Bring me the head of Diego Garcia...and the Mayor of Addu Atoll too!

[sprior]

Shes read that book a zillion times..

The mem-sahib tried to read it but thought it was crap. She wrote to the writer and asked for her money back. Unsurprisingly nothing came back.

[Chickenboy]

Not even a coupon good for one spanking, eh? What a rip-off.

[Crackaces]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Ensnared in my own trap.

I am at work and I apparently hit print while typing something on the AAR so 13 pages showed up on the work printer with "Hot Asian Action" at the top. The MA jsut brings it to me with the tripilcate Rx's I have to sign.

"Is this yours?" [:D][:D][:D]

Hmmmm I am envisioning the Cap involved in something akin to the "McMartin preschool trial" ..as Medical Assistants [MA's] all gather as witnesses at his trial .. "Yes, I too saw long lists of Asian Women with pictures! and I saw excerpts from that book '50 shades of grey' .... He told me that he is running an Asian SMBD escort ring!!! .... " ....Try and smile for your mug shot and not look like you just got up from an all night drinking binge. I would negoitate 8 hours a day access to a computer with AE loaded ... [:D]

[Cap Mandrake]

************Law and Order, Santa Ana*************


Lenny Briscoe: Mary, Kate, Val, Sally and especially Betty. I want faces for these victims! Let's do it people!

[Crackaces]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

************Law and Order, Santa Ana*************


Lenny Briscoe: Mary, Kate, Val, Sally and especially Betty. I want faces for these victims! Let's do it people!

Now all they have to do is find Pax Mundo's aviatar and you are doing 10 -20 with time off for good behavior .. [;)]

[sprior]

Bigjigs Railways (sadly you read it right) bid for UK rail franchise

[CaptDave]

Too bad the franchise went back to Virgin. First Group may be far from perfect, but from the standpoint of someone who visits the country and uses a Railpass they're the best available (at least since the demise of GNER). Virgin, on the other hand and to use a more-British-than-American adjective, is simply horrid!

[BBfanboy]

ORIGINAL: sprior

Bigjigs Railways (sadly you read it right) bid for UK rail franchise

From the article: "They proposed a “fair fare” for the line’s 31 million passengers as “our trains are run on enjoyment and so our service will be FREE”.
I wonder if this [enjoyment] is in reference to the beds they also propose to install? Perhaps the Wax On, Wax Off heading should be changed to Hot and Wet British Action, the wet part in reference to the heavy rains recently?
At any rate, I am sure the Minister could not approve the bid since his campaign contributions include a significant "Thomas the Tank Engine" donation. Sir Topham Hat is watching ...

[neilm85uk_MatrixForum]

ORIGINAL: BBfanboy

ORIGINAL: sprior

Bigjigs Railways (sadly you read it right) bid for UK rail franchise

From the article: "They proposed a “fair fare” for the line’s 31 million passengers as “our trains are run on enjoyment and so our service will be FREE”.
I wonder if this [enjoyment] is in reference to the beds they also propose to install? Perhaps the Wax On, Wax Off heading should be changed to Hot and Wet British Action, the wet part in reference to the heavy rains recently?
At any rate, I am sure the Minister could not approve the bid since his campaign contributions include a significant "Thomas the Tank Engine" donation. Sir Topham Hat is watching ...

Not recently - continuously. Otherwise excellent

[dcpollay]

Maybe the "Wet" reference is to the fact that the customers are about to get hosed?

[zuluhour]

I believe the transcript here in would out sell anything I saw on the paperback shelf at the grocery store; what else can you do at the grocery store when the wife asks you to go find some ripe melons?

[sprior]

Seen on the back of a dirty van:

I wish my wife was this dirty

In different handwriting:

She is

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: sprior

Seen on the back of a dirty van:

I wish my wife was this dirty

In different handwriting:

She is

Imagine the shame. First you discover your wife is peripatetic and then you discover your original scribbling called for the subjunctive tense.

[Cap Mandrake]

*********"Share Day", SGJr(IV)'s neighboring first grade class***********


Imagine you you bring in your Tickle Me Pink Elmo doll to share and the kid before you has his dad bring in the ACTUAL FREAKIN' STANLEY CUP!


"Hory crap!"

[Cap Mandrake]

************************March 7, 1943(c)********************

Sorong: 2 days ago there was a flicker of intel about a sindle DD SW of Peleliu..so the AP's waiting to embark some combat engineers were sent back to Boela....and extra TBF's brought in.....then...nothing the next day. NOW they show up. It's Joe Isuzu again. I HATE that guy.

