A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere

[Cap Mandrake]

**********Feb. 6, 1942(d)*********

2 days in row, Hiryu miss damaged Austraria-mens CL somewhere in Corar Sea.

KB move down near to New Zearand to see if catch anything at Auckrand. Apparentry not. Arso covering randing at Norfork Isrand. This go werr. No white devirs.

[Cap Mandrake]

Suva: New Zearand-mens about ready to crack. Japan-mens take day off to wash baggy underwears.

[sprior]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Mandrake-san go to rabia supermarket once. Auntie Wong's Dance Emporium in Bangkok. Pretty fun.

Ah yes, Auntie Wongs - so-called because can't go wong there. At reast not with enough yen.

[Cap Mandrake]

Oz: White devirs abandon Bundaberg. This-ah big surprise. Probabry they worry aboat navarh bombardment or they spot Japan-mens recon pranes ovah Maryborough and worry that Japan-mens rand behind them which was exacatarry what pranning.

Not-ah sure what arr of white devirs doing in woods W of Bundaberg

[sprior]

White devirs in woods crapping

[Chickenboy]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Mandrake-san go to rabia supermarket once. Auntie Wong's Dance Emporium in Bangkok. Pretty fun.

Bangkok? Hope-ah not too badry?

[Chickenboy]

Chickenboy-san want to know which prace crazier: The area around Crark airbase (prior to 1990s crosure), Bangkok or Singapore? Tough choice...

ETA: No-ah recommend rooking pictures of Angeres city from work. [X(]

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: sprior

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Mandrake-san go to rabia supermarket once. Auntie Wong's Dance Emporium in Bangkok. Pretty fun.

Ah yes, Auntie Wongs - so-called because can't go wong there. At reast not with enough yen.

Hai! That-ah thing about China-womans. Nevah stop tarking but rearry good at business. Crappy drivuhs too. Armost as bad as Korea-womans.

[Cap Mandrake]

Editrix Note: I would warn the participants, the patience of the editorial board is NOT without its limits. Neither will the punsihment be light if consistent policy violations continue. This kind of late Pleistocene ribald material would have been rejected by Lenny Bruce.

[Cap Mandrake]

Hai! This-ah make The Interview rook rike scripted by Mistah Noerh Coward.

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: sprior

White devirs in woods crapping

**************25 m W of Bundaberg, a wooded area, formerly pristine**********


18 Div, Chief Medical Officuh, Irish guy: <sniffs> Sweet Baby Jesus and the Virgin Mary! Oh dear, it's cholera, I'm afraid. Please tell me you followed my order not to serve any more raw oysters......

[Cap Mandrake]

*************Seaside Virra, Truk Ragoon************


FAM: <reading documents> Hory crap! Hearth code vioration. From Queensrand Hearth Department? What-ah Herr is Queensrand?

Jimmy "Too Tarr": In Austraria, sir. It seems there was some type of irregarh discahrge of ravatory waste from Nagato during bombardment.

FAM:Oh yeah? Werr, Queensrand Hearth Department can stick up fine where sun not-ah shine. It-ah Goddman war. If Queensrand Hearth Department think this-ah bad, wait tirr Jpaan-mens brow up Brisbane.

[Mike McCreery]

Dont even get me started on the Geradton HOA :]

[sprior]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Editrix Note: I would warn the participants, the patience of the editorial board is NOT without its limits. Neither will the punsihment be light if consistent policy violations continue. This kind of late Pleistocene ribald material would have been rejected by Lenny Bruce.

Broody herr! Run out of prasticine. Wirr Pray-Doh do?

[alaviner]

ORIGINAL: sprior

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Editrix Note: I would warn the participants, the patience of the editorial board is NOT without its limits. Neither will the punsihment be light if consistent policy violations continue. This kind of late Pleistocene ribald material would have been rejected by Lenny Bruce.

Broody herr! Run out of prasticine. Wirr Pray-Doh do?

Me thinks Silly-Putty would be a bedder sustitute.

[Cap Mandrake]

Burma: SPrior-san bombard Rangoon rast night with cruisers. Brow things up pretty good but Mikuma
hit-ah mine and herr of ort of watah come in. Imperiar Guards Division and 3 regiments or artirrary arrive at Rangoon and not even tired.

Whoevah Engrish generarh at Rangoon probabry have to wash underwear..or perhaps have varet with brown skin do it.

Possiburh inbound Royarh Navy near Andaman Isrand

[Cap Mandrake]

***********Sick Bay************

<14 y/o is not eating breakfast when he takes his ADD meds so he is losing weight. He is sitting on the table with his usual sullen look. Mom is in the room and 8 year old sister>

FAM: So tell me why you are having trouble eating breakfast.

Sullen 14 year old: Well, on Tuesday I have zero period. It starts at 6:45 so I have to get up at 5:45. It's cold so I can't do my hair.....

<now, so far he is making a pretty good case because 5:45 is torture for a 14 year old....and doing hsi hair might seem trivial to us but not a 14 year old.......but he has a hole card he hasn't played yet..he continues>

.....and I always have morning wood [:D][:D]

[sprior]

We capture Rangoon. Arries run away!

[Lecivius]

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

Chickenboy-san want to know which prace crazier: The area around Crark airbase (prior to 1990s crosure), Bangkok or Singapore? Tough choice...

ETA: No-ah recommend rooking pictures of Angeres city from work. [X(]

O city [X(][8|]

[Cap Mandrake]

********Airfield, Port Blair, Andaman Is., Feb. 8, 1942(d)********

<a squadron of PB4Y are being armed each with a dozen angry looking 5.25 inch rockets. A crate is stenciled "M&MAR--M&M Aircraft Rockets--DO NOT DROP IF YOU KNOW WHAT IS GOOD FOR YOU">

Extremely confident young sergeant in nicely pressed uniform: ....right, so we recommend a glide attack at 30 degree from 1000 ft and when the reticule lines up you let them go..provided you are in range.

Pilot: How do we know we are in range.

Extremely confident young sergeant in nicely pressed uniform: Right, if you take blast or shrapnel damage from your weapons then you were too close. Any other questions?....Good, now remember those golf course lots for any crew that achieve more than 30% hits.