A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere

[sprior]

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
Suddenry SG-IV get wierd rook on face and stop to eat steak. Mandrake-san fix emergency by eating rest of steak.

That broody quick thinking - good man to have in emergency

[Cap Mandrake]

*********Seaside Virra*************


FAM: <having Kobe steak and beer captured in Rockhampton> Why nevah see Mohammaden bath house? Beacuse everyone get-ah grossed out during prayers. Hahahahahahaha.....What-ah probrem. How come nobody raugh?

Jimmy "too tarr": It-ah good joke boss but just have training session from Southern Army Human Resource trainer, Mrs. Hata. Mrs. Hata say cannot raugh at jokes about womans or othah peopurh in Co-Prosperity Sphere.

FAM: Oh, come on! What-ah point of wah if not arrowed have a rittah fun?

[Anachro]

This AAR gives me a headache. [:)]

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: Anachro

This AAR gives me a headache. [:)]

Hai! Anachro-san think reading about everything go wrong bad? Try to figure out how Japan-mens economy work. That-ah what give headache. [:)]

[T Rav]

Captain,

Once again, the jokes come off even better when spoken in pidgin engrish.

T Rav

[sprior]

Broody herr, I think rike this at work sometimes. It no good when deproying SQR

[Cap Mandrake]

Hai! It-ah very difficurt not-ah say "Broody Herr" or "Hai!" in everyday conversation.

One time Mandrake-san go to party and hostesses give everyone stick on name tag say "Harro, my name". Everyone supposed write in name. Mandrake-san bored so write in "Sergei" and pretend rike architect from Minsk entire party. It-ah amazing how nice American-mens and American-womans try to be when not-ah speak Engrish werr. Of course, everyone sound rike comprete ididots. Mandrake-san tark to two America-womans and pretend not-ah know common word for breastesses. Instead Mandrake-san say "BOO-soms" rike guy from Minsk. At first America-womans not-ah figure out what-ah Mandrake-san mean so Mandrake-san make universarh sign for breastesses. You know, rike two upturned cupped hands herd in front of chest.

America-womans both say, "Oooooh, you mean breasts?"

Mandrake-san rook down at breastesses, make cupping sign and say, "DA! Breastesses! Thank you! Sergei learn many Engrish words tonight"

[Cap Mandrake]

Ratah, Mandrake-san exprain what-ah hahppen with Sergei sticker.

[Cap Mandrake]

*****************Aprir 25, 1942(d)***************

B-17's go back to night attacks.

Night Air attack on Bundaberg , at 96,155

Weather in hex: Severe storms

Raid spotted at 16 NM, estimated altitude 14,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 4 minutes

Japanese aircraft
no flights

Allied aircraft
B-17E Fortress x 6

No Japanese losses

No Allied losses

Runway hits 6

[Cap Mandrake]

3 BB''s brow up tremendous numbers of Arried-dogs. Arready some of Arried-dogs start move-ah back West. Japan-mens position at Marysborough safe for now.

Night Naval bombardment of Maryborough at 96,157

Japanese Ships
BB Hyuga
BB Ise
BB Mutsu
DD Yuzuki
DD Samidare
DD Yudachi

Allied ground losses:
617 casualties reported
Squads: 3 destroyed, 18 disabled
Non Combat: 20 destroyed, 30 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 4 disabled
Guns lost 23 (5 destroyed, 18 disabled)
Vehicles lost 25 (8 destroyed, 17 disabled)

Airbase hits 8
Runway hits 34
Port hits 12
Port fuel hits 1
Port supply hits 4

[Cap Mandrake]

Japan-mens try to brow up Brisbane. Arried-dogs have so many mens at Brisbane ships not-ah fire on airfierd.

Night Naval bombardment of Brisbane at 96,160 - Coastal Guns Fire Back!

68 Coastal gun shots fired in defense.

Japanese Ships
CA Furutaka
CA Kumano
DD Sanae
DD Suzukaze
DD Hayashio, Shell hits 4, on fire

Allied ground losses:
215 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 3 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 21 disabled
Engineers: 1 destroyed, 3 disabled

[Cap Mandrake]

Rosses of big ships rast 2 months. Very, very one sided. The rower box show rosses since start of Arried-dogs offensive in Austraria.

[Cap Mandrake]

DD rosses since Arried-dog offensive in Austraria. 8 to 5 in favor of Arried-dogs. Essentiarry Japan-mens trade DD's and airpranes for CA's and BB's

[Cap Mandrake]

Arso today, Arried-dogs unequivocarry spot Soryu near Oosthaven and spot giant group transports move North near Victoria Point.

[Cap Mandrake]

Mandrake-san predict Arried-mens know something up.

[Cap Mandrake]

..

[T Rav]

Is that Ms. Rodham's sister? I don't know...

[Cap Mandrake]

ORIGINAL: T Rav

Is that Ms. Rodham's sister? I don't know...

Werr, both either have or hope to be coronated.

[Cap Mandrake]

FRENCH PRODUCT ENDORSEMENT SEGMENT*

Crappy:





* The editorial board strongly opposed the introduction of crass materialism but the accountants told us we had to.

[Mike McCreery]

I have no idea what is happening in the game.

It does not make this AAR less enjoyable however.

CARRY ON :}!!!