From here to...well...it SEEMS like an eternity
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Cap Mandrake
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RE: Burma Roundup
Page 2. Sneaky Allied attack toward Mandalay.
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Cap Mandrake
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The 98% Solution
**********Aboard USS Mississippi, Sept 25, 1942, Somewhere between Midway and Pensacola*************
She is in tow in a calm sea, two Mahan class DD's dragging her bulk through the unintentionally uncooperative Pacific. A Chief Petty Officer stands atop a forward turret which is slewed off to port, her guns at differing elevations. He holds a cardboard megaphone as the last battery powered version is inoperative.
"OK Boys, here are the new orders.
1) You are assigned to emergency head port 1 <he points to a few canvas-covered planks to his left>. We are out of toilet paper. You are instructed to splash seawater from the nearby bucket onto your bilge pump should the need arise. Please be advised this is NOT drinking water. I repeat, this is NOT drinking water. Also, make sure you strap yourself in with the safety harness. The Captain is really angry about the man overboard calls.
2) The main desalinator has failed. You are therefore instructed, in the event of rain, to stop all non-essential acitivities and point your open gullets toward the sky.
3) We have lost refrigeration. The menu has therefore been somewhat contracted. Breakfast will consist of salted beef and crackers. Lunch will be salted beef and cold canned green beans. Dinner will consist of salted beef and fig newtons for dessert. All the ships can openers have been renedered inoperable. Sailors are ordered to use a knife to open their cans.
4) In the event of submarine or air attack, you are instructed to go directly to your new, on-deck, assigned battle stations. With the exception of the aft 50 caliber crew, all others are instructed to quietly read the Lord's Prayer, handwritten copies of which have been supplied by the ship's Chaplain Office. Damage parties are working on repairing the Chaplain's typewriter at this time. ...................
She is in tow in a calm sea, two Mahan class DD's dragging her bulk through the unintentionally uncooperative Pacific. A Chief Petty Officer stands atop a forward turret which is slewed off to port, her guns at differing elevations. He holds a cardboard megaphone as the last battery powered version is inoperative.
"OK Boys, here are the new orders.
1) You are assigned to emergency head port 1 <he points to a few canvas-covered planks to his left>. We are out of toilet paper. You are instructed to splash seawater from the nearby bucket onto your bilge pump should the need arise. Please be advised this is NOT drinking water. I repeat, this is NOT drinking water. Also, make sure you strap yourself in with the safety harness. The Captain is really angry about the man overboard calls.
2) The main desalinator has failed. You are therefore instructed, in the event of rain, to stop all non-essential acitivities and point your open gullets toward the sky.
3) We have lost refrigeration. The menu has therefore been somewhat contracted. Breakfast will consist of salted beef and crackers. Lunch will be salted beef and cold canned green beans. Dinner will consist of salted beef and fig newtons for dessert. All the ships can openers have been renedered inoperable. Sailors are ordered to use a knife to open their cans.
4) In the event of submarine or air attack, you are instructed to go directly to your new, on-deck, assigned battle stations. With the exception of the aft 50 caliber crew, all others are instructed to quietly read the Lord's Prayer, handwritten copies of which have been supplied by the ship's Chaplain Office. Damage parties are working on repairing the Chaplain's typewriter at this time. ...................
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BrucePowers
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RE: The 98% Solution
Will she make port or not? Only the good Lord knows for sure
For what we are about to receive, may we be truly thankful.
Lieutenant Bush - Captain Horatio Hornblower by C S Forester
Lieutenant Bush - Captain Horatio Hornblower by C S Forester
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bobogoboom
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RE: The 98% Solution
[:D]What are her stats right now. We need to start taking bets as to wheather she makes port
I feel like I'm Han Solo, and you're Chewie, and she's Ben Kenobi, and we're in that bar.
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DuckofTindalos
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RE: The 98% Solution
Wonder if the aft 50 caliber crew won't be praying as well...
We are all dreams of the Giant Space Butterfly.
RE: The 98% Solution
you have to pardon Mandrake, he's English, you know.......ORIGINAL: bobogoboom
[:D]What are her stats right now. We need to start taking bets as to wheather she makes port
The ship in question is the Idaho, a member of the New Mexico class, of which the Mississippi is a sister ship; which undoubtably is the source of the confusion...