Night Time Surface Combat, near Sorong at 82,107, Range 2,000 Yards

Japanese Ships
CL Isuzu
DD Kuroshio
DD Usugumo

Allied Ships
SC PC-578, Shell hits 3, and is sunk
SC PC-1078, Shell hits 17, and is sunk

It's good PT boat weather and moonlight....but...Whatever their intent, no real damage done.

Night Time Surface Combat, near Sorong at 82,107, Range 2,000 Yards

Japanese Ships
CL Isuzu
DD Kuroshio
DD Usugumo

Allied Ships
PT-188
PT-190
PT-196
PT-222
PT-223
PT-295

[Cap Mandrake]

Manado: USS Washington wouldn't rearm with her 30% system damage so we sent in Hobart. It was a night not many Japanese will soon forget, I tell you, no siree........

Night Naval bombardment of Manado at 75,99

Allied Ships
CL Hobart



Runway hits 2

[Cap Mandrake]

San Jose (the one on Panay, not in California): I gave up further unloading at Taytay for now as the troops there are in good supply (though 50% disrupted). I figure 1 1/2 Bn of infantry can hold indefinitely unless JJ brings up help. USS Phoenix was sent to San Jose to prevent any kind of landing to take back San Jose (LYB ships, possibly transports were near the Surigao Strait to the East.


FO Downing, No. 118 Sqdrn, RCAF..."They came out of the sun at us..must have been a dozen or more, screaming like banshees in their dives..."


Morning Air attack on TF, near San Jose at 78,84

Weather in hex: Heavy cloud

Raid detected at 63 NM, estimated altitude 8,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 34 minutes

Japanese aircraft
F1M2 Pete x 6



Allied aircraft
Hurricane XIIb x 13
F4F-4 Wildcat x 9


Japanese aircraft losses
F1M2 Pete: 4 destroyed

No Allied losses

FO Downing, No. 118 Sqdrn, RCAF..."In the afternoon, JJ came back. This time in bombers that bristled with machine guns. Must have been a hundred if there were ten........."


Afternoon Air attack on TF, near San Jose at 78,84

Weather in hex: Light rain

Raid detected at 66 NM, estimated altitude 9,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 19 minutes

Japanese aircraft
Ki-21-IIa Sally x 26



Allied aircraft
Hurricane XIIb x 12
F4F-4 Wildcat x 9


Japanese aircraft losses
Ki-21-IIa Sally: 15 destroyed, 2 damaged
Ki-21-IIa Sally: 1 destroyed by flak

No Allied losses

Allied Ships
CL Denver

[Chickenboy]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

*********"Share Day", SGJr(IV)'s neighboring first grade class***********


Imagine you you bring in your Tickle Me Pink Elmo doll to share and the kid before you has his dad bring in the ACTUAL FREAKIN' STANLEY CUP!


"Hory crap!"

The roots of these feelings of inadequacy will cost you tens of thousands in therapist bills, Cap'n.

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

*********"Share Day", SGJr(IV)'s neighboring first grade class***********


Imagine you you bring in your Tickle Me Pink Elmo doll to share and the kid before you has his dad bring in the ACTUAL FREAKIN' STANLEY CUP!


"Hory crap!"

The roots of these feelings of inadequacy will cost you tens of thousands in therapist bills, Cap'n.

Hey, I'm still trying to get over the trauma of winning "Most Improved" on my Pop Warner team...TWO YEARS IN A ROW!

If the kid in front of me on share day brought his REAL NHL STAR DAD WITH THE REAL NHL STANLEY CUP I would have had the sense to just lie down under the bus wheels and save the therapist bills.

[Cap Mandrake]

Cagayan (de Oro no de Plomo): It appears the IJA has no answer for the behemoth that is the Stuart. We should have ourselves a good port and airfield on Mindanao shortly.

Ground combat at Cagayan (79,89)

Allied Shock attack

Attacking force 1110 troops, 0 guns, 156 vehicles, Assault Value = 83

Defending force 1235 troops, 20 guns, 0 vehicles, Assault Value = 41

Allied adjusted assault: 35

Japanese adjusted defense: 27

Allied assault odds: 1 to 1 (fort level 0)

Allied Assault reduces fortifications to 0

Combat modifiers
Defender: terrain(+), preparation(-), experience(-)
Attacker: op mode(-), shock(+), leaders(+), fatigue(-)

Japanese ground losses:
174 casualties reported
Squads: 2 destroyed, 20 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled



Assaulting units:
1st USMC Tank Battalion

Defending units:
Yokosuka 1st SNLF
16th Naval Guard Unit