From here to...well...it SEEMS like an eternity

Post descriptions of your brilliant successes and unfortunate demises.

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saj42
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RE: The brilliant (and charming) Count Czernin

Post by saj42 »

Oh dear - I should have kept my mouth shut [:D]

I got funny looks from the guys in the office when I burst out laughing when I read this - they have no understanding of the world of WWIIb. It is WWIIb isn't it?
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Onime No Kyo
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RE: The brilliant (and charming) Count Czernin

Post by Onime No Kyo »

I just got around to reading that whole deal. Thank you Mandrake for making me almost choke on lo mein.
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tabpub
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The plodding (and hairline challenged) Tabpub.

Post by tabpub »

-

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Sing to the tune of "Man on the Flying Trapeze"
..Oh! We fly o'er the treetops with inches to spare,
There's smoke in the cockpit and gray in my hair.
The tracers look fine as a strafin' we go.
But, brother, we're TOO God damn low...
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BrucePowers
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RE: The plodding (and hairline challenged) Tabpub.

Post by BrucePowers »

Tabpub is back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!![:)]
For what we are about to receive, may we be truly thankful.

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Moondawggie
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RE: The plodding (and hairline challenged) Tabpub.

Post by Moondawggie »

Tabpub, glad you are back!

A patient of mine once spent 8 hours befouled in cables 10K feet below the surface on a dive into the Mariana Trench before they were able to clear way and be successfully hoisted back aboard; I admire any man who who dares to plumb those depths!

Now (since Mandrake appears befuddled by the wiles of Boise womanhood) perhaps you can find the time to tell us how that little dust-up in the Pacific (and particularly Western Australia) has been playing out...

"The Yankees got all the smart ones, and look where it got them."

General George Pickett, the night before Gettysburg
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tabpub
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RE: The plodding (and hairline challenged) Tabpub.

Post by tabpub »

ORIGINAL: Moondawggie

Tabpub, glad you are back!

A patient of mine once spent 8 hours befouled in cables 10K feet below the surface on a dive into the Mariana Trench before they were able to clear way and be successfully hoisted back aboard; I admire any man who who dares to plumb those depths!

Now (since Mandrake appears befuddled by the wiles of Boise womanhood) perhaps you can find the time to tell us how that little dust-up in the Pacific (and particularly Western Australia) has been playing out...


Well, regarding Perth, the light is seen at the end of the tunnel now I believe. The 32nd ID under Gill has shown up....ah,...about 10-12 days ago as I recall. Blamey seemed excited at the prospect of ejecting the Japs from their trenches and launched a shock attack (perhaps two...). These didn't do much other than tire the troops out; Gill got on the horn to me as his former theater commander, I got hold of the Aussie PM and suggested that deliberately attacking might work better. The last two attacks have reached 1-1 odds and the last one saw about 2-1 Jap/Occidental losses. Looking at the schedule for today, looks like Blamey is going for the "rolling" attack; fresh units attacking while the disrupted rest. With our good supply, experience, air and firepower advanatage it should start really rolling in a couple more attacks.

Speaking of experience, all the infantry units there are either over or approaching 90 ratings.

I presume when you say "dust-up" you are speaking of the Midway exercise. That's all wrapped up of course; 1st MID and 37th ID are resting on the big island right now. WASP is nearing finishing repairs to her damage, airgroups are all in place and ready. Other carriers are not public knowledge at this time. Other than that, all that is going on is an accelerated sub campaign vs. both the Empire waters and the frontline area from Truk to PM. We are seeing some success here; I will try to keep up with it as it goes. As some of you might know, I do try to do the best possible job with the SS. With the divided command, Mandrake handles the DEI through the west side of the PI; while I handle the rest of the areas. He has the British, Dutch and some of the shorter ranged US types (Perch mainly).

That's about it. Any other questions? Submit them in triplicate to the proper offices. <where they will be duly ignored>

Dismissed.



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Sing to the tune of "Man on the Flying Trapeze"
..Oh! We fly o'er the treetops with inches to spare,
There's smoke in the cockpit and gray in my hair.
The tracers look fine as a strafin' we go.
But, brother, we're TOO God damn low...
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Cap Mandrake
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RE: The plodding (and hairline challenged) Tabpub.

