Newsflash ****
4000 points of Nationalist spanish troops have invaded the Netherlands. It seems that Franco has sent in General Rbrunsman to reopen hostilities with the Netherlands after several centuries of peace. The traitors now are claiming that since Spain is a Republic (A dictatorship in our opinion -ed) no Spanish king had the authority to sign the peace treaty of Westfalen (1648).
The dutch army, still heavily suffering from years of pacifistic politicians has mobilised in haste.
It is said that despite pleas from Col. van Bolhuis for starting the fight in defensive posture the high command has ordered to take a high ridge in contested area (Meeting engagement).
A hastily assembled taskforce (True troop/rarity on) has started for the hills.
Undertrained, Underarmed, the dutch army is clearly in a precarious position, but the man are determined to let the country survive, even if it will take another eighty years and even if we'll have to activate the ancient tradition of financing the war effort by selling weapons to the Spanish and then capturing their supply depots.
Franko starts an 80 year war... (PBEM WC)
Moderator: MOD_SPWaW
The Re-Integration of the Lowlands to the Greater Spanish Empire
The lawfully appointed Head of Government and Commander of the Military of the Empire of Spain, General Francisco Franco (el Caudillo), has determined that it is time for Spain to regain its position as a major Power in Europe and the World! Now that the small matter of dealing with the Republicans (along with their Communist masters) has been accomplished, it is time to punish those that opposed our Nationalist movement. Do not deny, Col. van Bolhuis, that the Netherlands aided the Republicans. It is now your turn to witness the might of Spain!
El Caudillo has decided to begin the Empire building by Re-Integrating Spain's Lost Provinces under his control first. Since the despised Peace of Westphalia, have the Lowlands been hiding behind the might of France, but el Caudillo believes the French are now weak and the time is ripe for conquest. I, General rbrunsman (Bob), have been tasked with the Reclaimation of the Netherlands. I will personally bring the "Prinsenvlag" of your capital to el Caudillo as evidence of the beginning of the glorious Re-Building of the Spanish Empire.
Personally, I would have rather waited until our industrial might could have had more time to build for war. However, since Germany has in the last week gobbled up Poland, it appears that the Strong (Spain) must act and the Weak (Netherlands) will be consumed sooner than expected.
Prepare to face the might (such as it is in 1939 :rolleyes: ) of the Spanish Juggernaught commanded by Bob.:p
El Caudillo has decided to begin the Empire building by Re-Integrating Spain's Lost Provinces under his control first. Since the despised Peace of Westphalia, have the Lowlands been hiding behind the might of France, but el Caudillo believes the French are now weak and the time is ripe for conquest. I, General rbrunsman (Bob), have been tasked with the Reclaimation of the Netherlands. I will personally bring the "Prinsenvlag" of your capital to el Caudillo as evidence of the beginning of the glorious Re-Building of the Spanish Empire.
Personally, I would have rather waited until our industrial might could have had more time to build for war. However, since Germany has in the last week gobbled up Poland, it appears that the Strong (Spain) must act and the Weak (Netherlands) will be consumed sooner than expected.
Prepare to face the might (such as it is in 1939 :rolleyes: ) of the Spanish Juggernaught commanded by Bob.:p
Everyone is a potential [PBEM] enemy, every place a potential [PBEM] battlefield. --Zensunni Wisdom
----Technical Difficulties----:o
(What did you expect in 1939 Spain?)
---- Please Stand By ----
(The Netherlands will have to wait a while longer before being brought into the fold of the New Spanish Empire.)
(What did you expect in 1939 Spain?)
---- Please Stand By ----
(The Netherlands will have to wait a while longer before being brought into the fold of the New Spanish Empire.)
Everyone is a potential [PBEM] enemy, every place a potential [PBEM] battlefield. --Zensunni Wisdom
Technical difficulties
As an example of the difficulties the Dutch High Command runs in to, lets take a look at the pre-bombardment.
There are several nice high hills on the map that would make a perfect spotting location. Those hills are however unseasonably dry so High Command decided to give them some rain in order to convince the spaniards that they don't want this piece of real estate, too (many) wet (pants).