She's not bad now; Vestal and another AR pumped her out from the bottom of Midway Atoll and even fixed a point. She'll be ready for the victory tour of the Phillipines in '44 I think.
With several of the hydra's heads either cut off or severely mauled, the situation is much improved as the Fall approaches.
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Sing to the tune of "Man on the Flying Trapeze"
..Oh! We fly o'er the treetops with inches to spare,
There's smoke in the cockpit and gray in my hair.
The tracers look fine as a strafin' we go.
But, brother, we're TOO God damn low...
..Oh! We fly o'er the treetops with inches to spare,
There's smoke in the cockpit and gray in my hair.
The tracers look fine as a strafin' we go.
But, brother, we're TOO God damn low...
RE: The 98% Solution
ouch
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DuckofTindalos
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RE: The 98% Solution
Only 98 sys damage? I thought it was serious...[:D]
We are all dreams of the Giant Space Butterfly.
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bobogoboom
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RE: The 98% Solution
yeah i thought we might get to do bets like in the hibiki aar.[:(]
I feel like I'm Han Solo, and you're Chewie, and she's Ben Kenobi, and we're in that bar.
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bradfordkay
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DuckofTindalos
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RE: The 98% Solution
An I-boat? One seagull landing on the wrong part of the ship, and she'll sink![:D]
We are all dreams of the Giant Space Butterfly.
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Cap Mandrake
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I...da.....ho
*************Bridge of USS Vestal, Somewhere between Midway and Pensacola, Sept. 25, 1942*************
Sailor: <listening to headphoe> Captain. You are wanted by the ship's surgeon in sick bay. He says the Captain of the Mississippi is coming out of his coma. He says you want to hear this!
Cmmdr Moreschi: On my way! XO has the conn. <bolts down a flight of stairs and is gone>
************30 seconds later, sick bay***************
Doc Liebensraum: Ah, sir. I thought you might want to hear this. <they both draw near to a man in his late 50's in a Captain's unifrom>
Captain X: Uhhhhh......not mis...not missi.....
Cmmdr Moreschi: What is it Captain? What are you trying to tell us?
Captain X: Not miss..is..sip..pi. I...da......ho. Da...ho. Uhhhhh...
Cmmdr Moreschi: <leans closer to hear> WHAT CAPTAIN? WHAT ABOUT THE IDAHO?
Captain X: Uhhhh......hand...uhhh
Cmmdr Moreschi: HAND? WHAT IS IT, SIR? THE INVISIBLE HAND OF DEATH? WHAT, SIR? TELL US! PLEASE!
Captain X: Hand....hand on chest...uhhh
Cmmdr Moreschi: <Cmdr and Doc look down simultaneously to see they are both leaing on the Captain's chest> Oh....gee....sorry about that sir. Please continue.
Captain X: I..da...ho......stalk....stalker...arrow..points............down......ice...need ice <slips back into unconsciousness>
Cmmdr Moreschi: <stands upright> Stalker? Arrow points down? I wonder what he means by that?.................SUBMARINE! HE MEANS A SUB IS STALKING THE IDAHO!!!! <bolts toward hall barking orders> I am going to alert the destroyer squadron! See that he gets some ice. The man is a hero......
Sailor: <listening to headphoe> Captain. You are wanted by the ship's surgeon in sick bay. He says the Captain of the Mississippi is coming out of his coma. He says you want to hear this!
Cmmdr Moreschi: On my way! XO has the conn. <bolts down a flight of stairs and is gone>
************30 seconds later, sick bay***************
Doc Liebensraum: Ah, sir. I thought you might want to hear this. <they both draw near to a man in his late 50's in a Captain's unifrom>
Captain X: Uhhhhh......not mis...not missi.....
Cmmdr Moreschi: What is it Captain? What are you trying to tell us?
Captain X: Not miss..is..sip..pi. I...da......ho. Da...ho. Uhhhhh...
Cmmdr Moreschi: <leans closer to hear> WHAT CAPTAIN? WHAT ABOUT THE IDAHO?
Captain X: Uhhhh......hand...uhhh
Cmmdr Moreschi: HAND? WHAT IS IT, SIR? THE INVISIBLE HAND OF DEATH? WHAT, SIR? TELL US! PLEASE!
