Bring me the head of Diego Garcia...and the Mayor of Addu Atoll too!

[sprior]

They're Fleet Air Arm old boy, pas de crabs s'il vous plait.

And yes, there will be a bottle of the old red biddy sunk tonight.

[Chickenboy]

ORIGINAL: sprior

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

ORIGINAL: sprior
Harrier pilot's eye view of take off:

Is that from the deck of one of those old-fangled things that you lot don't have any more?

It is. Having invested the angled flight deck, the mirror landing system and arrester wires we've decided they're all old hat now.

I see. And having naught is the new OOB?

[Chickenboy]

ORIGINAL: moore4807
Congrats on the major step towards independence for DU.

Aye. Now if there could be a scuttling of the toe rag, all could be square.

[sprior]

Polish your periscope sir?

[Cap Mandrake]

Up periscope!

Is there any truth to the rumor that Japan-mens periscopes were shorter?

I'll ask Stalker Girl. See if she knows. She knows naval history pretty well.

[Cap Mandrake]

**********Truk Lagoon, aboard I-35************


<A well tanned Japanese officer clinbs to the open bridge. His progress is impeded by a large contingent of the crew who are crowded above. He pushes his way upward.>

Cpt Ito: What-ah you idiots doing? Japan-sairor-mens supposed to work on batteries and porish brass. <he grances upward to see a cute Porynesian woman porishing periscope...in a skirt...the Porynesian woman not the periscope>

<FACE PAHM

[Cap Mandrake]

Is I-35 right? Anyone remember what sub Cpt. Ito was on?

Somebody should write this stuff down.

[Cap Mandrake]

*************Commandant's Quarters, Miri, July 5, 1943(c)*************


Young man in fine linen slacks: Look, Col. we can go 5.25%, but it has to be net, not gross. You never know what kind of taxes those bastards will lay on. You could live like a king on Tanna for that. Also, I don't have to remind you what will eventually happen to you if you don't accept. Do you realize how many soldiers and Marines there are on Luzon now?

Col. Saito: <appears to be weighing offer> Hmmmm...do you have pictures of Tanna-womans?

[Cap Mandrake]

The day after I got a recruitment letter to be a 4 star general in the Air Force, SG got one too.


Maybe we could ask to be posted together.[:D]

[Cap Mandrake]

************Miro's Sushi Breastaurant, Karenko***********


Yes man officer from SWPAC: Sir, Gen. MacArthur would like to know if you would be interested in I Corps command on Okinawa?

Gen. Wainwright (now looking less skeletal and wearing an apron with the M&M log): MacArthur you said?

Yes man officer from SWPAC: Yes sir, General Douglas MacArthur.

Gen. Wainwright (now looking less skeletal and wearing an apron with the M&M log): No...no...not really. Ok, who had the California roll?

[witpqs]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Is I-35 right? Anyone remember what sub Cpt. Ito was on?

Somebody should write this stuff down.

Something Milo sold him.

[poodlebrain]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

************Miro's Sushi Breastaurant, Karenko***********


Yes man officer from SWPAC: Sir, Gen. MacArthur would like to know if you would be interested in I Corps command on Okinawa?

Gen. Wainwright (now looking less skeletal and wearing an apron with the M&M log): MacArthur you said?

Yes man officer from SWPAC: Yes sir, General Douglas MacArthur.

Gen. Wainwright (now looking less skeletal and wearing an apron with the M&M log): No...no...not really. Ok, who had the California roll?

Poor Wainwright can't catch a break. I hope he is not working for tips.

[sprior]

Nice day for a walk by the sea.

[sprior]

In case you were wondering what the first big kerfuffle was all about: http://themetapicture.com/if-wwi-was-a-bar-fight/

[Cap Mandrake]

That would be the bar fight to end all bar fights. I think I was supposed to read Guns of August once but never did.

I am now ready for my history test Mr. deMille

[Cap Mandrake]

So, you are not going to believe this story in all likelihood. I hardly believe it and I'm the one making it up.

Two weeks ago, one of the destructor crew didn't show up for a week. My brother, who is serving as the architect, and is good friends with the contractor called me about an architectural decision And just happened to mention that one of the guys had been arrested for an outstanding traffic warrant and was a guest of the county for a week. It was a funny story and it was expertly delivered. The only problem is it was a cover story so I wouldn't get ticked off.

So last night stalker girl Has a couple of martinis straight up with olives and tells me, "you have to promise not to tell anyone"

I answered,, "tell them what?"

By Answering with a question I have not technically promised anything. Stalker girl does not pick up on the subtlety Because of the two martinis.

(To be continued when I can use the laptop because it's driving me nuts trying to do this on the iPhone)

[sprior]

THE laptop? I thought you scab lifters were rich?

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: sprior

THE laptop? I thought you scab lifters were rich?

I think you are confusing me with old widda' Smith or perhaps Pocahontas girl or perhaps the new guy with a $10,000 mailbox or perhaps Mr. Chang or perhaps Mr. Chopra with the Bentley that he drives 100 yards to the mailbox.

This window repair and balcony repair and painting thing is costing $4000 a week plus materials so we are living on Kraft macaroni and cheese and martinis at this point.

[witpqs]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

ORIGINAL: sprior

THE laptop? I thought you scab lifters were rich?

I think you are confusing me with old widda' Smith or perhaps Pocahontas girl or perhaps the new guy with a $10,000 mailbox or perhaps Mr. Chang or perhaps Mr. Chopra with the Bentley that he drives 100 yards to the mailbox.

This window repair and balcony repair and painting thing is costing $4000 a week plus materials so we are living on Kraft macaroni and cheese and martinis at this point.

Four Grand a week? So you adopted them.

[Cap Mandrake]

So anyway, back to the story. One day when the crew is here and it was hot I took out some ice water for them. The next day I noticed stalker girl Junior was Serving them cokes and pretty soon i Half a case of Negra Modelo disappeared. So I'm thinking this hospitality will be good for morale and maybe cause them to work harder as long as nobody Cuts their finger off with a power saw,

It turns out we were barely scratching the surface hospitality wise. You see, the story that was revealed to me after a couple of martinis was that stalker girl Junior had dumped her illegal alien boyfriend and now had the hots for Angel. Angel is the guy who was supposed to been a guest of the county. In fact while they were here working, angel and stalker girl Junior were halfway to the horizontal lambada and got caught by the boss. So the boss sends it home without pay for the day and suspends in for a week and enlists my brother to come up with a cover story so they all don't get fired. It worked pretty damn well until stalker girl Junior told stalker girl who told me,

Neither stocker girl or a liar too worried about it because we're both happy she got rid of her illegal alien boyfriend. I used to call her legally only boyfriend little Ricky. the guy would sneak into the house at night and stay over here. One time I even found he was having mail delivered here. Angel is at least a citizen and has a good job, working for me, even though his personality doesn't quite fit his name,

I think the best thing to do here is stop buying the Negra Modelo and pretend like I didn't hear anything.