Lo and Behold, what happens? Some rooky artillerist, probably fresh from the farm, just finished "shuffling **** in Arizona" switches the HE with smoke grenades :rolleyes:
A well now the spanish will have to come a bit closer to take a good look at the landscape
There are several nice high hills on the map that would make a perfect spotting location. Those hills are however unseasonably dry so High Command decided to give them some rain in order to convince the spaniards that they don't want this piece of real estate, too (many) wet (pants).
Lo and Behold, what happens? Some rooky artillerist, probably fresh from the farm, just finished "shuffling **** in Arizona" switches the HE with smoke grenades :rolleyes:
A well now the spanish will have to come a bit closer to take a good look at the landscape
Smoke and fire
Well it seems the smoke has had some effect, we got complaints from the spanish general, a renegade american :p about spoiling the view.
Apparently the general isn't quite in agreement with his own troops for several mortars and a motorcyclist added some more smoke of their own. But then with those morrocan troops you (can) have, those are probably smoking a wild pipe...
Meanwhile it rains down fire, several 100 mm batteries are battering either our lines or empty space (This particular set ofinformation doesn't want to be free
)
A few casualties arise from this poisoned rain. Col. van Bolhuis surveys the damage and advises HQ to send his opponent the required forms for filling out an Environmental Impact Report.
Few spanish oathbreakers are seen. In the north a MC squad was spotted, probably bringing an invitation for a BBQ. Other troops are riding in on the meat necessary for this feast..
BTW my dear opponent, have you seen that wet and depressed area marked "Polder?" That is no polder. A real polder is much worse. Imagine wading through hipdeep to breastdeep water, deep ditches at irregular interval, barbed wire, and fences thrown in for good measure and several MG emplacements coordinating your arrival.
And if you'd threaten to break through anyway, we can always raise the waterlevel with 2 meters. Can you swim with all your equipment? Thought not.
That is the country you'll encounter should you succeed in getting past me
You will long for the pleasant and amiable battles with the international brigade in Spain.
So go home while you still are ahead.
Apparently the general isn't quite in agreement with his own troops for several mortars and a motorcyclist added some more smoke of their own. But then with those morrocan troops you (can) have, those are probably smoking a wild pipe...
Meanwhile it rains down fire, several 100 mm batteries are battering either our lines or empty space (This particular set ofinformation doesn't want to be free
)A few casualties arise from this poisoned rain. Col. van Bolhuis surveys the damage and advises HQ to send his opponent the required forms for filling out an Environmental Impact Report.
Few spanish oathbreakers are seen. In the north a MC squad was spotted, probably bringing an invitation for a BBQ. Other troops are riding in on the meat necessary for this feast..
BTW my dear opponent, have you seen that wet and depressed area marked "Polder?" That is no polder. A real polder is much worse. Imagine wading through hipdeep to breastdeep water, deep ditches at irregular interval, barbed wire, and fences thrown in for good measure and several MG emplacements coordinating your arrival.
And if you'd threaten to break through anyway, we can always raise the waterlevel with 2 meters. Can you swim with all your equipment? Thought not.
That is the country you'll encounter should you succeed in getting past me
You will long for the pleasant and amiable battles with the international brigade in Spain.
So go home while you still are ahead.
"Unseasonably dry"??!! It's raining cats and dogs over here! It will take hours (which we don't have) for our foot soldiers to even get into rifle range slogging through your Lowland "Polders" (nasty bits of farmland if you ask me, what are you growing here? fish?).
Oh, and Colonel, you may want to hold on to that request for the Environment Impact Report because I'm going to see about drying your troops out with a little more fire from the sky. I suggest you keep your head down Colonel.
And I believe that "rooky artillerist" who likes the smoke so much must have come from Amsterdam ( and we all know what that means ... pothead ). He must have finished what he was smokin' and decided he needed to smoke every beautiful hill on the map.
