji coast attacked today but was repelled by the Stuarts (the tanks not the Jacobites) opposing them. All 3 WJD groups on Fiji are now isolated and are doomed with thousands of Marines and support troops pouring in at Suva.

[Cap Mandrake]

*********Little Shrimp Bar & Grill, Waipapakauri, North Island, New Zealand, June 28, 1942*******


<5 pilots in somewhat unkempt USAAF uniforms and one chap in fine linen slacks sit about a table in converstaion>

Chap in fine linen slacks: ...look, the US Army Air Force doesn't want you. Why don't you all come to work for me? Ask Yossarian. Am I right?

Hirsute Captain: He's right. Once you get past the idea of not having a purpose, it can all be very fulfilling.

Lt. Dobbs: But what about our commissions? We are all officers in the United States Army Air Force.

Chap in fine linen slacks: No, you USED to be officers in the United States Army Air Force. Now you are all dead...according to the Army.

Lt. Dobbs: Not me. I am only MIA. I am waiting for my form 22-127A to come through.

Hirsute Captain: And then what? You are POW?

Lt. Dobbs: No, KIA.

Hirsute Captain: Right, so you are as GOOD as dead.

Lt. Dobbs: Yossarian you are so negative.

Hirsute Captain: You are petitioning the Army to move from MIA to KIA status and I am the one who is "negative"?

Lt. Dobbs: I want my parents to get my purple heart. Is that so wrong?

Chap in fine linen slacks: Dobbs, if you come to work for me, I will give you TWO Purple Hearts AND make you squadron commander.

Hirsute Captain: All in favor of Dobbs as new squadron commander say "Aye"

Group: AYE!

Hirsute Captain: See there, Dobbs, Now you can write home and tell your mom you made squadron commander.

Lt. Dobbs: But she thinks I'm dead?

Hirsute Captain: Then she will be doubly surprised! Screw the US Army, Dobbs. When is the last time you got paid? All in favor of screwing the US Army say "Aye".

Group, including Dobbs this time: AYE!

Lt. Dobbs: Say, this is kind of fun.

Hirsute Captain: Damn right! All in favor of having a drink to First Lt. Dobbs, Squadron CO, say "Aye".

Group: AYE!

[Cap Mandrake]

...

[Cap Mandrake]

I got the whole GD day off and it's raining and no turn in the inbox...no problem...I'll watch The Pacific (a "pressie", as Admiral Lord Sprior would say, from Stalker Girl) on BlueRay.


So I fire the thing up and the damn Sony BlueRay player isn't working. [:@] One too many racist Jap jokes I suspect.

No problem. I'll fire up Black Ops (another pressie) on the PS3....can't find the damn thing. [:@]

Damn it! It's down to picking up the dog **** in the dining room (it's raining and the poor dears are too precious to get wet so they fall back on plan "B"). Now I can't find the shovel......[:@]

Screw this. I am going to drive to Best Buy and buy me a Korean BlueRay player.

[Mynok]

War in the East is cheaper and doesn't require a trip. [:'(]

[sprior]

I think we're going shopping for a home theatre system tomorrow.

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: sprior

I think we're going shopping for a home theatre system tomorrow.

I would get one of these too. The Leso Brewster Series Bariatric Chair. Rated to 600lbs. Self-sealing, Urea-resistant upholstery. Service Ceiling 2 1/2 feet. Extended range model of 40 inch width available.

[Mynok]

ORIGINAL: sprior

I think we're going shopping for a home theatre system tomorrow.

You like AE because you are in control, don't ya? [:'(]

[sprior]

ORIGINAL: Mynok

ORIGINAL: sprior

I think we're going shopping for a home theatre system tomorrow.

You like AE because you are in control, don't ya? [:'(]

Just about the only place I am, apparently.

[Panther Bait]

Hey, doesn't the PS3 plays Blu-Ray DVDs? Maybe it doesn't play pressies, though.

Mike

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: Panther Bait

Hey, doesn't the PS3 plays Blu-Ray DVDs? Maybe it doesn't play pressies, though.

Mike

I can't find the damn PS3.

Tentative plan for Operation Limberger. I picked stinky cheeses as a theme as Admiral Lord Sprior already had small mamalian predators.

After the spanking off Fiji, I think the WJD's will only be able to contest with Akagi, Kaga and one or two CVL's.

[Cap Mandrake]

By the way, I find it curious that some place with a romantic name like "Thousand Ships Bay" would be buildable to a level one port. [:)] Something is very odd.

[sprior]

We have another offensive op lined up?

[Cap Mandrake]

*******Village of Sepi, SE tip of Santa Isabel Is., Solomons, June 30, 1942*******

Village Chief, Sepi: ...No, dis call Sepi Bay.

Young Man in Fine Linen Slacks: Sepi Bay is no good Chief. It has no hook.

Village Chief, Sepi: Chief no want hook. Chief no like fish.

Young Man in Fine Linen Slacks: It's not a literal hook, chief, it's a marketing term. Look at it this way. The US Navy could pick a thousand spots to land around here. They haven't been here Chief. They are just going by the maps and the maps they get from me say "Thousand Ships Bay". Now, where would you rather have a base, Sepi Bay or Thousand Ships Bay?

Village Chief, Sepi: Thousand ships no fit here. Thousand canoes no fit here.

Young Man in Fine Linen Slacks: You know that Chief and I know that but the US Navy doesn't know that. Look, Chief, it's like this. You like cargo right?

Village Chief, Sepi: Yes, Chief like cargo.

Young Man in Fine Linen Slacks: Right, so if you want cargo it has to be Thousand Ships Bay.

Village Chief, Sepi: OK, Thousand Ships Bay.

Young Man in Fine Linen Slacks: You have to sell it.

Village Chief, Sepi: What sell?

Young Man in Fine Linen Slacks: Not sell literally Chief. I mean you have to pretend it has ALWAYS been Thousand Ships Bay.

Village Chief, Sepi: OK, Chief sell. Thousand Ships Bay. Chief understand.

Young Man in Fine Linen Slacks: Right, now the next thing is zoning regulations.

Village Chief, Sepi: What zoning regulations?

Young Man in Fine Linen Slacks: You know, restrictive easements, mosquito abatement fees, sewage bond fees, application fees yada, yada, yada. They want a base. Once they land they aren't going anywhere. You just nickel and dime them to death.

Village Chief, Sepi: OK, Chief like yada, yada, yada..........