Post by Cap Mandrake »

Wow, cool pictures the plodding (and hairline challenged) Tabpub.

Good show on giving the Hun a bad case of sphere envy. Huzzah!

I had no idea the Pitcarin Yards were so built up! Looks like Milo's co-marketing idea of pairing his election campaign with a discussion of "global cooling" has increased icebreaker orders bigtime. Nothing like the combination of the cynical manipulation of the electorate with fear and monopolistic business practices to get the juices flowing.

BTW...with the USS Idaho refit, are they going to take that goofy clock off the foremast or did that already get wasted in the battle?

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Cap Mandrake
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RE: The plodding (and hairline challenged) Tabpub.

Post by Cap Mandrake »

Editor's Note: After some spirited discussion among the editorial office staff we felt compelled to recommend either a comb-over or total scalp shaving. It was the general feeling here that any hair transplant efforts would fail the test of historical fealty.


Also, please note that the Editor-in-Chief position is still unfilled. We are prepared to offer a generous life insurance policy as part of the package. Interested parties can apply to the publisher with the notation "Attention:EIC"
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tabpub
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RE: The plodding (and hairline challenged) Tabpub.

Post by tabpub »

BTW...with the USS Idaho refit, are they going to take that goofy clock off the foremast or did that already get wasted in the battle?

"Shoot boy.....when you have 98% damage rating....the only things that are left are the bloody turrets; there is no superstructure anymore, lucky there's a hull left for the engines to sit in. That silly clock and the mast that it was attached too is sitting with all the wreckage forming a nice dive reef in 20-50 years."

Head of repairs SF Navy Yard.





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Sing to the tune of "Man on the Flying Trapeze"
..Oh! We fly o'er the treetops with inches to spare,
There's smoke in the cockpit and gray in my hair.
The tracers look fine as a strafin' we go.
But, brother, we're TOO God damn low...
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BrucePowers
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RE: The plodding (and hairline challenged) Tabpub.

Post by BrucePowers »

Are you saying the BuShips did not know what they were doing when they put that device there?[:D]
For what we are about to receive, may we be truly thankful.

Lieutenant Bush - Captain Horatio Hornblower by C S Forester
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rtrapasso
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RE: The plodding (and hairline challenged) Tabpub.

Post by rtrapasso »

ORIGINAL: BrucePowers

Are you saying the BuShips did not know what they were doing when they put that device there?[:D]

It was placed there for the sole purpose of dramatic line delivery, i.e.:

The enemy shells were splashing around them, but the Idaho's guns roared back in defiance. Frantically trying to log the engagement, a midshipman cried "What time is it?"

The chief looked up at the clock on clock on the foremast, then at the distant IJN ship erupting in flames and replied grimly "Time to die!"

[:'(] [:'(]
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Cap Mandrake
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The stubborn (and unimaginative) Gen. Blamey

Post by Cap Mandrake »

****************Western Australia Command, HQ, Perth, October 6, 1942***************


Gen. Blamey: Right then, with the arrival of US 32nd ID, I believe we are in a position to drive the Japs out of their postions in one spectacular coup de main. Tomorrow morning at 08:00, after a preparotry barrage from all guns, a maximal effort from all Allied air forces and Royal Navy air assets in the area and naval gunfire support from Royal Navy and USN crusiers, I have arranged for all the bells of Perth to be tolled simultaneously. This will be our signal for all forces to ascend from their trenches in a 12 mile arc around the city and begin their charge toward the enemy.

Gen. Gill, CO, US 32nd ID: Sir, do you really think that is advisable sir? After all, they are certain to have many hundreds of machine guns in improved postions. Perhaps an attack in echelon might be more effective with the armor held back to exploit?

Gen. Blamey: Nonsense. I shan't have such defeatest talk in my command. Now, I would like suggestions for a common yell. Something that we could all get behind.

Gen. Gill, CO, US 32nd ID: Common ..yell, sir?

Gen. Blamey: Yes, yes. The Japs have "BONZAI!" We need something equally catchy. What do you gentlemen think about "CHARGE!"? I know it's been done, but it is so succinct and will be sure to be recognized by British, American and Australian troops......
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Cap Mandrake
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SSTU

Post by Cap Mandrake »

..