As for my men, I can assure none of them are "impaired." Well, except for my Topos. Those **** lazy special forces men have pretty much decided to take a siesta during this battle (arriving turn 99:mad: )
Oh, and Colonel, you may want to hold on to that request for the Environment Impact Report because I'm going to see about drying your troops out with a little more fire from the sky. I suggest you keep your head down Colonel.
And I believe that "rooky artillerist" who likes the smoke so much must have come from Amsterdam ( and we all know what that means ... pothead ). He must have finished what he was smokin' and decided he needed to smoke every beautiful hill on the map.
As for my men, I can assure none of them are "impaired." Well, except for my Topos. Those **** lazy special forces men have pretty much decided to take a siesta during this battle (arriving turn 99:mad: )
Everyone is a potential [PBEM] enemy, every place a potential [PBEM] battlefield. --Zensunni Wisdom
See, another reason to flee
Complaining about the rain? Oh yes i forgot: "In spain it mainly rains in the plains" Well here it rains everywhere.
Usually those drops are smaller than 210 mm though
.
Meanwhile i have another thing to settle with my "morocan drugs debilitated" gunner.
When we paint those yellow numbers two round in advance, you should have enough time to hit where we ask you
Say what is the matter with your MC squads are they composed of unarmed court martial cases? They die so easily, please send some more troops like that
As for your Topos squad, well that is your own fault for two reasons:
1) If you wanted to make sure they arrive you should have escorted them with your more reliable troops
and more importantly 2) "Topos" is very close to "Tapas" so the mistake is easily made, and your men will sleep till 7 in the evening and then will go to a bar to drink something and eat some tapas. But don't despair, people under influence of alcohol tend to do strange things.
Note to self: Why am i consoling a renegade american in collusion with oathbreakers?:rolleyes: Must have something to do with that stash of morocan contraband i impounded from a certain gunner.
Usually those drops are smaller than 210 mm though
.Meanwhile i have another thing to settle with my "morocan drugs debilitated" gunner.
When we paint those yellow numbers two round in advance, you should have enough time to hit where we ask you
Say what is the matter with your MC squads are they composed of unarmed court martial cases? They die so easily, please send some more troops like that
As for your Topos squad, well that is your own fault for two reasons:
1) If you wanted to make sure they arrive you should have escorted them with your more reliable troops
and more importantly 2) "Topos" is very close to "Tapas" so the mistake is easily made, and your men will sleep till 7 in the evening and then will go to a bar to drink something and eat some tapas. But don't despair, people under influence of alcohol tend to do strange things.
Note to self: Why am i consoling a renegade american in collusion with oathbreakers?:rolleyes: Must have something to do with that stash of morocan contraband i impounded from a certain gunner.
As for those motorcycle squads driving full speed in the direction of Spain, they drove past me so fast I barley had time to stop them and get their report that as opposed to their tiny little rifles, the Dutch motorcyle squads carry 3 MGs each!:eek: So, we decided that they would just stick to keeping an eye on that large force you have in the North all grouped together and just asking for some 210mm attention.
I told you I would stop rearranging the landscape in the Southwest where you keep those rats with binoculars.
And don't be to hard on your pothead artillery man, he did manage to score a few hits. He did better than my men in their last barrage.
As for the Topos, I rounded up those taking a siesta and executed them. We shall see how the remaining men carry out their task...
<--- that's a Moroccan spy.
I told you I would stop rearranging the landscape in the Southwest where you keep those rats with binoculars.And don't be to hard on your pothead artillery man, he did manage to score a few hits. He did better than my men in their last barrage.
As for the Topos, I rounded up those taking a siesta and executed them. We shall see how the remaining men carry out their task...
<--- that's a Moroccan spy. Everyone is a potential [PBEM] enemy, every place a potential [PBEM] battlefield. --Zensunni Wisdom
Just a quick note because "Mrs. General Bob" is calling me away from the battle field.
Col. Van Bolhuis is going to get bad news when he wakes up Sunday morning! That artillery plot I warned him about just landed and I lost count of the number of casualties he suffered with all that 210mm "rain" landing over there.
