Bring me the head of Diego Garcia...and the Mayor of Addu Atoll too!

[uncivil_servant]

"The whole time Pearl Harbor was guarded by 12 P-40B's and some Brewsters."

Actually shouldn't that be 12 P-40s and their brewski's as 12 drunk P-40 pilots willing to now charge head first into combat is considerably more effective than sober P-40 and Brewster combined?

[Cap Mandrake]

Sitting in my office doing crap to make the government happy and I hear my colleague ask one of the young female medical assistants, "Come with me, I need your magic tongue right away". [X(][:-]


After a second or two of disorientation I realize he wants her to help translate and was just trying to be clever...but...Santa Maria!

[Cap Mandrake]

Four year old is anxious to talk because her brother is getting his ears checked and she wants to be the center of attention.

4 year old: Doctor, doctor, doctor!

FAM: Yes?

4 year old: <proudly> I have a hole in my nose! Watch! <buries her finger up to the second knuckle> [:D][:D]


She's probably a future orhtopedic surgeon. [:)]

[poodlebrain]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Four year old is anxious to talk because her brother is getting his ears checked and she wants to be the center of attention.

4 year old: Doctor, doctor, doctor!

FAM: Yes?

4 year old: <proudly> I have a hole in my nose! Watch! <buries her finger up to the second knuckle> [:D][:D]


She's probably a future orhtopedic surgeon. [:)]

Would it be inappropriate to make a reference to the Shocker and Baffins Bridge, given the fingers inserted into an orifice, since it was a 4 year-old doing the insertion?

[sprior]

I'm guessing, "Yes".

[Cap Mandrake]

I'm going to guess yes as well.........that is, unless you want to meet the FBI guys in your area.

[pws1225]

This whole thread has taken a nasty turn. Can someone simply go sink something?

[zuluhour]

Perhaps just a probing attack

[poodlebrain]

I think they already have me under surveillance for frequenting suspicious website akin to this one.

[Chickenboy]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Four year old is anxious to talk because her brother is getting his ears checked and she wants to be the center of attention.

4 year old: Doctor, doctor, doctor!

FAM: Yes?

4 year old: <proudly> I have a hole in my nose! Watch! <buries her finger up to the second knuckle> [:D][:D]


She's probably a future orhtopedic surgeon. [:)]

Definitely a surgeon of some sort...

[Cap Mandrake]

If I stop posting for more than 1 week, someone call the Orange County Sherff Dept.


I have to get Stalker Girl to sign a waiver to make my kids (and not her) beneficiaries for my 401-K in case I get hit by an asteroid..

Now, we addressed this in our prenup but the 401-K guy thinks it wont hold up. This could go badly. [:D]

Of course, my real goal is to spend it all but one might get caught flat footed.


Let's say I'm out walking the dogs and I hear this whistling sound. I look up and there is a 100 m nickel-iron meteor bearing down on at 12,000 mph. Uselss to run. I imagine I would say..."Oh s***, my 401-k!"

[zuluhour]

You southern Cali folk are so easily star struck.[:D]

[Itdepends]

Seriously Cap I'm not sure why you'd worry about that. The odds of being hit by a nickel-iron a pretty low, stoney's are much more common.

[Chickenboy]

In the tragic event that you should be crushed by a meteorite, could you please provide us with SG's phone number beforehand? We need to comfort her in her time of need. And help with that 401-k distribution.

[poodlebrain]

For tax purposes you should consider making your kids beneficiaries of life insurance policies and spouse beneficiary of 401(k). If beneficiaries of the 401(k), your kids will have to take distributions over 3 years and the distributions are taxable to them at their marginal tax rates. Your surviving spouse can defer distributions until age 70-1/2, and she can spread the distributions over her remaining expected life while being consoled by whatever lothario might cross her path.

[zuluhour]

Geeez I was plastered last night.....

[Cap Mandrake]

Is a "Lothario" a vehicle for tax avoidance? I thought that was the name of one of those I-tay divisions in North Africa?

[witpqs]

I was searching the forums to find member "Lothario".

[Cap Mandrake]

Admirar Rord Fabertong is back from his trip with Lief Ericson (they turned around..no visas for Vineland)...but now, Rord Admirar Nerson has evidentry been captured by a Kiowa raiding party

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: Itdepends

Seriously Cap I'm not sure why you'd worry about that. The odds of being hit by a nickel-iron a pretty low, stoney's are much more common.

[:D]