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rtrapasso
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RE: SSTU

Post by rtrapasso »

Jerry Garcia, Sr??? [X(] [:D]
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VSWG
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RE: The stubborn (and unimaginative) Gen. Blamey

Post by VSWG »

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

preparotry
Must... resist... comment... AAARRRRGHHHH!! [:D]
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Cap Mandrake
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RE: The stubborn (and unimaginative) Gen. Blamey

Post by Cap Mandrake »

*************M & M Enterprises HQ, Perth, October 12, 1942***********

Milo: <Smokeing a cigar and dictating a letter, feet up on a desk> M & M Enterprises, Language Services Division deepley regrets any emabarrasssment suffured by the stubburn and unimaginative General Blamey due to spelling ro typograrphical errors during tramcription of his conversations. Rest assured, the offedning aprty is beeing disciplaned.

Yossarium: Can you do that? Didn't yoou sell him the exclusive distributership fro Western Austria?

Milo: We will get him on a moral turpatood claws.

Yossarium: <shifts uncomfortabley> Do we have one of thsoe?
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Cap Mandrake
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Do you know the way to Mandalay?

Post by Cap Mandrake »

Having trouble following the battle are you? Don't worry, so am I.

The noble attempt to recruit malaria victims for a counterattack from Myitkyina fails, but with 2 Chindit Brigades just arrived from Ledo, an Indian brigade mostly airlifted in, one stalwart Colonial brigade, and the 2 most enthusiastic Chinese divsions at Myitkyina, Burma Corps pushes west to aid the attack of British 2nd Infantry and 7th Armoured. After several days of maximal air effort, they attack 28th Division which has been left behind as a reaguard for the retreating Japanese forces. They come within a hair's breadth of driving the enemy back into the jungle toward Lashio, wrecking the division and linking with 2nd Division by rail (on my out of sync replay this actually happened 2 days in a row [:@]). Instead, they will have to recover a few days and try again, perhaps after the arrival of a full Indian Division coming down teh trail from Ledo.

Meanwhile, the Imphal arm of the pincer becomes separated. 2nd UK and the artillery leap ahead of 7th Armoured which is apprently still searching for fossils. Now there is a serious problem. Just when things were looking good, 2nd UK now faces 3 full Jap divisions plus armour and plenty of heavy artillery. 7th Armoured still appears 5 or 6 days out. All Allied air is ordered to attrit the Japs on the rail line. Disaster is avoided after an all-out enemy attack on the 24th. Will they have the strength for another attack today? I am pulling for Chennault and the 10th Air Force but the weather is bad. The Jap attack has also seriously depleted ammo for the 2nd UK Div which must be supplied by air in poor weather. If 2nd Div can hold again, the Burma Corps can likely drive off the 28th division, open the rail line to Myitkyina for British 2nd and 7th Armoured, then unite to push the Japs back to Mandalay. Honestly, this is going better than I expected. The whole thing was conceived simply to force a jap withdrawal from Myitkyina.

Too bad about Count Czernin. We could use his planning expertise about now.

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Cap Mandrake
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Aptitude

Post by Cap Mandrake »

I was looking for a commander for 224 Grp, RAF, in India. Though he was eventually undone by an exponential function, Sqdrn Leader Czernin was at least enthusiastic and had good air combat experience. The same cannot be said for all those in the pool of possible RAF HQ commanders.


*****************SEAC HQ, Ledo, October 24, 1942*****************

Gen. Pownall: Gentlemen, I'm looking for one among you to take over duties as commander of 224 Group. Are any among you up to the challenge? <as he finishes a Wellington bomber roars overhead at 200 ft on its way to bomb the rail line>

Brig. Gen. Oliver Wendall Trent, RAF: <Throws himself to the ground in terror. When the noise of the bomber subsides, he stands, a dark stain on the front of his trousers> Good Lord! Did any of you see that? It was a flying machine! Must be those boys at Bletchley. Nothing like a war to spur innovation, eh?



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DuckofTindalos
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RE: Aptitude

Post by DuckofTindalos »

Would he even be capable of identifying it as a flying machine? A large flying metal monster, perhaps?
We are all dreams of the Giant Space Butterfly.
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Cap Mandrake
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Hurry up..would you?

Post by Cap Mandrake »

..

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