His batteries did inflict a little damage to my troops but nothing on the scale of the devastation I just witnessed.
Now if I can only get these rookie troops rallied and moving forward.
Col. Van Bolhuis is going to get bad news when he wakes up Sunday morning! That artillery plot I warned him about just landed and I lost count of the number of casualties he suffered with all that 210mm "rain" landing over there.
His batteries did inflict a little damage to my troops but nothing on the scale of the devastation I just witnessed.
Now if I can only get these rookie troops rallied and moving forward.
Everyone is a potential [PBEM] enemy, every place a potential [PBEM] battlefield. --Zensunni Wisdom
Purple rain.....
That 210 mm did and does hurt.
On the bright side, telegrams with "Dear mr/mrs we regret to inform you that your son..." are cheaper than purple hearts...
Of course spanish letters are even cheaper, so we will try to make them send some post home too
Meanwhile nothing much is happening, his troops are stil chickening out somewhere, but what do you expect it is raining and in the 16th and 17th century we also scared the spanish troops away with water
We'll see what happens when (if ) we survive that 210 mm bombardment....
On the bright side, telegrams with "Dear mr/mrs we regret to inform you that your son..." are cheaper than purple hearts...
Of course spanish letters are even cheaper, so we will try to make them send some post home too
Meanwhile nothing much is happening, his troops are stil chickening out somewhere, but what do you expect it is raining and in the 16th and 17th century we also scared the spanish troops away with water
We'll see what happens when (if
) we survive that 210 mm bombardment...."Chickening Out"?!!
Might I remind you Colonel, that my men hold two of the three objective areas and are enjoying the wonderful fireworks display your artillery batteries are providing for them --- up close and personal! They just wish they didn't have to camp right where the shells are exploding!
If your troops would stop "playing" in the moonscape I provided in the northwest we might actually get to see some real action on this battlefield.
If your troops would stop "playing" in the moonscape I provided in the northwest we might actually get to see some real action on this battlefield.
Everyone is a potential [PBEM] enemy, every place a potential [PBEM] battlefield. --Zensunni Wisdom
motorcycles
By the way, for your convenience i did some research into the origin of the dutch motorcycle squad armament.
It seems that the blame can be laid with a general, further to stay unnamed. His hobbies were riding the motorcycle and punching holes with bullets.
The combination of these hobbies created those motorcycles.
While i am personaly very happy with the direct consequences (3 MG MC squads) i am less than thrilled with the secondary results (all the MG's in the army placed on MC's) :rolleyes:
It seems that the blame can be laid with a general, further to stay unnamed. His hobbies were riding the motorcycle and punching holes with bullets.
The combination of these hobbies created those motorcycles.
While i am personaly very happy with the direct consequences (3 MG MC squads) i am less than thrilled with the secondary results (all the MG's in the army placed on MC's) :rolleyes:
Counting is hard.
Even after several checks Col van Bolhuis was sure that his opponent was incapable of counting.
Two out of three victory areas?
By his count there were 5 areas and the spanish had 3. So perhaps the spanish protest was correct and wasn't this a case of chickening out, but a case of not being able to count beyond 3.
Perhaps 3 in spanish means something like "to many to count"
So the message should be decifered as "we hold 2 out of umm we don't know that number areas":D
Anyway lets ask that those prisoners from that scouting motorcycle platoon. Impolite bastards, you don't interrupt an afternoon break. Sun is scarce enough in this country that sunbathing is virtually a sacrosanct act
Oh btw, i can assure you that by now most of my troops have stopped playing ever umm in the moonlandscape i mean...
Two out of three victory areas?
By his count there were 5 areas and the spanish had 3. So perhaps the spanish protest was correct and wasn't this a case of chickening out, but a case of not being able to count beyond 3.
Perhaps 3 in spanish means something like "to many to count"
So the message should be decifered as "we hold 2 out of umm we don't know that number areas":D
Anyway lets ask that those prisoners from that scouting motorcycle platoon. Impolite bastards, you don't interrupt an afternoon break. Sun is scarce enough in this country that sunbathing is virtually a sacrosanct act
Oh btw, i can assure you that by now most of my troops have stopped playing ever umm in the moonlandscape i mean...
