Bring me the head of Diego Garcia...and the Mayor of Addu Atoll too!

[Cap Mandrake]

We have the smartest politicians in the world. I like to learn things from them. I was thinking of sending a taunting message to Rord Admirar Nerson and Rod Admirar Fabertong ..."Don't make us call our bluff" [:D]


What do you think? Pretty intimidating, eh?

Here is the air situation before Weasel. The ranges (and number of Jap fighters)will test the resources of the USAAF and RAAF in 8-42.

All the heavy bomber groups in the PTO (save for 38 B-17's at Suva) are in Oz, either at Alice (level 7) or Geraldton (Level 7). Meekathrurra is level 5. All the P-38's (48) in the PTO are also ready. Port Headland, Broome and Wyndham will have to be taken down a few notches to "safely" land at Port Headland and Broome. Darwin could host Netties but they would not be escorted. As Broome is discovered to have no fighter cover, I am sending in B-24's from Alice today. Maybe they will spread out their fighters a bit. Even with a level 7 field, all the B-24's at Alice can't operate at once due to stacking restrictions.

[Cap Mandrake]

An enigma I just thought of yesterday while listening to a 6 month old entertain himself.:

What did they call the "motorboat sound" before there were motorboats????

You think THAT makes your head hurt? Ask yourself this:

What if the "motorboat sound" were only invented AFTER the motorboat was invented???*


* Pleaase note the erudite use of the subjunctive tense to connote conditionality.

[Cap Mandrake]

I got a cold call from an attorney <crosses himself> from XXXXXXXX. She wanted a doctor outside the geographic area to review charts in an alleged malpractice case. As she was representing the defendant and it was right up my alley (the clinical situation not malpractice [:)]), I was favorably inclined. She wanted a CV (curriculum vitae not an aircraft carrier[:'(]) and a fee schedule.

"Fee schedule", I thought? How should I know? I thought about the corporate attorney who wanted to charge us $520 an hour to regurgitate his boiler plate forms and how annoyed that made me.

"350 an hour", I pretended to say confidently. She got really excited..no I mean REALLY excited like she had just found tickets to Disneyland or something.

"Great, I'll Fed Ex the chart over to you tomorrow". And that is exactly what they did. I think I underbid [:D] Guess I'll have to make up for it by thinking about the case when I am taking a shower (as is the standard practice at D,C&H, LLP.)

[Mynok]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
What did they call the "motorboat sound" before there were motorboats????

Camel farts.

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: Mynok

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
What did they call the "motorboat sound" before there were motorboats????

Camel farts.

I am not around camels much. Do they really keep going like a motorboat..or is it just like that if they get too many dates?

[anarchyintheuk]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

I got a cold call from an attorney <crosses himself> from XXXXXXXX. She wanted a doctor outside the geographic area to review charts in an alleged malpractice case. As she was representing the defendant and it was right up my alley (the clinical situation not malpractice [:)]), I was favorably inclined. She wanted a CV (curriculum vitae not an aircraft carrier[:'(]) and a fee schedule.

"Fee schedule", I thought? How should I know? I thought about the corporate attorney who wanted to charge us $520 an hour to regurgitate his boiler plate forms and how annoyed that made me.

"350 an hour", I pretended to say confidently. She got really excited..no I mean REALLY excited like she had just found tickets to Disneyland or something.

"Great, I'll Fed Ex the chart over to you tomorrow". And that is exactly what they did. I think I underbid [:D] Guess I'll have to make up for it by thinking about the case when I am taking a shower (as is the standard practice at D,C&H, LLP.)

Hopefully, you'll get deposed and add to them hours. Don't forget to keep a list of incurred expenses like chlorine for your hottub. You can say that reviewing the file in your hottub is necessary to your process.

[Mynok]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

ORIGINAL: Mynok

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
What did they call the "motorboat sound" before there were motorboats????

Camel farts.

I am not around camels much. Do they really keep going like a motorboat..or is it just like that if they get too many dates?

They do if you keep making the noise. [:'(]

[Cap Mandrake]

*********Bali Hai Dance Club, Perth, Sept. 13, 1942************


Young man in fine linen slacks:< looking at application> Says here you have been in the King's African Rifles for 5 weeks and have already made Sargeant. How did you manage that Sgt. Dada?