Captain X: Hand....hand on chest...uhhh
Cmmdr Moreschi: <Cmdr and Doc look down simultaneously to see they are both leaing on the Captain's chest> Oh....gee....sorry about that sir. Please continue.
Captain X: I..da...ho......stalk....stalker...arrow..points............down......ice...need ice <slips back into unconsciousness>
Cmmdr Moreschi: <stands upright> Stalker? Arrow points down? I wonder what he means by that?.................SUBMARINE! HE MEANS A SUB IS STALKING THE IDAHO!!!! <bolts toward hall barking orders> I am going to alert the destroyer squadron! See that he gets some ice. The man is a hero......
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DuckofTindalos
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BrucePowers
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RE: I...da.....ho
That makes the situation clear as mud[:D][:D]
For what we are about to receive, may we be truly thankful.
Lieutenant Bush - Captain Horatio Hornblower by C S Forester
Lieutenant Bush - Captain Horatio Hornblower by C S Forester
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Cap Mandrake
- Posts: 20737
- Joined: Fri Nov 15, 2002 8:37 am
- Location: Southern California
RE: I...da.....ho
ORIGINAL: BrucePowers
That makes the situation clear as mud[:D][:D]
The truth is Admiral Tabpub is right. It was the Idaho. Mississippi is in an escort force shepherding her to safety in XXXXXXXXX.
I think I just saw "Idaho" and went blank.
Along those lines, I just got an email asking for any special requests for a new wax job. I was thinking Henderson Field. The silhouette of PoW would be cool too but might be too challenging. Any thoughts?
RE: I...da.....ho
[:D]
Appear at places to which he must hasten; move swiftly where he does not expect you.
Sun Tzu
Sun Tzu
RE: I...da.....ho
ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
Any thoughts?
'Your car'! [:D]
Intel Monkey: https://sites.google.com/view/staffmonkeys/home
RE: I...da.....ho
Cap,
"Heart shape" is too trite and an "all-seeing eye" is too creepy.
Go with an exclamation point as it is already on the upgrade path from the previous arrow. It's different and easy, so you can't lose.
Best of all, it makes for interesting conversation at dinner.
Best of luck,
T Rav
"Heart shape" is too trite and an "all-seeing eye" is too creepy.
Go with an exclamation point as it is already on the upgrade path from the previous arrow. It's different and easy, so you can't lose.
Best of all, it makes for interesting conversation at dinner.
Best of luck,
T Rav
RE: I...da.....ho
Breaking Hobbit News:
"WASHINGTON (AP) - Scientists, wringing their hands over the identity of the famed "hobbit" fossil, have found a new clue in the wrist. Since the discovery of the bones in Indonesia in 2003, researchers have wrangled over whether the find was an ancient human ancestor or simply a modern human suffering from a genetic disorder.
Now, a study of the bones in the creature's left wrist lends weight to the human ancestor theory, according to a report in Friday's issue of the journal Science.
The wrist bones of the 3-foot-tall creature, technically known as Homo floresiensis, are basically indistinguishable from an African ape or early hominin-like wrist and nothing at all like that seen in modern humans and Neanderthals, according to the research team led by Matthew W. Tocheri of the Smithsonian's National Museum of Natural History.
That indicates that it is an early hominid and not a modern human with a physical disorder, they contend."
"WASHINGTON (AP) - Scientists, wringing their hands over the identity of the famed "hobbit" fossil, have found a new clue in the wrist. Since the discovery of the bones in Indonesia in 2003, researchers have wrangled over whether the find was an ancient human ancestor or simply a modern human suffering from a genetic disorder.
Now, a study of the bones in the creature's left wrist lends weight to the human ancestor theory, according to a report in Friday's issue of the journal Science.
The wrist bones of the 3-foot-tall creature, technically known as Homo floresiensis, are basically indistinguishable from an African ape or early hominin-like wrist and nothing at all like that seen in modern humans and Neanderthals, according to the research team led by Matthew W. Tocheri of the Smithsonian's National Museum of Natural History.
That indicates that it is an early hominid and not a modern human with a physical disorder, they contend."
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Cap Mandrake
- Posts: 20737
- Joined: Fri Nov 15, 2002 8:37 am
- Location: Southern California