I stand corrected.
I should say, 2 of the 3 "contested" VH areas. We all know you have no hope of gaining my backfield VHs. And, since most of my Topos (Spec. Forces) have decided to sit out this meeting engagement:mad: , I don't think I have much hope of taking your starting VHs. Unless, of course, you are so foolish as to waste all of your troops assaulting the VHs I have locked up with impenetrable interlaced killing fields of fire. (General Bob said, hoping the Colonel would buy this bit of disinformation.)
(General Bob said, hoping the Colonel would buy this bit of disinformation.) Everyone is a potential [PBEM] enemy, every place a potential [PBEM] battlefield. --Zensunni Wisdom
I shouldn't have said "killing fields." The Colonels 150mm arty just tattooed many of my units. But the Colonel's men seem to have disappeared into the countryside. I can hardly see any of his units. Where have you gotten to my friend?
Everyone is a potential [PBEM] enemy, every place a potential [PBEM] battlefield. --Zensunni Wisdom
Time is flowing like a river, ever mountain up
Puzzled Colonel van Bolhuis looked at the battle field. Again bringing his binoculars to his eyes he looked at an AT gun. It looked perfectly normal. Except. it wasn't supposed to be there, and five minutes ago it wasn't. It teleported approx 200 meters. Several other units had suffered the same fate.
Artillery shells impacting on the spanish held hills suddens reappeard, flew backwards, fixing the meadows. Only to drop down again. Inflicting different casualties.
His watch....
It just went back five minutes and suddenly went forward again...
"I really must stop researching that morocan contraband i took from that gunner. Even if it is all for science" the colonel thought
"Anyway, there is a battle going on, lets find some more MC squads to question"
Artillery shells impacting on the spanish held hills suddens reappeard, flew backwards, fixing the meadows. Only to drop down again. Inflicting different casualties.
His watch....
It just went back five minutes and suddenly went forward again...
"I really must stop researching that morocan contraband i took from that gunner. Even if it is all for science" the colonel thought
"Anyway, there is a battle going on, lets find some more MC squads to question"
None of my men were smokin' that "wackie tabaccy." I think you should lay off the hashish Colonel. Dead men tell no tales and they certainly don't get up and walk around!:rolleyes:
(I hope your timewarp has been completed and we can get back to the smackdown.)
(I hope your timewarp has been completed and we can get back to the smackdown.)
Everyone is a potential [PBEM] enemy, every place a potential [PBEM] battlefield. --Zensunni Wisdom
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TimeTanker
- Posts: 148
- Joined: Sat Jun 15, 2002 4:13 am
- Location: Chico,CA
- Contact:
Timewarp?
Did somebody mention a Timewarp?
If you have could you send it round right away? I lost mine in Bastogne. I traded it for one of our Harleys with some crazy SS Officer that claimed that in the future there will be these things called Computators. He said he was really from the future and had the distinguished title of "Techno-Geek".
I said that was a fancy name for some one that bites the heads off of Chickens in the Carnival.
So if you have found my Timewarp (it has my name in fingernail polish on the bottom near the exhaust port from the warp generator) could you send it to me by pushing the return button on the left side of the decade readout guage?
Thanks guys, and I really got some serious laughs from your posts.
If you have could you send it round right away? I lost mine in Bastogne. I traded it for one of our Harleys with some crazy SS Officer that claimed that in the future there will be these things called Computators. He said he was really from the future and had the distinguished title of "Techno-Geek".
I said that was a fancy name for some one that bites the heads off of Chickens in the Carnival.
So if you have found my Timewarp (it has my name in fingernail polish on the bottom near the exhaust port from the warp generator) could you send it to me by pushing the return button on the left side of the decade readout guage?
Thanks guys, and I really got some serious laughs from your posts.
"You can run...but, you will only die tired"
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Supervisor
- Posts: 5160
- Joined: Tue Mar 02, 2004 12:00 am