Intensely pigmented young man: I promoted myself. I am first African Sargeant in King's African Rifles. I will soon be Field Marshall.

Young man in fine linen slacks: Field Marshall? My, my, my. I love a man with enthusiasm. What can you do Sargeant?

Intensely pigmented young man: I can make the drinks.

Young man in fine linen slacks: <looks at application> But it says here you are Muslim?

Intensely pigmented young man: You hear Reform Judaism?

Young man in fine linen slacks: Yes, I belive I have.

Intensely pigmented young man: Well, I am Reform Muslim.

Young man in fine linen slacks: And the beliefs are?

Intensely pigmented young man: Same as regular but Reform Muslim allowed to drink alcohol. I kept part with many wives.

Young man in fine linen slacks: Splendid! Do you have a specialty drink then?

Intensely pigmented young man: Yes Black Mamba, one part gin, one part Rose's Lime and one drop Black Mamba venom.

Young man in fine linen slacks: That sounds dangerous.

Intensely pigmented young man: Yes, great kick but terrible hangover.........

[sprior]

JJ is getting saucy again. I wonder what these ALBs are up to:

[sprior]

Otter troops:

[sprior]

More pongoes:

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: sprior

JJ is getting saucy again. I wonder what these ALBs are up to:

I didn't see what you were talking about at first but there are indeed some ALB's in the jungle North of Shwebo. Looks like they are headed for that little burg across the Chindwin, Kalemyo.

I shouldn't worry. I am sure the couple of platoons of RAF security troops and a couple of Lewis guns we have there will hold them. [:)]In the mean time we can recon them and bomb them out of their little yellow skins as they cross the jungle at 4 miles per day (and fly a Bn or two of Sikhs or Hindus or, in a pinch, Muslims). If we have any Ghurkas that would be splendid!

This seems to be how the fighting in Burma goes. Sitzkrieg for months and then one side forgets how disastrous the last cross-jungle attack was and has another go at it.

[sprior]

Blenheims on their way to Dacca to slow them down, troops being deployed into the area.

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: anarchyintheuk


Hopefully, you'll get deposed

But I don't WANT to be deposed. I like being in charge of the Green Army men.

Don't forget to keep a list of incurred expenses like chlorine for your hottub. You can say that reviewing the file in your hottub is necessary to your process.

What if I go long and get a whole hot tub installed?

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: sprior

Blenheims on their way to Dacca to slow them down, troops being deployed into the area.

Yes, yes! Blacken the sky with Blenheims. They will soil their jungle fatigues.

[Itdepends]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
What if I go long and get a whole hot tub installed?

Only if you get the integrated waterproof laptop, document holder and lighting system.

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: Itdepends

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
What if I go long and get a whole hot tub installed?

Only if you get the integrated waterproof laptop, document holder and lighting system.

What? No drink holder?

I have been trying to get my older lab to lose weight so I cut back on her food. Don't think the message has not gotten through to her tiny little hypothalamus either. Today she ate two properly aged road apples and part of a 1 week old rabbit carcass while on her walk.

As for personal health, I have adopted the Surgeon General's recommendations re. 5 servings of fruit and vegetables per day. I now put a lemon quarter in every gin and tonic and have started using pimento-stuffed olives in my Martinis. Everybody likes to make fun of the Surgeon General but sometimes they get it right.

[khyberbill]

As for personal health, I have adopted the Surgeon General's recommendations re. 5 servings of fruit and vegetables per day. I now put a lemon quarter in every gin and tonic and have started using pimento-stuffed olives in my Martinis. Everybody likes to make fun of the Surgeon General but sometimes they get it right.

Don't forget some chocolate-nuts are good for you too!

[Cap Mandrake]

..death from above. I am speaking, of course, of Maj. Clark's 390th BS(M). They are new to combat and aren't even at full strength but they already do more damage than all the other medium bombers on Fiji combined. Hmmmm?

Their last attack on Nadi

Allied aircraft
A-29A Hudson x 6


No Allied losses

Japanese ground losses:
34 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 3 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 1 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled

[Cap Mandrake]

Same day, Same weather, same recon, same target. 21 B-26's

Allied aircraft
B-26 Marauder x 12
B-26B Marauder x 9


Allied aircraft losses
B-26 Marauder: 1 damaged
B-26B Marauder: 1 damaged

Japanese ground losses:
5 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 1 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled