Bring me the head of Diego Garcia...and the Mayor of Addu Atoll too!

[witpqs]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Advice Needed:


I just discovered I have TWO lawnmowers (when I went hunting for the drain snake to clean out the roof drain). Now, here is the hard part. As I haven't cut my own grass for at least 5 years do you think I should keep them just to keep the gardener on his toes? I wouldn't want him to get complacent.

Take that welding class like you always wanted to. Then, make some nice lawn art to annoy Frau Blucha. Your attorney can defend it on first amendment grounds, maybe even get you a civil rights lawsuit out of it if the push you too far (you do cry easily, right?).

[Chickenboy]

Way too much work. Put together a 3' mound of fossilized dog turds and / or roadkill on your lawn. Put a flag and a strobe light on top. Call it performance art. Same premise, cheaper construction.

[BrucePowers]

Man I've been away too long (or not long enough[:D]). We've denegrated to performance art[X(]

[Itdepends]

ORIGINAL: sprior

No, the manifest destiny thing is all your own. We just want to spread cricket to the unenlightened.

Congratulations on the ashes win. Pity the only rejoicing English fans shown on the TV appear to be complete yobbos.

[Cap Mandrake]

********Moffet Field, near San Francisco, June 30, 1942*******

1st Lt. Speicher cautiously pushes the throttle level forward and is rewarded with a satisfying exhaust note.

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Just then, an even louder sound is heard. It is a blimp passing over the training area on ASW patrol....MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM...the Lt. looks skyward, distracted by the blimp.

Lt. Cmdr Ready, Squadron CO, standing on a ladder with a megaphone: LOUDER!

Remainder of crews of VMSB 232:MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

[Cap Mandrake]

Who's idea was this?

[Cap Mandrake]

********Moffet Field, near San Francisco, June 30, 1942*******


Lt. Cmdr Ready, Squadron CO, standing on a ladder with a megaphone: OK, now tilt it 15% starboard!

Maj Kimes, USMC: <approaches the other officer on the ladder> Excuse me, Lt Cmdr., I have orders to assume command.

Lt. Cmdr Ready, Squadron CO, standing on a ladder with a megaphone: CUT! What do you mean? This is my squadron.

Maj Kimes, USMC: Sorry sir, orders. No more Navy officers in charge of Marine Squadrons.

Lt. Cmdr Ready, Squadron CO, standing on a ladder with a megaphone: Damnit! I worked these men into shape.

Maj Kimes, USMC: Sorry sir, war is Hell.

Lt. Cmdr Ready, Squadron CO, standing on a ladder with a megaphone: You got that right. <climbs down ladder and hands over megaphone and begins the long walk back to the officer's club>

Maj Kimes, USMC: <grabs megaphone> OK, I want to hear a supercharged engine at military output!

Crews: MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

[Cap Mandrake]

A Marine VMSB squadron with no planes and a Navy CO??

I suppose I am responsible somehow?

[Reg]

It wouldn't have anything to do with Do Not Upgrade and no SBD-1 in the pool????

Watch out they'll have you up for cruel and unusual punishment (flying obsolete A/C) next....

(Even a museum flight requires one exhibit. [:D])


[size=-2](Dont you repress me!!!)[/size]

[BrucePowers]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

A Marine VMSB squadron with no planes and a Navy CO??

I suppose I am responsible somehow?

assign them to the Army Air Corps to complete the circle.......[:)]

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: Reg

It wouldn't have anything to do with Do Not Upgrade and no SBD-1 in the pool????

Watch out they'll have you up for cruel and unusual punishment (flying obsolete A/C) next....

(Even a museum flight requires one exhibit. [:D])


[size=-2](Dont you repress me!!!)[/size]

Indeed, there are ZERO SBD-1's and only 2 SBD-3's. I am not going to waste SBD-3's on this lot. I think I must have disbanded them a while back..probably during the fight on New Scotland. It seemed a good idea at the time.

I will let them "gestate" for a while.

[sprior]

Pity the only rejoicing English fans shown on the TV appear to be complete yobbos

a. It makes better TV and
b. It wouldn't do for Australians to see normal Brits celebrating.

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: sprior

Pity the only rejoicing English fans shown on the TV appear to be complete yobbos

a. It makes better TV and
b. It wouldn't do for Australians to see normal Brits celebrating.

I am guessing "yobbos" is an unflattering term

[Cap Mandrake]

***********M&M Enterprises South Pacific Regional HQ, Waipapakauri, New Zealand, July 1, 1942***********


Young man in fine linen slacks: <on the phone> What do you mean the Thousand Ships Bay thing is off? I've got Cheatham working on the zoning documents even now? Goddamnit! Find out where they are going and get back to me. <hangs up phone>

I pull strings to get Nimitz in as SouPac CO and HE goes all wobbly on me. He is supposed to have a 64 aggression rating. That is a perfectly good case of single malt Scotch gone to waste.

Hiruste USAAF Former Officer in Hawaiian Shirt: Milo, you crazy SOB, never trust anyone over the rank of 1st Lt.

Young man in fine linen slacks: You are a Captain, Yossarian, you crazy SOB.

Hiruste USAAF Former Officer in Hawaiian Shirt: QED...quod erat demonstrandum. It means what was to be demonstrated.

Young man in fine linen slacks: Have you been reading again Yossarian, you crazy half-literate SOB?

[Cap Mandrake]

Here is the Urban Dictionary definition of "QED". [:D]

Originally Latin meaning "quod erat demonstrandum" or "which was to be shown or proven", now used mainly by physics students to insult someone when something is proven wrong or false, typically with the words Mother Fucker added for effect.

Ha! Your wrong.. QED mother fucker!*


*Editor's Note: The possessive pronoun "your" should not be used a verb. What is likely intended here is the contraction "you're". Come to think of it, "QED" isn't a verb either and sho....<POOF>

[Cap Mandrake]

Claimed WJD losses dating to the relief of Fiji. Hiryu was on for a day then disappeared. My guess is two WJD fleet carriers swimming with the fishes. Most of the damage was done by the SBD's

[Cap Mandrake]

Jap cruiser losses to date

[Cap Mandrake]

Allied cruiser losses to date. 13/18 are from the battle for New Scotland. Oops. [:o]

One has to break a few eggs.....

[Cap Mandrake]

Allied Destroyer losses. Aj Caramba!

I have a feeling we have already exceeded hsitoric losses in the PTO.

[Cap Mandrake]

Wee Jap Dobber Destroyer losses. Not trivial either...and they can less well tolerate it.